Flamingo Land - Revision history

Jonathan at 23:46, 26 February 2013

2013-02-26T23:46:03Z

Mikeroller: /* Rollercoasters */

2012-03-31T14:05:31Z

‎Rollercoasters

DanDan: /* Family Rides / renamed, gah. Oh and alphabetised.

2010-12-14T10:49:16Z

‎Family Rides: *renamed, gah. Oh and alphabetised.

DanDan: /* Flat Rides */ Remained Thrills, keeping in with traditional Wiki layout.

2010-12-14T10:47:46Z

‎Flat Rides: Remained Thrills, keeping in with traditional Wiki layout.

Rct3wild at 01:16, 14 December 2010

2010-12-14T01:16:17Z

Rct3wild at 21:11, 13 December 2010

2010-12-13T21:11:57Z

Rct3wild at 21:01, 13 December 2010

2010-12-13T21:01:53Z

Rct3wild: Changed everything up to Family Rides; eventually going to add a "past rides" section.

2010-12-13T21:00:25Z

Changed everything up to Family Rides; eventually going to add a "past rides" section.

Cheese: /* Rollercoasters */ Done. The. Link. YAY!

2010-12-13T12:41:23Z

‎Rollercoasters: Done. The. Link. YAY!

James6: /* Misc */

2010-12-09T22:45:36Z

‎Misc

@@ Line 10: / Line 10: @@
 *Mumbo Jumbo - A (100% non-cloned) S&S El Loco, with a record-breaking 112-degree drop!
-*[[Velocity]] - A custom-designed Vekoma Motorbike launch coaster, with a launch of 54mph in 2.5 seconds, making it the fastest of it's kind in the world. A well-known fact is that the restraints resemble a kind of genital garlic-press.
+*[[Velocity]] - A custom-designed Vekoma Motorbike launch coaster, with a launch of 54mph in 2.5 seconds, making it the fastest of its kind in the world. A well-known fact is that the restraints resemble a kind of genital garlic-press.
 *Wild Mouse - A Maurer Sohne Wild Mouse. Rumour has it that blades are regularly attached to the sides of each car, to allow for the trimming of neighbouring foliage.

← Older revision		Revision as of 14:05, 31 March 2012
Line 5:		Line 5:
	=== Rollercoasters ===		=== Rollercoasters ===

−	*[[Corkscrew]] - A Vekoma Pigeon-Killer 5000. It looks like a clone of Alton Towers' Corkscrew, but it wasn't and ''never was''. It was the first rollercoaster in <s>the country</s> Flamingoland to invert people twice.

	*[[Kumali]] - A Vekoma SLC with an almost-custom layout. Just like the one in China infact... but it isn't a clone.		*[[Kumali]] - A Vekoma SLC with an almost-custom layout. Just like the one in China infact... but it isn't a clone.

@@ Line 40: / Line 40: @@
 *Balloon Race - A whirly... thing.
 *Chinese Dragon - A typical 'caterpillar' ride. But with dragons. Not caterpillars. DRAGONS, I TELL YOU!
 *Runaway Train - In no way themed and in no way impressive, the Runaway Train is as clever and inspired as its title.
 === Kids Rides ===

