TowersStreet Wiki - User contributions [en]

Corkscrew

2012-03-16T15:57:10Z

Sam198: Isn't Vekoma situated in Holland? (where they speak dutch)

Corkscrew was a [[roller coaster]] located at [[Alton Towers]] between April 4th 1980 and November 9th 2008. It opened as the first double inverting [[roller coaster]] in the UK (although that's a bit of a cheeky claim, considering Irn Bru Revolution in [[Mandyland|Blackpool]] had technically been inverting riders twice per ride since 1979).

== History ==
Corkscrew was purchased by <nowiki>Alton Towers</nowiki> from Ikea, as a flat packed [[rollercoaster]] (it was designed by two stoned Dutch engineering students - later to be known as [[Vekoma]]). The instructions stated that assembly should have taken approximately 45 minutes but ended up taking about 6 months, as Towers staff struggled to understand the Dutch instructions. It eventually opened as the first <nowiki>rollercoaster</nowiki> in the UK to turn riders upside down going through a corkscrew rather than a loop and without any launches (or something).

Despite the fact that Blackpool already had a looping ride, everyone conveniently forgot about it and all descended on <nowiki>Alton Towers</nowiki> instead.

==Ride Experience==

Corkscrew dominated Festival Park/Ug Land for most of its life, until, in an act of extremely poor park planning, someone plonked [[Rita]] in front of it which made finding the ride a challenge. A further obstacle was the bucket-trains themselves, which held the record for world's least accessible coaster cars until the opening of [[Colossus]] at [[Thorpe Park]] in 2002.

Anyone who succeeded in getting onto the ride was in a for a real treat in the form of the spectacular views from the top of the lift hill. A relatively slow turnaround followed, leading to the first drop. This is arguably the best part of the ride and provides great airtime at the back of the train. Unfortunately the train now has to go round a corner, which for some reason it seems rather inept at doing, in the process your head will probably become very well acquainted with the restraints.

After the corkscrews, a turnaround and the second drop are both smaller versions of the first part of the ride. Older versions of this ride made by [[Arrow]] ended here, Corkscrew’s second half makes that look a good idea, as the rest of the ride has no interesting features whatsoever. The helix that follows meanders up and down slightly - probably as a normal helix would be too boring. As a 'big finish' the ride trundles slowly around its perimeter as if marking out its territory before hopefully arriving back in the station, though occasionally it needed 'encouragement' from the staff to get it off the break run.

==Closure==

In 2008 it was announced that the ride was to close to make way for something half decent ([[Th13teen]]). The reaction to this news was a collective [[Meh|meh]], as the ride was completely past it by this point, and there was another one at Flamingoland anyway. Still, it offered enthusiasts an excuse to make yet another trip to [[Alton_Towers|Alton Towers]] to get one last ride on a coaster that the previous year most of them would hardly ever even consider going on.

==Legacy==

To mark the outstanding contribution Corkscrew had made to neck injuries over three decades, Corkscrew's corkscrews were retained by the park and erected at the entrance plaza, confusing a large proportion of guests arriving on the [[Monorail|monorail]] into thinking it's a new ride.

[[Category:Roller Coaster]]

Alton Towers

2012-03-16T15:49:41Z

Sam198:

Alton Towers is a theme park in Staffordshire, which this entire wiki is about (well, almost) and is blatantly the best in all of the UK for everything. The park is awesomes. And anybody here would not beg to differ because they are delusional.

The park is named after the manor-like ruins of a family estate, which stand on top of a hill opposite the main entrance past a very, very, very, very huge lake containing a [[Giant Squid|giant squid]]. There is also a slightly interesting garden. It is common misconception that the ruins are a [[castle]]. No don't be stupid. That is not a <nowiki>castle</nowiki>, that is nowhere near a <nowiki>castle</nowiki>, you blithering idiot. There is already a <nowiki>castle</nowiki> in Alton and it's OUTSIDE OF THE PARK, named [[Alton Castle]]. It's too small to be a <nowiki>castle</nowiki> anyway!

[[File:ATLogo.jpg|200px|thumb|right|Wow.]]

The home used to be the summer residence of the wealthy Talbot family, best known for the inherited title, Earl of Shrewsbury (weird eh? Shrewsbury is a fair old way from the park!). This is the same family responsible for [[Hex]] happening, a <s>un</s>true account of the 15th Earl of Shrewsbury deciding not to pay tax to a government crone.

