TowersStreet Wiki - User contributions [en]

Cloud Cuckoo Land

2012-03-20T19:19:03Z

Wardbjuk: /* Current Rides and Attractions */

Cloud <s>COCK</s>Cuckoo Land is one of the newer areas of [[Alton_Towers|Alton Towers]], catering to the under 12s as a delusional land of fancy... with big painted flowers on the wall. Everything is meant to be in a horrible shade of pastel in order to make this delusion work. Cloud Cuckoo Land is also the home of many [[bees]].

[[File:CloudCuckoo.jpg|200px|right|thumb|We're not taking drugs, promise!]]

Cloud Cuckoo Land is thought to be one of the most rethemed areas in the entire park, because the interests of children change so often that [[Alton_Towers|Alton Towers]] must run along with the demographic to keep up, thus bringing the current amount of rethemes up to ''n''.

The most remembered themed areas are Cred Street and Land of Make Believe.

Cloud Cuckoo Land is also home to [[Snorlix the Dragon]], who is possibly more harmless than the [[Wraiths]] but that is currently being put up for discussion.

=== Current Rides and Attractions ===

*[[Charlie and the Chocolate Factory: The Ride]] - Do you like chocolate? Do you like factories? Do you like Roald Dahl's ''Charlie and the Chocolate Factory''? Even if you do, then '''DON'T RIDE THIS'''.

*[[Peugeot 207 Driving School|Driving School]] - The perfect driving ride for any youngster who wishes to collect speeding tickets.

*[[Twirling Toadstool]] - The world's most horrific and frightening Wave Swinger.

*[[Frog Hopper]] - The world's most defying and feared drop tower... themed as a frog.

*[[Gallopers Carousel]] - Possibly the campiest, brightly painted carousel in existence. It is advised that if you're male, you do not ride under any circumstances. No real reason. Just that you'll look stupid.

*Ice Age - The 4D Experience - Installed to prove that even the Ice Age had warmer weather than Staffordshire.

=== Former Rides and Attractions ===

*[[Toyland Tours]] - Was one of the best ever, most exciting and thrilling, amazing, spectacular, wonderful, awesome, brilliant and exceeding expectation ride in the whole of creation. Strangely enough, [[John_Wardley|John Wardley]] may not have had a hand in making this former wonderful boat sensation. [http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=8oQeE8B5RlI Was also home to...]

*Nickleodeon Outta Control - SBNO attraction between 1997 and 1998, hiding behind where Frog Hopper is now. Was an attempt to cashwhore in on the cartoon channel Nickleodeon's success but due to <s>crap</s> low through-put, was [[Closed|closed]]. [http://old.towerstimes.co.uk/history/articles/nick.htm The interior is still intact however.]

*Doom And Sons - The park's first scare attraction, preceding [[Duel|The Haunted House]] and according to reviews, was good. Sadly there isn't enough information or photos of the former attraction to actually talk about it.

[[Category: Themed Area]]

Cloud Cuckoo Land

2012-03-20T19:17:45Z

Wardbjuk: /* Current Rides and Attractions */

Cloud <s>COCK</s>Cuckoo Land is one of the newer areas of [[Alton_Towers|Alton Towers]], catering to the under 12s as a delusional land of fancy... with big painted flowers on the wall. Everything is meant to be in a horrible shade of pastel in order to make this delusion work. Cloud Cuckoo Land is also the home of many [[bees]].

[[File:CloudCuckoo.jpg|200px|right|thumb|We're not taking drugs, promise!]]

Cloud Cuckoo Land is thought to be one of the most rethemed areas in the entire park, because the interests of children change so often that [[Alton_Towers|Alton Towers]] must run along with the demographic to keep up, thus bringing the current amount of rethemes up to ''n''.

The most remembered themed areas are Cred Street and Land of Make Believe.

Cloud Cuckoo Land is also home to [[Snorlix the Dragon]], who is possibly more harmless than the [[Wraiths]] but that is currently being put up for discussion.

=== Current Rides and Attractions ===

*[[Charlie and the Chocolate Factory: The Ride]] - Do you like chocolate? Do you like factories? Do you like Roald Dahl's ''Charlie and the Chocolate Factory''? If you do, then '''DON'T RIDE THIS'''.

