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The I Feel Down Topic.

I really do feel for your situation. I was emotionally bullied at school, and it stopped in a very messy way.
Unfortunately I am on holiday from work or I would of asked the safeguarding team for advice on this.

One question, is this a council funded unit or a private one?

There are a couple of ways you could go with this,

1) do nothing

2) Complain, Complain and Complain some more about his behaviour and it doing your head in, to your teacher as the behaviour happens. carry on until your teacher tells you to shut up then say "If it was dealt with, I would not have anything to complain about" then start the cycle again, repeat until they rein him in or you are talking with the headteacher.

3) put a written request in to the headteacher for the safeguarding and anti bullying policies, this will raise eyebrows. He/She may ask you why you want them. the reply should be "I believe you are not safeguarding my emotional or physiological heath" that will get questions asked. Do research into other cases like this, and who is in charge higher up and is your headteacher boss or the council safeguarding officer. they don't like the idea of people with more power than them getting involved.

4) Is the messy way. and in my option should only be used when all else fails. Now I have been wondering if I should put the idea in your head. and I have decided not to.

Just remember, you condition means you do get hung up on something. use this to find a good way of addressing your problems at school. Don't get hung up on one way to get to the end, use it to find the best way to end the problem.

Good luck with it. :)
 
The only help I seem to able to get for depression are those which are meant as coping stratergies or to take the edge off. I know this may make me sound naïve and childish, but I don't want any of that. Coping isn't living. Coping is trudging through the thick mud, when I want to be on the soft sand. There seems to be no intention of getting me free of depression, to cure this parasite, but to instead treat it like some kind of permanant characteristic that will have to be fought every second of everyday.

If the best I can look forward to is the internal fight with the bombardment of self-hatered ruining everything from the moment I wake till the moment I go to sleep, then that's it, I don't see the point of continuing to live. Even as I write this, my mind is telling me I'm a melodramatic little prick who is arrogant to even consider this a problem worth mentioning considering the world of despair out there and horrific unfair experiences of people in the world.

I want someone to tell me that it will go away, and that it won't be a life long struggle. I want someone to say that my life will be as easy (emotionally speaking) as those who don't have depression. I don't want to fight myself, I don't want to have to embrace the parasite, I just want it gone. Is that too much to ask?

Ugh I hate myself for such pathetic self-pity.

I have sought professional help but it isn't help. It's a marketised mess where I'm not listened to, as the only consideration is offering the cheapest 'solution'. If anything, it has pushed me closer to suicide more than any single event.
 
Dunno what it is about the last few days, but I really feel as if I've been slipping downward. I just feel more and more lonely as the days go past - not just in terms of general friendship (though that's a massive contributor), but in a deeper sense as well.

Every time I come in to contact (either directly, or through the most tenuous, indirect link possible, like a passing comment from someone uninvolved) with the person who made me feel entirely undesirable way back in March, I just get all the same feelings flooding back again. I'm just a "stalker", with "mega-odd" interests; an "uber-nerd" (even though this person is every bit as nerdy as me when it comes to theme parks), and just basically someone to be ridiculed. Even after all these months, I can't stop thinking about any of it, just as I can't stop thinking about that p***k of a person.

Everyone around me seems to be getting engaged (lost count), getting married (going to 4 or 5 weddings in 2014), or having children (two pregnancies within my friends, and a third seems more than likely soon), and I can't even reach the first step (unsurprising given what sort of a person I apparently am).

All that aside, I just want to be around friends again, like at Uni. I know I've got a lot of them here on TST, but they're all scattered across the country, and although I can strike up a Facebook conversation fairly easily, it's entirely incomparable to just being able to talk face to face on a near-daily basis. Heck, I'm about to spend just under a week with such friends, and all I can think about is returning to isolation afterwards.

I spent my entire school life being an unsociable loner, and it didn't really phase me. I'm now in more or less the same position (if not a hundred times worse, because I don't have the day-to-day interaction that school brings), and I am near suicidal because of it.
 
