Closed Season - Revision history

Jordan: category

2013-03-05T22:41:25Z

Martinjw at 21:37, 26 February 2013

2013-02-26T21:37:49Z

Sammy: CLOSED!

2010-11-24T22:46:16Z

CLOSED!

Joel: I promise. No more edits. I will click preview and re-read properly now.

2010-11-24T18:45:27Z

I promise. No more edits. I will click preview and re-read properly now.

Joel: Gah, broken link fail, and the EU parks bit didnt make sense good.

2010-11-24T18:20:44Z

Gah, broken link fail, and the EU parks bit didnt make sense good.

Joel: Tidy up, added a few bits and expanded some of the rest. I promise not to add any more now.

2010-11-24T18:17:45Z

Tidy up, added a few bits and expanded some of the rest. I promise not to add any more now.

DanDan: PMSL. Best article to wake up to, ever. Just added article links and Theme Park Withdrawal as the consequence of closed season.

2010-11-24T11:56:35Z

PMSL. Best article to wake up to, ever. Just added article links and Theme Park Withdrawal as the consequence of closed season.

Joel: I like strikethrough.

2010-11-24T01:30:12Z

I like strikethrough.

Joel: Spelling fail again.

2010-11-24T01:27:50Z

Spelling fail again.

Joel: Trying to improve poor humour slightly and changing poor grammars etc innit

2010-11-24T01:27:17Z

Trying to improve poor humour slightly and changing poor grammars etc innit

← Older revision		Revision as of 22:41, 5 March 2013
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	== See also ==		== See also ==
	* [[Theme Park Withdrawal]] - The enthusiast's most belligerent disease during the dreaded closed season.		* [[Theme Park Withdrawal]] - The enthusiast's most belligerent disease during the dreaded closed season.
		+
		+	[[Category:TST Induction]]

@@ Line 24: / Line 24: @@
 == Closed Season Clichés ==
-It is also quite possible to diagnose ''Closed Season Fever'' by looking at the [[TowersTimes]] discussion forums, and taking note of the topics and discussions that are created.
+It is also quite possible to diagnose ''Closed Season Fever'' by looking at the TowersStreet discussion forums, and taking note of the topics and discussions that are created.
 Such closed season fevers also bring about closed season clichés, and the symptoms include topics about:

← Older revision		Revision as of 22:46, 24 November 2010
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−	[[File:Closed_entrance_sign.jpg\|thumb\|right\|250px\|Every enthusiasts worst nightmare. The closed sign.]]	+	[[File:Closed_entrance_sign.jpg\|thumb\|right\|250px\|Every enthusiasts worst nightmare. The [[closed]] sign.]]
	The 'closed season' is the veritable period which usually, in the United Kingdom, begins around the beginning of November, and ceases around Easter, when most theme parks re-open for business.		The 'closed season' is the veritable period which usually, in the United Kingdom, begins around the beginning of November, and ceases around Easter, when most theme parks re-open for business.

@@ Line 1: / Line 1: @@
 The 'closed season' is the veritable period which usually, in the United Kingdom, begins around the beginning of November, and ceases around Easter, when most theme parks re-open for business.
 == Origins ==
-Many people have debated as to why UK theme parks insist upon closing their brass iron gates for upto 6 months of the year, but nobody has ever come close to the truth. Many falsely believe that it is because theme park revenues are too low to continue operating in the winter period, and some die hard fans even believe it is so that theme parks can actually use the time to carry out maintenance and repair work on rides. We say this is all rubbish, and far too practical thinking.
+Many people have debated for years as to why UK theme parks insist upon closing their brass iron gates for upto 6 months of the year, but nobody has ever come close to the truth. Many falsely believe that it is because theme park revenues are too low to continue operating profitably in the winter period, and some die hard fans even believe it is so that theme parks can actually use the time to carry out maintenance and repair work on rides. Some manufacturers, like [[Intamin|Intaminge]], even try to blame it on the fact that their coasters can not operate in the antartic conditions of the UK winters.  We say this is all rubbish, and far too much like practical thinking.
-Those who actively practise the religion of [[Wardmas|Wardleyism]], and pretty much everyone else who has ''any'' common sense know and proclaim forth that [[God]] himself created the closed season, punishing them for their twisted 'coaster sins over the previous 6 months, but then often kindly rewarding them in the new open season with the birth of a new <s>hand crafted</s> <s>[[B and M|B & M]]</s> Wardley machine.
+Those who actively practise the religion of [[Wardmas|Wardleyism]] (and pretty much everyone else who has ''any'' common sense) know and proclaim forth that [[God]] himself created the closed season, punishing them for their twisted 'coaster sins over the previous 6 months, but then often kindly rewarding them in the new open season with the birth of a new <s>hand crafted</s> <s>[[B and M|B & M]]</s> Wardley machine.
 == Symptoms ==
@@ Line 18: / Line 18: @@
 With 96.983241262519% of enthusiasts being <s>stupid</s> <s>rich</s> fortunate enough to own a [[Merlin Entertainments Ltd|Merlin Annual Pass]], a large proportion of said enthusiasts can counter-act the symptoms by resorting to attending a portfolio of (usually avoided) Merlin <s>shoddy</s> midway attractions to get a 'Merlin fix', such as The Merlin Entertainments SeaLife Centres nationwide, The Merlin Entertainments Legoland Discovery Centre, The Merlin Entertainments [[Warwick Castle]], The Merlin Entertainments Madame Tussauds, Various The Merlin Entertainments Dungeons, and of course not forgetting The Merlin Entertainments Ridiculously Long Named London Eye.
-Often, many enthusiasts will conduct expensive pilgrimages to other European theme parks, such as Di$n£yland Resort, France or Mack Land (''aka Europa Park'') and Phannyland in Germany. These theme parks unfortunately do not recognise or even know of the cult of [[Wardmas|Wardleyism]], and thus do not respect the divine request from his Lordship to cease operations over the winter period.
+Often, many enthusiasts will conduct expensive pilgrimages to other European theme parks, such as [[Disney|Di$n£yland Resort]], France or [[Europa Park|Mack Land (''aka Europa Park'')]] and Phannyland in Germany. These theme parks unfortunately do not recognise or even know of the cult of [[Wardmas|Wardleyism]], and thus do not respect the divine request from his Lordship to cease operations over the winter period.
 If all else fails, and as a last resort, enthusiasts often find themselves huddling for warmth and comfort at their nearest cinema, bowling alley or Nando's restaurant in a last ditch attempt to prevent the onset of CSF and ultimately insanity.