*[[Peugeot 207 Driving School|Driving School]] - The perfect driving ride for any youngster who wishes to collect speeding tickets.

*[[Twirling Toadstool]] - The world's most horrific and frightening Wave Swinger.

*[[Frog Hopper]] - The world's most defying and feared drop tower... themed as a frog.

*[[Gallopers Carousel]] - Possibly the campiest, brightly painted carousel in existence. It is advised that if you're male, you do not ride under any circumstances. No real reason. Just that you'll look stupid.

*Ice Age - The 4D Experience - Installed to prove that even the Ice Age had warmer weather than Staffordshire.

=== Former Rides and Attractions ===

*[[Toyland Tours]] - Was one of the best ever, most exciting and thrilling, amazing, spectacular, wonderful, awesome, brilliant and exceeding expectation ride in the whole of creation. Strangely enough, [[John_Wardley|John Wardley]] may not have had a hand in making this former wonderful boat sensation. [http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=8oQeE8B5RlI Was also home to...]

*Nickleodeon Outta Control - SBNO attraction between 1997 and 1998, hiding behind where Frog Hopper is now. Was an attempt to cashwhore in on the cartoon channel Nickleodeon's success but due to <s>crap</s> low through-put, was [[Closed|closed]]. [http://old.towerstimes.co.uk/history/articles/nick.htm The interior is still intact however.]

*Doom And Sons - The park's first scare attraction, preceding [[Duel|The Haunted House]] and according to reviews, was good. Sadly there isn't enough information or photos of the former attraction to actually talk about it.

[[Category: Themed Area]]

Cloud Cuckoo Land

2012-03-20T19:16:40Z

Wardbjuk:

Cloud <s>COCK</s>Cuckoo Land is one of the newer areas of [[Alton_Towers|Alton Towers]], catering to the under 12s as a delusional land of fancy... with big painted flowers on the wall. Everything is meant to be in a horrible shade of pastel in order to make this delusion work. Cloud Cuckoo Land is also the home of many [[bees]].

[[File:CloudCuckoo.jpg|200px|right|thumb|We're not taking drugs, promise!]]

Cloud Cuckoo Land is thought to be one of the most rethemed areas in the entire park, because the interests of children change so often that [[Alton_Towers|Alton Towers]] must run along with the demographic to keep up, thus bringing the current amount of rethemes up to ''n''.

The most remembered themed areas are Cred Street and Land of Make Believe.

Cloud Cuckoo Land is also home to [[Snorlix the Dragon]], who is possibly more harmless than the [[Wraiths]] but that is currently being put up for discussion.

=== Current Rides and Attractions ===

*[[Charlie and the Chocolate Factory: The Ride]] - Do you like chocolate? Do you like factories? Do you like Roald Dahl's ''Charlie and the Chocolate Factory''? If you do, then '''DON'T RIDE THIS'''.

*[[Peugeot 207 Driving School|Driving School]] - The perfect driving ride for any youngster who wishes to collect speeding tickets.

*[[Twirling Toadstool]] - The world's most horrific and frightening Wave Swinger.

*[[Frog Hopper]] - The world's most defying and feared drop tower... themed as a frog.

*[[Gallopers Carousel]] - Possibly the campiest, brightly painted carousel in existence. It is advised that if you're male, you do not ride under any circumstances. No real reason. Just that you'll look stupid.

*Ice Age 4D - Installed to prove that even the Ice Age had warmer weather than Staffordshire.

=== Former Rides and Attractions ===

*[[Toyland Tours]] - Was one of the best ever, most exciting and thrilling, amazing, spectacular, wonderful, awesome, brilliant and exceeding expectation ride in the whole of creation. Strangely enough, [[John_Wardley|John Wardley]] may not have had a hand in making this former wonderful boat sensation. [http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=8oQeE8B5RlI Was also home to...]

*Nickleodeon Outta Control - SBNO attraction between 1997 and 1998, hiding behind where Frog Hopper is now. Was an attempt to cashwhore in on the cartoon channel Nickleodeon's success but due to <s>crap</s> low through-put, was [[Closed|closed]]. [http://old.towerstimes.co.uk/history/articles/nick.htm The interior is still intact however.]