Mark, if it helps then I feel a bit similar to you (although not on a severe level as you)

I used to hang around a lot with my friends during Secondary School, but I was never really a sociable person during that time. When I left, I became pretty much sociable in the outside world. I'm not really that confident when trying to make new real life friends. Like you, I feel like I'm missing out on a lot when I see my old mates doing fun stuff.

I do feel for you and find your whole situation really upsetting. Sure we have everyone else on here who are a fantastic bunch of guys/gals and our great fun to meet up with. But going to a theme park once a month (And not even every month) doesn't do a whole lot compared to being around with people you know for at least 5 days a week.

Hope you're okay mate. Sorry if this advice doesn't seem helpful to you.
 
This is pathetic compared with other people's real problems, but it's getting me down.

I struggle with self-esteem anyway, and no matter what people say, I'm pretty convinced nobody likes me and that nobody wants to spend time with me. I don't have many of my own friends, especially in my local area. They are just my husband's friends.

This weekend loads of you guys are off to EP, a place I desperately want to go to, some others are off to spend a few days at AT, where I absolutely love staying. I tried to arrange to go for one night as we can't afford the whole thing, but the husband says no. He's at work, and I'm stuck in the flat alone. I can't even really go out and find something to do because I sprained my ankle really badly nearly 2 weeks ago and it's still sore and weak.

I just feel down and alone. I know this isn't strictly true, but if feels like everyone else is off having fun, and I'm insanely jealous.
 
Amy_D said:
This is pathetic compared with other people's real problems, but it's getting me down.

I struggle with self-esteem anyway, and no matter what people say, I'm pretty convinced nobody likes me and that nobody wants to spend time with me. I don't have many of my own friends, especially in my local area. They are just my husband's friends.

This weekend loads of you guys are off to EP, a place I desperately want to go to, some others are off to spend a few days at AT, where I absolutely love staying. I tried to arrange to go for one night as we can't afford the whole thing, but the husband says no. He's at work, and I'm stuck in the flat alone. I can't even really go out and find something to do because I sprained my ankle really badly nearly 2 weeks ago and it's still sore and weak.

I just feel down and alone. I know this isn't strictly true, but if feels like everyone else is off having fun, and I'm insanely jealous.

It is insane how nobody likes you, Amy. You truly are a lovely person and deserve to have loads of people who like you!
 
Amy_D said:
This is pathetic compared with other people's real problems, but it's getting me down.

I struggle with self-esteem anyway, and no matter what people say, I'm pretty convinced nobody likes me and that nobody wants to spend time with me. I don't have many of my own friends, especially in my local area. They are just my husband's friends.

This weekend loads of you guys are off to EP, a place I desperately want to go to, some others are off to spend a few days at AT, where I absolutely love staying. I tried to arrange to go for one night as we can't afford the whole thing, but the husband says no. He's at work, and I'm stuck in the flat alone. I can't even really go out and find something to do because I sprained my ankle really badly nearly 2 weeks ago and it's still sore and weak.

I just feel down and alone. I know this isn't strictly true, but if feels like everyone else is off having fun, and I'm insanely jealous.

If nobody liked you, explain NYE? We wouldn't be arranging to go to visit someone we didn't like!
 
Thank you for the reassurances, guys. It's hard to explain, but the one useful thing the therapist explained to me last year during my unsuccessful CBT was that my own beliefs that people don't like me, cause me to interpret everything to back up this belief. So, although it's nice to read what you've all said... I still see evidence to the contrary everywhere I look. Hence it gets me down at times.

Meh. Love you all!
 
[not really a 'down' post, more of a 'I don't know how feels' post and I need to publicly vent a little]

I've been a little too distant from TST and an awful lot of friends on here over the last few months or so and I'm not sure if anybody's noticed (if anybody had, then obviously it would've been commented on). I don't know if it's just me at a time where many other, say, important things have been a distraction from actually socialising with more than just a few very close individuals but I do just feel very disconnected from the community nowadays and it's equally disconcerting.