@@ Line 18: / Line 18: @@
 With 96.983241262519% of enthusiasts being <s>stupid</s> <s>rich</s> fortunate enough to own a [[Merlin Entertainments Ltd|Merlin Annual Pass]], a large proportion of said enthusiasts can counter-act the symptoms by resorting to attending a portfolio of (usually avoided) Merlin <s>shoddy</s> midway attractions to get a 'Merlin fix', such as The Merlin Entertainments SeaLife Centres nationwide, The Merlin Entertainments Legoland Discovery Centre, The Merlin Entertainments [[Warwick Castle]], The Merlin Entertainments Madame Tussauds, Various The Merlin Entertainments Dungeons, and of course not forgetting The Merlin Entertainments Ridiculously Long Named London Eye.
-Often, many enthusiasts will conduct expensive pilgrimages to other European theme parks, such as Europa Park and Phannyland in Germany. These theme parks unfortunately do not recognise or even know of the cult of
+Often, many enthusiasts will conduct expensive pilgrimages to other European theme parks, such as Di$n£yland Resort, France or Mack Land (''aka Europa Park'') and Phannyland in Germany. These theme parks unfortunately do not recognise or even know of the cult of [[Wardmas|Wardleyism]], and thus do not respect the divine request from his Lordship to cease operations over the winter period.
-[[Wardmas||Wardleyism]], and thus do not respect the divine request from his Lordship to cease operations over the winter period.
 If all else fails, and as a last resort, enthusiasts often find themselves huddling for warmth and comfort at their nearest cinema, bowling alley or Nando's restaurant in a last ditch attempt to prevent the onset of CSF and ultimately insanity.

@@ Line 1: / Line 1: @@
 The 'closed season' is the veritable period which usually, in the United Kingdom, begins around the beginning of November, and ceases around Easter, when most theme parks re-open for business.
-Unfortunately, this period of closure has a negative effect on enthusiasts of said theme parks, with severe withdrawl symptoms often reported, including vomiting and diarrhoea (nicknamed ''CSF'', or ''Closed Season Fever'').
+== Origins ==
 With 96.983241262519% of enthusiasts being <s>stupid</s> <s>rich</s> fortunate enough to own a [[Merlin Entertainments Ltd|Merlin Annual Pass]], a large proportion of said enthusiasts can counter-act the symptoms by resorting to attending a portfolio of (usually avoided) Merlin <s>shoddy</s> midway attractions to get a 'Merlin fix', such as The Merlin Entertainments SeaLife Centres nationwide, The Merlin Entertainments Legoland Discovery Centre, The Merlin Entertainments [[Warwick Castle]], The Merlin Entertainments Madame Tussauds, Various The Merlin Entertainments Dungeons, and of course not forgetting The Merlin Entertainments Ridiculously Long Named London Eye.
-If all else fails, enthusiasts often find themselves huddling for warmth and comfort at their nearest cinema, bowling alley or Nando's restaurant in a last ditch attempt to prevent the onset of CSF and ultimately insanity.
+Often, many enthusiasts will conduct expensive pilgrimages to other European theme parks, such as Europa Park and Phannyland in Germany. These theme parks unfortunately do not recognise or even know of the cult of
 == Closed Season Clichés ==
-It is also quite possible to see the effects of closed season fever by looking at the [[TowersTimes]] forums, and taking note of the topics and discussions that are created.
+It is also quite possible to diagnose ''Closed Season Fever'' by looking at the [[TowersTimes]] discussion forums, and taking note of the topics and discussions that are created.
-Such closed season fevers also bring closed season clichés, and the symptoms include topics about:
+Such closed season fevers also bring about closed season clichés, and the symptoms include topics about:
-* Rubbish bins, and rubbish bin theming
+* Rubbish bins - and the lack of them
-* The [[Air]] tunnel, and lack of theming
+* The [[Air]] tunnel - and lack of theming
-* Queue line boards, and the lack of working
+* Queue line boards - and the lack of working
-* The [[Nemesis]] puddle, and its lack of disappearance
+* The [[Nemesis]] puddle - and its lack of disappearance
-* Hand Dryers, and their lack of warmth
+* Toilets - and their lack of magic in general
-* Taps, and their lack of the ability to turn off/on/be warm
+* Hand Dryers - and their lack of warmth
-If you spot these topics upon the midst of other random discussion on the forum, it is safe to say that closed season fever has indeed set in, and now would be a good time to evacuate the premises before it continues to spread to yourself.
+If you spot these topics upon the midst of other random discussion on the forum, it is safe to say that ''Closed Season Fever'' has indeed set in, and now would be a good time to evacuate the premises before it continues to spread to yourself.
 '''RUN!'''
-''Also see: [[Theme Park Withdrawal]], the enthusiast's most belligerent disease during the dreaded closed season.''
+== See also ==

