The Smiler - Revision history

Danny at 13:10, 20 February 2014

2014-02-20T13:10:02Z

BigAl at 06:42, 14 August 2013

2013-08-14T06:42:24Z

DiogoJ42: Removed mention of member name and other website.

2013-08-14T00:43:20Z

Removed mention of member name and other website.

BigAl at 13:32, 13 August 2013

2013-08-13T13:32:09Z

Andrew at 12:49, 13 August 2013

2013-08-13T12:49:40Z

Andrew at 12:44, 13 August 2013

2013-08-13T12:44:49Z

Jordan: manufacturer

2013-03-11T22:09:55Z

manufacturer

Jordan: tidy up :)

2013-03-11T22:07:54Z

tidy up :)

Jordan: Jordan moved page Secret Weapon 7 to The Smiler

2013-03-11T22:05:34Z

Jordan moved page Secret Weapon 7 to The Smiler

Jordan: add ride category

2013-02-27T23:26:31Z

add ride category

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-'''The Smiler''' (previously known as '''Secret Weapon 7''' and commonly abbreviated to '''<nowiki>SW7</nowiki>''') will be the latest in the long line of over-hyped coasters at [[Alton Towers]], designed by the [[Marketing Department]]. Contrary to previous rumours, the ride did not turn out to be the world's first stand-up wooden babycoaster, including a FREE stay-down breakfast. ''The Smiler'' might open sometime in 2013, however delays are being strategically planned so that the ride can indeed be opened as new for [[2014]].
+'''The Smiler''' (previously known as '''Secret Weapon 7''' and commonly abbreviated to '''<nowiki>SW7</nowiki>''') is the latest in the long line of over-hyped coasters at [[Alton Towers]], designed by the [[Marketing Department]]. Contrary to previous rumours, the ride did not turn out to be the world's first stand-up wooden babycoaster, including a FREE stay-down breakfast. It was rumoured that ''The Smiler'' might open sometime in 2013, however delays were being strategically planned so that the ride could indeed be opened as new for [[2014]].
-The [[rollercoaster]] will be manufactured by <s>[[Pinfari]]</s> [[Gerstlauer]] (following Vekoma being deemed as too expensive), and feature <s>8</s> 14 inversions, hence the rumoured name, [[Th13teen|FOU13TEEN]]. You will have to sign a form declaring that you are not a [[Chav|chav]] in order to be allowed to ride; all chavs (along with [[Trolls|trolls]], [[Noobs|noobs]], and people who don't write [[Hex - The Legend of the Towers]] out in full) will be sent to [[Rita|Rita]] instead, to ride her like the whore she is.
+The [[rollercoaster]] was be manufactured by <s>[[Pinfari]]</s> [[Gerstlauer]] (following Vekoma being deemed as too expensive), and features <s>8</s> 14 inversions, hence the lesser known name, [[Th13teen|FOU13TEEN]]. You have to sign a form declaring that you are not a [[Chav|chav]] in order to be allowed to ride; all chavs (along with [[Trolls|trolls]], [[Noobs|noobs]], and people who don't write [[Hex - The Legend of the Towers]] out in full) who will be sent to [[Rita|Rita]] instead, to ride her like the whore she is.
-In addition to this, additional rumours arose on the <nowiki>Alton Towers</nowiki> [[Faffbook|Facebook]] page that <nowiki>SW7</nowiki> will be named "THE FLYING KINKONATOR" will be built over <nowiki>Hex</nowiki> in a few years.
+In addition to this, additional rumours arose on the <nowiki>Alton Towers</nowiki> [[Faffbook|Facebook]] page that <nowiki>SW7</nowiki> would be named "THE FLYING KINKONATOR" and would be built over <nowiki>Hex</nowiki> in a few years.
-The ride will be themed on Stephen King's IT, specifically Pennywise the Dancing Clown. Staff will sell Fasttracks while in costume and character of Pennywise, IE) "don'tcha wanna Fastrack? Don'tcha wannit? Don'tcha WANNIT!?, DON'TCHA WANNIT!!??" but they will not be permitted to bare fangs until the Scarefest fortnight.
+The ride was previously tipped to be themed on Stephen King's IT, specifically Pennywise the Dancing Clown. Staff would sell Fasttracks while in costume and character of Pennywise, IE) "don'tcha wanna Fastrack? Don'tcha wannit? Don'tcha WANNIT!?, DON'TCHA WANNIT!!??" but they would not be permitted to bare fangs until the Scarefest fortnight.
-The ride opened in March... Erm, April... Okay, mid-May. Oh fine, it opened on the final day of May. Then it broke down some more due to the vast amount stickers in the queue. A bolt also fell from the ride once and apparently it hit someone. That was a load of nonsense you blithering idiots.
+The ride opened in March... Erm, April... Okay, mid-May. Oh fine, it opened on the final day of May. Then it broke down some more due to the vast amount stickers in the queue. The Smiler was later plagued with bad weather issues, constantly raining bolts (and occasionally wheels) onto guests and riders alike every other week.
 Aside from these issues and the vast amounts of concrete (earning it the nickname of 'Concrete: The Ride), the ride was fairly well received. This may be due to the significant amount of L3wpz, incorrectly spelled signs, YELLOW and LOUD and swirls and TVs and stickers andandandanddanananana fun (emphasis on the 'un'). Many people have said that it's better than Nemesis, just as they did when lukeSWARM opened. Nope.jpeg.