*Doom And Sons - The park's first scare attraction, preceding [[Duel|The Haunted House]] and according to reviews, was good. Sadly there isn't enough information or photos of the former attraction to actually talk about it.

[[Category: Themed Area]]

Alternative ride names

2012-02-13T11:50:36Z

Wardbjuk:

According to the bizarre and convoluted unwritten rules of TTF meet ups, rides are not referred to by their real names wherever possible, either because people can't be bothered saying the full name, or to mock an unpopular ride.

A list of common alternative names is shown below, names that are strictly abbreviations are not included:

'''[[Alton Towers]]:'''
*Enterprise - Brenda
*Nemesis: Sub-Terra - Terry
*[[Blade]] - Bland
*[[Nemesis|Nemesis]] - Nemmy
*[[Oblivion|Oblivion]] - Blivvy, BOLIVIA (shouted)
*[[Ripsaw|Ripsaw]] - Rippy
*[[Sharkbait_Reef|Sharkbait Reef]] - Sharkbait Beef
*[[Sonic_Spinball|Sonic Spinball]] - Chronic Sh*tball, Sonic Shamballs, Stupid Shitball, Sonic Spinfail
*[[Submission]] - Substandard
*[[Th13teen|Th13teen]] - ThFAILteen, Breakdown: The Ride
*[[Air]] - F<nowiki>air</nowiki>: The Ride, Concrete: The Ride, Breakdown: The Ride, Annoyance Is Regular, Aerodynamic Infernal Rage, Another Indecent Ride

'''[[Chessington World of Adventures]]:'''

*[[Bubbleworks|Bubbleworks]] - Michael Bubleworks, Troubleworks
*Dragon Falls - Rascist Falls
*[[Rameses_Revenge|Rameses Revenge]] - Rammy, Rippy Ripoff
*[[Vampire|Vampire]] - CAMPire

'''[[Disney|Disneyland]]'''

*Space Mountain - Sparse Mountain, Brace Mountain

'''[[Drayton Manor]]:'''
*Apocalypse - Poccy
*G-Force - G-Farce
*Splash Canyon - Syphilis Canyon

'''[[Europa Park]]:'''
*''(Otherwise known as OYROPA)''
*Schneeflocken - '''[[Bench|BENCH]]'''!!
*Piccolo Mondo - Luxury bench
*Silverstar - Silvia
*Matterhorn blitz - Matterhorn sh*ts
*Bluefire - Bluefy

'''[[Flamingoland]]'''
*''(Otherwise known as Flamingobland or Mingoland)''
*Velocity - Veloshitty

'''[[Legoland]]'''
*''(Otherwise known as Legobland)''
*Viking River Rapids - Ghetto Splash

'''[[Camelot]]'''
*''(Otherwise known as Cum-a-lot)''

'''[[Lightwater Valley]]'''
*''(Otherwise known as Sh*tewater Valley or Fappwater Valley)''
*[[The Ultimate]] - [[Ultimache|UltimACHE]]
*Whirlwind - Top Buzz 2

'''[[Mandyland|Pleasure Beach Blackpool]]:'''
*''(Otherwise known as Mandyland)''
*The Arena - Iceland.co.uk, Mandy's Grotto
*Ghost Train - Trauma Train, Ghost Towers
*Grand National - The Nash
*Impossible - Impossible it's still here!, Boring Swing
*Infusion - Intrusion, Traumafusion, Confusion, Loggie's Killer
*River Caves - Racist Caves
*[[Rollercoaster (PBB)|Nickelodeon Streak]] - Rola-Cola, Streaker, 'The Orange One'
*Steeplechase - Sleep-lechase
*[[Valhalla]] - Valerie
*Wild Mouse - Bone-Crusher, The Bruiser

'''[[Thorpe Park]]:'''
*''(Otherwise known as THORPE PARK!!!!!!!)''
*[[Colossus|Colossus]] - Colossucks, Lolossus, For-the-lossus
*[[Nemesis Inferno]] - <nowiki>Nemesis</nowiki> Inferior, Nymphferior, Ninfailo
*Rumba Rapids - Brapids, Drybina Slumba Cr*pids
*[[Lost City|Rush]] - Thrush
*[[Lost City|Samurai]] - Scamurai, Shamurai
*[[SAW:_The_Ride|SAW: The Ride]] - Snore: The Ride, SORE: The Ride
*Slammer - Schwammer, Schwammy Wammy, Clamper
*Storm Surge - Storm Drain
*[[Lost City|Vortex]] - Bore-tex
*[[X:\No Way Out]] - X:\WTF