@@ Line 5: / Line 5: @@
 Unfortunately, this period of closure has a negative effect on enthusiasts of said theme parks, with severe withdrawl symptoms often reported, including vomiting and diarrhoea (nicknamed ''CSF'', or ''Closed Season Fever'').
-With 96.983241262519% of enthusiasts being fortunate enough to own a Merlin Annual Pass, a large proportion of said enthusiasts can counter-act the symptoms by resorting to attending a portfolio of (usually avoided) Merlin <s>shoddy</s> midway attractions to get a 'Merlin fix', such as The Merlin Entertainments SeaLife Centres nationwide, The Merlin Entertainments LegoLand Discovery Centre, The Merlin Entertainments Warwick Castle, The Merlin Entertainments Madame Tussauds, Various The Merlin Entertainments Dungeons, and of course not forgetting The Merlin Entertainments Ridiculously Long Named London Eye.
+With 96.983241262519% of enthusiasts being <s>stupid</s> <s>rich</s> fortunate enough to own a Merlin Annual Pass, a large proportion of said enthusiasts can counter-act the symptoms by resorting to attending a portfolio of (usually avoided) Merlin <s>shoddy</s> midway attractions to get a 'Merlin fix', such as The Merlin Entertainments SeaLife Centres nationwide, The Merlin Entertainments LegoLand Discovery Centre, The Merlin Entertainments Warwick Castle, The Merlin Entertainments Madame Tussauds, Various The Merlin Entertainments Dungeons, and of course not forgetting The Merlin Entertainments Ridiculously Long Named London Eye.
 If all else fails, enthusiasts often find themselves huddling for warmth and comfort at their nearest cinema, bowling alley or Nando's restaurant in a last ditch attempt to prevent the onset of CSF and ultimately insanity.

@@ Line 3: / Line 3: @@
 Many people have debated as to why UK theme parks insist upon closing their brass iron gates for upto 6 months of the year, but nobody has ever come close to the truth (which is, of course, that [[God]] himself created the closed season so that he may enjoy the suffering inflicted upon his <s>minions</s> followers).
-Unfortunately, this period of closure has a negative effect on enthusiasts of said theme parks, with severe withdrawl symptoms often reported, including vomiting and diarrhoea (nicknamed ''CSF'', or ''Closed Season Fever''). With 96.983241262519% of enthusiasts being fortunate enough to own a Merlin Annual Pass, a large proportion of said enthusiasts can counter-act the symptoms by resorting to attending a portfolio of (usually avoided) Merlin <s>shoddy</s> midway attractions to get a 'Merlin fix', such as The Merlin Entertainments SeaLife Centres nationwide, The Merlin Entertainments LegoLand Discovery Centre, The Merlin Enterainments Warwick Castle, The Merlin Entertainments Madame Tussauds, Various The Merlin Entertainments Dungeons, and of course not forgetting The Merlin Entertainments Ridiculously Long Named London Eye.
+Unfortunately, this period of closure has a negative effect on enthusiasts of said theme parks, with severe withdrawl symptoms often reported, including vomiting and diarrhoea (nicknamed ''CSF'', or ''Closed Season Fever'').
 If all else fails, enthusiasts often find themselves huddling for warmth and comfort at their nearest cinema, bowling alley or Nando's restaurant in a last ditch attempt to prevent the onset of CSF and ultimately insanity.