It's strange how different things were 2 years ago, good and bad alike, but I hope I haven't changed too much and become too anti social or shy in comparison to the (speculatively) bubbly person that I'm fairly known to be.

Rah rah rambles rah rah... *makes a newfound grumpy expression*

[/not really a 'down' post, more of a 'I don't know how feels' post and I need to publicly vent a little]
 
Rowe said:
I've been a little too distant from TST and an awful lot of friends on here over the last few months or so and I'm not sure if anybody's noticed (if anybody had, then obviously it would've been commented on). I don't know if it's just me at a time where many other, say, important things have been a distraction from actually socialising with more than just a few very close individuals but I do just feel very disconnected from the community nowadays and it's equally disconcerting.

It's strange how different things were 2 years ago, good and bad alike, but I hope I haven't changed too much and become too anti social or shy in comparison to the (speculatively) bubbly person that I'm fairly known to be.

[Post from my mind, be prepared for random drivel. There are 8 drivels per row, all rows offer a front drivel view]

We (well when I say we, I mean me and possibly some others) have noticed a slight drift but everyone does it! I drifted away a slight bit not long ago but people won't comment as we know it may be for one reason or another so let people sort it out themselves/come for help rather than feel like we are bugging you. I can't think of any change (I mean not even the rapids have stopped soaking you on every meet :p ). I think the drift may be from closed season and how that happens on here (Bins/Tunnel/Toilets/Other Crap)??? I don't know. I can guess but I'm pretty sure it'll be the same Rowe we love being here in 2014.

[/Post from my mind, be prepared for random drivel. There are 8 drivels per row, all rows offer a front drivel view]
 
Rowe said:
[not really a 'down' post, more of a 'I don't know how feels' post and I need to publicly vent a little]

I've been a little too distant from TST and an awful lot of friends on here over the last few months or so and I'm not sure if anybody's noticed (if anybody had, then obviously it would've been commented on). I don't know if it's just me at a time where many other, say, important things have been a distraction from actually socialising with more than just a few very close individuals but I do just feel very disconnected from the community nowadays and it's equally disconcerting.

It's strange how different things were 2 years ago, good and bad alike, but I hope I haven't changed too much and become too anti social or shy in comparison to the (speculatively) bubbly person that I'm fairly known to be.

Rah rah rambles rah rah... *makes a newfound grumpy expression*

[/not really a 'down' post, more of a 'I don't know how feels' post and I need to publicly vent a little]

I drifted away for 2/3 years then came back.

People undergo changes and their attitudes and feelings towards things change, it's a natural thing. This place will always be here and you'll always be welcomed back :)
 
<slightly random, self-indulgent claptrap>
I find myself in a similar position to Rowe, having drifted away from both the forum and other contact. I've had some personal issues and rather than seek help from friends and comfort from nutters on here, I hid away and stopped talking most people.

I want to put that right and start being more involved, however I can't help but feel like I've let people down and that they won't want me involved. I know that's patently ridiculous but deep down there's a the hidden, dormant anxiety that only awakens when other people are involved. An anxiety that can stop me doing a lot of things, and almost stopped me becoming part of this community 2/3 years ago.

Long story short, I've also drifted away and want to come back to posting and talking to other people.
</slightly random, self-indulgent claptrap>
 
As someone who's been around for more years than I dread to remember (old Barnes), I have seen a lot of people come and go. I've never really had any periods of hiatus, but I always get quite upset when, certainly people who are around a lot, stop coming so much.

I don't tend to approach them directly, because I assume they have just lost all interest in theme parks and so don't want to come anymore. But the social side of it is also important, and through a common interest in theme parks we all bond, chat and have fun.

So to those who worry they have drifted, put it into context. Rowe, Dar - you've each been seen within the last 6 months - I know some, like LiamC, who left it 2-3 years. You're still very much a part of the community, and welcome to attend meets like any other. I hope you do.