@@ Line 15: / Line 15: @@
 *Wild Mouse - A Maurer Sohne Wild Mouse. Rumour has it that blades are regularly attached to the sides of each car, to allow for the trimming of neighbouring foliage.
-=== Flat Rides ===
+=== Thrill Rides ===
-*Cliff-Hanger- An S&S drop tower, the tallest of it's kind anywhere! The centrepiece of Seaside Adventure; once themed to a giant lighthouse, a single complaint from a man 15 miles away ensured that Flamingoland's first proper attempt at themeing was swiftly removed and never spoken of again.
+* Cliff-Hanger- An S&S drop tower, the tallest of it's kind anywhere! The centrepiece of Seaside Adventure; once themed to a giant lighthouse, a single complaint from a man 15 miles away ensured that Flamingoland's first proper attempt at themeing was swiftly removed and never spoken of again.
-*Flip Flop - What appears to be a gyro-swing ride is actually one of the park's tittilating fairground games; if you can fling your shoe into Splash Battle's volcano you just might win a prize!
+* Flip Flop - What appears to be a gyro-swing ride is actually one of the park's tittilating fairground games; if you can fling your shoe into Splash Battle's volcano you just might win a prize!
-*Sky Flyer - The park's flagship attraction, which pulls in people as far afield as Flip Flop, and boasts queue times of up to 19 seconds, or however long it takes you to walk up the steps and find a seat.
+* Sky Flyer - The park's flagship attraction, which pulls in people as far afield as Flip Flop, and boasts queue times of up to 19 seconds, or however long it takes you to walk up the steps and find a seat.
-*Navigator - Like [[Kobra]], but with less [[faff]], as it just gets on with its job without a big deal.
+* Navigator - Like [[Kobra]], but with less [[faff]], as it just gets on with its job without a big deal.
-*Voodoo - Carrying on the theme of an African Settlement in the freezing wilderness of Yorkshire, Voodoo is a Pirate Ship with less style than the [[Black Buccaneer]] or [[Blade]].
+* Voodoo - Carrying on the theme of an African Settlement in the freezing wilderness of Yorkshire, Voodoo is a Pirate Ship with less style than the [[Black Buccaneer]] or [[Blade]].
-*Wave Swinger - Like the [[Twirling Toadstool]], Wave Swinger is a basic, well, Wave Swinger. However it is less enjoyable and threatening than the bullying monster at [[Alton Towers]]
+* Wave Swinger - Like the [[Twirling Toadstool]], Wave Swinger is a basic, well, Wave Swinger. However it is less enjoyable and threatening than the alleged bullying monster at [[Alton Towers]].
 === Water Rides ===

@@ Line 22: / Line 22: @@
 *Sky Flyer - The park's flagship attraction, which pulls in people as far afield as Flip Flop, and boasts queue times of up to 19 seconds, or however long it takes you to walk up the steps and find a seat.
 === Water Rides ===
@@ Line 36: / Line 42: @@
 *Mischeif Mansion - One of the most laughable attempts at a ghost train ever made. Highly likely that guns can be expected soon.
 *Wagon Wheels - A Wild-West themed Ferris wheel that sticks out from it's surroundings like a sore thumb. Strangely terrifying, it induces high levels of stress upon visitors.
 *Chinese Dragon - A typical 'caterpillar' ride. But with dragons. Not caterpillars. DRAGONS, I TELL YOU!
@@ Line 69: / Line 67: @@
 *Pink ELephants - Basic Carousel.
-*Kiddies Mini Roundabout - Basic Carousel.(Can you see a pattern emerging?)
+*Kiddies Mini Roundabout - Basic Carousel.
 *Honey Bears - Basic Carousel.
@@ Line 77: / Line 75: @@
 *Jungle Carousel - Basic Carousel.
-*Flying Clowns - '''Freaky''' Carousel.
+*Flying Clowns - '''Freaky'''
-*Helioys - Control your own 'helicopter' for 30 seconds. Queue time approximately 50 minutes.
+*Helioys - Control your own 'helicopter' for 30 seconds.
-*[[Frog Hopper]] - Nearly as awesome and violent as the one at [[Alton Towers]]. But not quite.
+*[[Frog Hopper]] - Nearly as awesome and violent as the one at [[Alton Towers]]... but not quite.
-*Go Gator! - [[Pinfari]]. No More to be said.
+*Go Gator! - Awesome. No more to be said.
 === Misc ===

@@ Line 7: / Line 7: @@
 *[[Corkscrew]] - A Vekoma Pigeon-Killer 5000. It looks like a clone of Alton Towers' Corkscrew, but it wasn't and ''never was''. It was the first rollercoaster in <s>the country</s> Flamingoland to invert people twice.
-*[[Kumali]] - A Vekoma SLC with an almost-custom layout, just like the one in China infact, but it too isn't a clone.
+*[[Kumali]] - A Vekoma SLC with an almost-custom layout. Just like the one in China infact... but it isn't a clone.
 *Mumbo Jumbo - A (100% non-cloned) S&S El Loco, with a record-breaking 112-degree drop!