==Noob Names==

In addition to above, there are a number of common mistakes made by theme park [[Noobs|noobs]] regarding ride names. Some of the more frequent include:

*[[Sonic_Spinball|Sonic Spinball]] - Pinball Wizzard
*[[Squirrel_Nutty|Squirrel Nutty]] - Squirrel Nutkin
*[[Duel]] - Haunted House, Target Zone
*[[The Flume]] - Log Flume
*[ride name] - The [ride name] *exception to this being anyone saying "The Blade", which is just uber-cool, or anything else that actually does have 'the' in the name.
*<nowiki>Nemesis Inferno - Nemesis</nowiki>. This is '''clearly unacceptable'''. There is only one <nowiki>Nemesis</nowiki>, and it lives in Staffordshire.

[[Category: Meet Memes]]

Valhalla

2011-12-15T00:47:23Z

Wardbjuk:

[[File:valhallawatervortex.png|400px|thumb|right|Those who dare to ride Valerie speak much of its wetness.]]

'''Valhalla''' (colloquially known as ''[[Alternative ride names|Valerie]]'' or ''Mandy's Warehouse O'Water'') is a corrugated warehouse taken from a nearby industrial estate in [[Blackpool]], and placed within the confines of [[Mandyland]] Resort. Noticing their current Log Flume was falling apart, the park decided to design the wettest ride in the country, and open it in the wettest county of England. This is how Valhalla came about. The ride is well within the bounds of [[Acceptable Wetness|Unacceptable Wetness]].

Rumoured to make a profit on rain mac sales alone, this ride has two purposes - to wet you to the skin, and to break the record for the world's first unreliable warehouse flume. Guinness have been unable to verify the record, however it is a commonplace fact that Valhalla regularly breaks down due to water getting into the sensors.. (Who would have thought it on a water ride, eh?)
Should you survive the ride without [[chavs]] chucking ice at you in the snow room or being burnt alive in the fire room, you may wish to purchase an on-ride photo, which captures riders at the most important point of your experience - the end.

At the end of 2011, the rocky front was removed from Valerie, revealing a concealed clothing factory making quality T-Shirts for the park's many outlets. It was heavily rumoured in enthusiast circles that the Valhalla's flume system merely acted as a cost-effective washing machine before the shirts made their way to the park's numerous souvenir shops.

[[Category:Mandyland]]

Valhalla

2011-12-15T00:44:54Z

Wardbjuk:

File:Valhallawatervortex.png

2011-12-15T00:43:52Z

Wardbjuk:

Valhalla

2011-12-15T00:39:26Z

Wardbjuk:

[[File:watervortex.jpg.png|400px|thumb|right|Those who dare to ride Valerie speak much of its wetness.]]

'''Valhalla''' (colloquially known as ''[[Alternative ride names|Valerie]]'' or ''Mandy's Warehouse O'Water'') is a corrugated warehouse taken from a nearby industrial estate in [[Blackpool]], and placed within the confines of [[Mandyland]] Resort. Noticing their current Log Flume was falling apart, the park decided to design the wettest ride in the country, and open it in the wettest county of England. This is how Valhalla came about. The ride is well within the bounds of [[Acceptable Wetness|Unacceptable Wetness]].

Rumoured to make a profit on rain mac sales alone, this ride has two purposes - to wet you to the skin, and to break the record for the world's first unreliable warehouse flume. Guinness have been unable to verify the record, however it is a commonplace fact that Valhalla regularly breaks down due to water getting into the sensors.. (Who would have thought it on a water ride, eh?)
Should you survive the ride without [[chavs]] chucking ice at you in the snow room or being burnt alive in the fire room, you may wish to purchase an on-ride photo, which captures riders at the most important point of your experience - the end.

[[Category:Mandyland]]

File:Watervortex.jpg.png

2011-12-15T00:33:42Z

Wardbjuk: Valhalla's Water Vortex

Valhalla's Water Vortex