The best thing to do is to post here and there, engage on FB more, Skype yourself and put yourself out there. I have always been pro-active in finding out what's going on, as I know if I don't, people aren't always going to come to you - because there's a lot of us out there!

I too battle with anxiety, although not social anxiety (another form) - and it can sometimes feel crippling - you sometimes want to leave the group because you feel so unwell, or you just can't face going because of how it makes you feel. I try and put that to one side and carry on regardless. Usually, I am the better for it (although sometimes I hold my hands up and admit, maybe I should have had a duvet day after all).

Much love!
 
I know that feel well, brah!

I used to be a very active member here. Used to attend maybe 6 meets a year, possibly more. For someone who lives over 200 miles away from everyone that was quite a mean feat, but having started university back in 2010 I found my timing and money issues an obstacle for these meets. Even now, working full time, I find it difficult to juggle what I love to do (music) with what else I love to do (theme parks and meets). Sadly, currently paid work has to come first.

That said though, not once have I felt unwelcome and unwanted when I finally show my face or pop up in Skype. If you turn up expecting you've upset someone, you're going to believe it.

These people are wonderful people, they are fabulous. I can guarantee they all would love to see you again, no matter how big the gap. Everyone lives their own lives and everyone has to make money or get somewhere first. EVERYONE has been in a position where they've had to turn down a social event for something else they feel is more important. It's not offensive to any of us (well it isnt to me, anyway) as we've all had to do the same. If someone is really that fickle that they get annoyed when someone cant be somewhere because they need to make money or something then they're quite clearly very very naiive.

Chill guys, don't worry! We all love you still.
 
I find that the people on this forum are some of the most awesome people I know. Yes its not perfect, but I pretty much always feel welcome. I get seriously uncomfortable around certain people and certain events. It's one of the reasons I still don't do the waterpark as I am so uncomfortable with others seeing me topless. I also get really embarrassed about making mistakes and that is one of the reasons I don't like booking things over the phone and would much rather book online (especially if its booking stuff in another language such as EP).

The fact is though, this forum is very understanding and I know that people will understand my feelings and accept them. There is no reason to think that others won't accept you so long as you are prepared to accept others.
 
As has been said, the people on this forum are fantastic friends, and I know we have our disagreements about some topics, but we can still be friends and enjoy a laugh together.

I did not buy a MAP in 2012 and only attended one meet, but last year I have attended more regularly, and after 5 minutes it felt like I had not been away. There were some new faces, but everything else was just the same.

The closed season is always a little bit of a low for us, but we have the Facebook Group for closed season event, which everyone is welcome to join. If anyone is not a member, let me have your email, and I will send an invite out so you can join in. The same applies to Skype, I know its mostly the night owls among us who use it, but everyone is welcome to join in, and there is nothing stopping you from starting a call. There is nearly always someone about to join in, and if not, just post in the lobby and someone will respond when they see it.

Ian
 
I'd like to add to this, that I've only been around on meets since the end of August, with the Staffordshire Sandwich meet being my first. Rowe and Dar, I've always considered you as completely part of this amazing group of people that I want to be part of so much, so you can't have been that absent! I have to agree with what everyone else has said, about this community being so accepting, and just downright fantastic. I can't see anyone having a problem if people go through periods where they aren't around as much for whatever reason.

I also struggle with anxiety, both social and more generalised. I always assume that I'm not wanted, not accepted, people don't want me around. The other day, my paranoia got to the point that I sent a text to poor Sazzle quizzing her, just because I trust her to be honest with me (Sorry Saz!) It's taking me a while, and I have little lapses, but I have never felt so comfortable with a group of friends, than I do with TST. So, I guess my point is, this really is an exceptional group of people. Each and every one of us has difficulties with something, so I'm sure there is very little anyone could do to exclude themselves.

Not sure if this makes sense. As usual when I feel passionately about something, I have gone off on a bit of a tangent!
 
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