@@ Line 1: / Line 1: @@
-'''Flamingo Land''' is a theme park and zoo dumped in the middle of North Yorkshire. It is advised that the mentally able do not visit here on pain of death.
+'''Flamingo Land''' is a family-run theme park and zoo, located in officially the flattest part of North Yorkshire. The word "flamingo" is derived from the latin ''flamingus mingus'', which we now know to mean "gypsy".
-== Rides and Attractions ==
+== Current Rides and Attractions ==
 === Rollercoasters ===
-*<s>Not the real</s> [[Corkscrew]] - A cheap way for [[Alton Towers]] fans to regain that feeling.
+*[[Corkscrew]] - A Vekoma Pigeon-Killer 5000. It looks like a clone of Alton Towers' Corkscrew, but it wasn't and ''never was''. It was the first rollercoaster in <s>the country</s> Flamingoland to invert people twice.
-*[[Kumali]] - A yellow monstrosity ruining the countryside views, and was once struck by lightning.
+*[[Kumali]] - A Vekoma SLC with an almost-custom layout, just like the one in China infact, but it too isn't a clone.
-*Mumbo Jumbo - Held the record of World's steepest drop, until people realised it was crap and a new, better ride was built in France.
+*Mumbo Jumbo - A (100% non-cloned) S&S El Loco, with a record-breaking 112-degree drop!
-*[[Velocity]] - Like [[Rita]], but on a bike, and not as good.
+*[[Velocity]] - A custom-designed Vekoma Motorbike launch coaster, with a launch of 54mph in 2.5 seconds, making it the fastest of it's kind in the world. A well-known fact is that the restraints resemble a kind of genital garlic-press.
-=== Thrill Rides ===
+*Wild Mouse - A Maurer Sohne Wild Mouse. Rumour has it that blades are regularly attached to the sides of each car, to allow for the trimming of neighbouring foliage.
-*Cliff-Hanger- Lighthouse themed drop tower, that makes [[Alton Towers]] very jealous.
+=== Flat Rides ===
-*Flip Flop - Basic Insanity ride with every effort to get you cold, wet, and throughly pissed off.
+*Cliff-Hanger- An S&S drop tower, the tallest of it's kind anywhere! The centrepiece of Seaside Adventure; once themed to a giant lighthouse, a single complaint from a man 15 miles away ensured that Flamingoland's first proper attempt at themeing was swiftly removed and never spoked of again.
-*Sky Flyer - Possibly the most painful and poorly themed ride 'oop North'.
+*Flip Flop - What appears to be a gyro-swing ride is actually one of the park's tittilating fairground games; if you can fling your shoe into Splash Battle's volcano you just might win a prize!
 === Water Rides ===
-*Lost River Ride - Themed as an African Boat Journey, yet somhehow in the middle of North Yorkshire.
+*Lost River Ride - A gentle float through the serene atmosphere of the zoo... ahhhh... Until the BACK-BREAKING DROP OF DEATH into the DNA-altering pool of despair!!
-−
-*Splash Battle - Do not be surprised by the tame appearance. You get wet. Very wet.
-−
-*Pedaloes - The name says it all; you get on, you pedal, you sink. Produces high levels of [[faff]].
 === Family Rides ===

@@ Line 92: / Line 92: @@
 *Dodgems - No tacky, fairground prizes for guessing what this ride is. However you can win some on the ridiculously over priced stalls nearby.
-*Cycle Monorail - Cycle along a track, in the air. Excitement.
+*Cycle Monorail - Cycle along attempting to shunt the bike in front of you. First bike to five shunts wins.
 *Fun Play Areas - Use your own imagination.