The park opened in 1980 with the [[Corkscrew]] [[roller coaster]], and was immediately praised by the public for being a better than good theme park in England. Since then, Alton Towers has had a multitude of various rides ranging from the tame and meek to zOMFG, to appeal to all ages.

If anybody in park is found to dislike everything and anything in park, proclaiming somewhere like [[Thorpe Park]] is better, then they are fed to the [[Giant_Squid|giant squid]] and their relatives/friends/co-workers minds are erased of their existence. This is the reason why [[Chav|chavs]] are currently in the 'Threatened: Vulnerable' category of the Conservation status.

Alton Towers are famous for having a vicious,child-eating [[monofail]] manufactured by [[Von Roll]], and opened by William Shatner of ''Star Trek'' fame. How's that for publicity?

== Hotel ==

''Main article: [[Alton Towers Hotel]]''

In 1996 Alton Towers said to the Staffordshire council "I can haz hotel yes?" so they agreed and the result was an overpriced hotel, [[Alton Towers Hotel]] which is slightly better than your average [[Travelodge|Travelodge]]. Some time later they decided they needed another one, which was also only slightly better than the average <nowiki>Travelodge</nowiki>. [[Splash Landings Hotel]] opened in 2003 complete with a waterpark, which you have to give over your family fortune to get into, and is slightly worse (albeit much cleaner) and than the nearby Water World, mon.

== Rides & Attractions ==

=== Rollercoasters ===

*[[Nemesis]]
*[[Air]]
*[[Oblivion]]
*[[Rita]]
*[[Th13teen]]
*[[Sonic Spinball]]
*[[Runaway Mine Train]]
*<s>[[The Magic]]</s>

=== Thrill Rides ===

*[[Ripsaw]]
*[[Blade]]
*[[Submission]]
*[[Enterprise]]

=== Water Rides ===

*[[The Flume]]
*[[Congo River Rapids]]
*[[Mutiny Bay|Battle Galleons]]

===Family Rides===

*[[Hex - The Legend of the Towers]]
*[[Duel]]
*[[Marauders Mayhem]]
*[[Twirling Toadstool]]

=== Kids Rides ===

*[[Charlie and the Chocolate Factory: The Ride]]
*[[Heave Ho!]]
*[[Squirrel Nutty]]
*[[Gallopers Carousel]]
*[[Peugeot 207 Driving School]]
*[[Frog Hopper]]
*[[Riverbank Eye Spy]]
*[[Doodle Doo Derby]]
*[[Old MacDonald's Tractor Ride]]

=== Transport ===

*[[Monorail]]
*[[Skyride]]

=== Misc ===

*[[Berry Bish Bash]]
*[[Haunted Hollow]]
*[[Sharkbait Reef]]
* <s>'''New for 2011!''' Shrek 4D Cinema!</s>
*[[Towers Complex & Gardens]]
*[[There's Something in the Dungheap]]
*(and anything else deemed worthy of a page)

=== Past Rides ===

*[[Corkscrew]]
*[[Toyland Tours]]
*[[Thunderlooper]]
*[[The Beastie]]
*[[Doom and Sons]]

[[Category:Theme Park]]

Colossus

2011-12-23T14:08:50Z

Sam198:

''This article contains graciously stolen material from Unencyclopedia.''

Colossus, [[Thorpe Park]]'s first real [[roller coaster]] set within the [[Lost City]]. Built in 2002 by [[Intamin]], a company notable for creating unreliable (and dangerous) rides, Colossus is the world's first money extraction coaster, and has been cleverly designed to remove all your spare change, body piercings, belly button fluff, internal organs and small children from your possession. It opened as the world's first rollercoaster in which the track goes upside down ten times. It has surprisingly never stalled with people on it.

To save money, the park maintenance team has removed all the wheels from this ride to save greasing the bearings. The sound of grinding metal can be heard all over London, even above the constant sound of gun shots.

B&M coasters are well known for their roar. Colossus, sadly, sounds like an oil drum filled with stones from Brighton Beach, placed in a shopping trolley with a missing wheel, and pushed down the cobbled hill from the old Hovis advert. Only less pleasing to the ear.

===Fan Nicknames===

*Colossucks
*Lolossus
*For-The-Lossus

===Chav Nicknames===

*Colossal
*THE Colossus

[[Category: Faff Ride]]
[[Category: Roller Coaster]]

Alton Towers

2011-12-23T13:53:30Z

Sam198:

Alton Towers is a theme park in Staffordshire, which this entire wiki is about (well, almost) and is blatantly the best in all of the UK for everything. The park is awesomes. And anybody here would not beg to differ because they are delusional.

The park is named after the manor-like ruins of a family estate, which stand on top of a hill opposite the main entrance past a very, very, very, very huge lake containing a [[Giant Squid|giant squid]]. There is also a slightly interesting garden. It is common misconception that the ruins are a [[castle]]. No don't be stupid. That is not a <nowiki>castle</nowiki>, that is nowhere near a <nowiki>castle</nowiki>, you blithering idiot. There is already a <nowiki>castle</nowiki> in Alton and it's OUTSIDE OF THE PARK, named [[Alton Castle]]. It's too small to be a <nowiki>castle</nowiki> anyway!

[[File:ATLogo.jpg|200px|thumb|right|Wow.]]

The home used to be the summer residence of the wealthy Talbot family, best known for the inherited title, Earl of Shrewsbury (weird eh? Shrewsbury is a fair old way from the park!). This is the same family responsible for [[Hex]] happening, a <s>un</s>true account of the 15th Earl of Shrewsbury deciding not to pay tax to a government crone.

The park opened in 1980 with the [[Corkscrew]] [[roller coaster]], and was immediately praised by the public for being a better than good theme park in England. Since then, Alton Towers has had a multitude of various rides ranging from the tame and meek to zOMFG, to appeal to all ages.

If anybody in park is found to dislike everything and anything in park, proclaiming somewhere like [[Thorpe Park]] is better, then they are fed to the [[Giant_Squid|giant squid]] and their relatives/friends/co-workers minds are erased of their existence. This is the reason why [[Chav|chavs]] are currently in the 'Threatened: Vulnerable' category of the Conservation status.

Alton Towers are famous for having a [[monofail]] manufactured by [[Von Roll]], and opened by William Shatner of ''Star Trek'' fame. How's that for publicity?

== Hotel ==

''Main article: [[Alton Towers Hotel]]''

In 1996 Alton Towers said to the Staffordshire council "I can haz hotel yes?" so they agreed and the result was an overpriced hotel, [[Alton Towers Hotel]] which is slightly better than your average [[Travelodge|Travelodge]]. Some time later they decided they needed another one, which was also only slightly better than the average <nowiki>Travelodge</nowiki>. [[Splash Landings Hotel]] opened in 2003 complete with a waterpark, which you have to give over your family fortune to get into, and is slightly worse (albeit much cleaner) and than the nearby Water World, mon.

== Rides & Attractions ==

=== Rollercoasters ===

*[[Nemesis]]
*[[Air]]
*[[Oblivion]]
*[[Rita]]
*[[Th13teen]]
*[[Sonic Spinball]]
*[[Runaway Mine Train]]
*[[The Magic]]

=== Thrill Rides ===

*[[Ripsaw]]
*[[Blade]]
*[[Submission]]
*[[Enterprise]]

=== Water Rides ===

*[[The Flume]]
*[[Congo River Rapids]]
*[[Mutiny Bay|Battle Galleons]]

===Family Rides===

*[[Hex - The Legend of the Towers]]
*[[Duel]]
*[[Marauders Mayhem]]
*[[Twirling Toadstool]]

=== Kids Rides ===

*[[Charlie and the Chocolate Factory: The Ride]]
*[[Heave Ho!]]
*[[Squirrel Nutty]]
*[[Gallopers Carousel]]
*[[Peugeot 207 Driving School]]
*[[Frog Hopper]]
*[[Riverbank Eye Spy]]
*[[Doodle Doo Derby]]
*[[Old MacDonald's Tractor Ride]]

=== Transport ===

*[[Monorail]]
*[[Skyride]]

=== Misc ===

*[[Berry Bish Bash]]
*[[Haunted Hollow]]
*[[Sharkbait Reef]]
* <s>'''New for 2011!''' Shrek 4D Cinema!</s>
*[[Towers Complex & Gardens]]
*[[There's Something in the Dungheap]]
*(and anything else deemed worthy of a page)

=== Past Rides ===

*[[Corkscrew]]
*[[Toyland Tours]]
*[[Thunderlooper]]
*[[The Beastie]]
*[[Doom and Sons]]

[[Category:Theme Park]]