@@ Line 13: / Line 13: @@
 The Smiler does a lot of loop-de-loops as well making it the best ride eva! Well, the second best after TH13TEEN of course. The washing machine element is on a hidden siding, but the track switch will only route you to it if you REALLY believe in it. It's meant to be pretty darn fun. Pity that we all can't try it out!
-The The Smiler disciples are now a common occurrence at the park (a.k.a just "enthusiasts") and can often be found strutting around 'MoJ-Sector' like they own the place / ride, adorned in vast quantities of overpriced Smiler tat and claiming their allegiance to what is effectively just a pile of metal and concrete arranged in the shape of an attraction. The tat, much like the plumage of some birds, is often used by geeks to highlight the fact that they're single, or to show their belonging to a certain group / online community. It can also be used to scare away normal people that just want a nice day out without having their eyes burnt out of their sockets from the substantial amount of YELLOW. An excuse often used for the offense of buying some of the tat on offer is "itz 4 teh funniez", in which case you are obliged to reply with something along the lines of "it isn't funny".
+The The Smiler disciples are now a common occurrence at the park (a.k.a just "enthusiasts") and can often be found strutting around 'MoJ-Sector' like they own the place / ride, adorned in vast quantities of overpriced Smiler tat and claiming their allegiance to what is effectively just a pile of metal and concrete arranged in the shape of fun. The tat, much like the plumage of some birds, is often used by geeks to bring themselves to the attention of other geeks, or to show their belonging to a certain group / online community. It can also be used to scare away normal people that just want a nice day out without having their eyes burnt out of their sockets from the substantial amount of YELLOW. An excuse often used for the offense of buying some of the tat on offer is "itz 4 teh funniez", in which case you are obliged to reply with something along the lines of "it isn't funny".
 [[Category:Alton Towers]]
 [[Category:Ride]]

@@ Line 11: / Line 11: @@
 Aside from these issues and the vast amounts of concrete (earning it the nickname of 'Concrete: The Ride), the ride was fairly well received. This may be due to the significant amount of L3wpz, incorrectly spelled signs, YELLOW and LOUD and swirls and TVs and stickers andandandanddanananana fun (emphasis on the 'un'). Many people have said that it's better than Nemesis, just as they did when lukeSWARM opened. Nope.jpeg.
-The Smiler does a lot of loop-de-loops as well making it the best ride eva! Well, the second best after TH13TEEN of course. The washing machine only gets turned on for members of that other forum and spin_doctor and it's meant to be pretty darn fun. Pity that we all can't try it out!
+The Smiler does a lot of loop-de-loops as well making it the best ride eva! Well, the second best after TH13TEEN of course. The washing machine element is on a hidden siding, but the track switch will only route you to it if you REALLY believe in it. It's meant to be pretty darn fun. Pity that we all can't try it out!
 The The Smiler disciples are now a common occurrence at the park (a.k.a just "enthusiasts") and can often be found strutting around 'MoJ-Sector' like they own the place / ride, adorned in vast quantities of overpriced Smiler tat and claiming their allegiance to what is effectively just a pile of metal and concrete arranged in the shape of an attraction. The tat, much like the plumage of some birds, is often used by geeks to highlight the fact that they're single, or to show their belonging to a certain group / online community. It can also be used to scare away normal people that just want a nice day out without having their eyes burnt out of their sockets from the substantial amount of YELLOW. An excuse often used for the offense of buying some of the tat on offer is "itz 4 teh funniez", in which case you are obliged to reply with something along the lines of "it isn't funny".
 [[Category:Alton Towers]]
 [[Category:Ride]]

@@ Line 9: / Line 9: @@
 The ride opened in March... Erm, April... Okay, mid-May. Oh fine, it opened on the final day of May. Then it broke down some more due to the vast amount stickers in the queue. A bolt also fell from the ride once and apparently it hit someone. That was a load of nonsense you blithering idiots.
-Aside from these issues, the ride was fairly well received (aside from the vast amounts of concrete earning it the nickname of 'Concrete: The Ride)and many people were saying that it was better than Nemesis. Nope.jpeg.
+Aside from these issues and the vast amounts of concrete (earning it the nickname of 'Concrete: The Ride), the ride was fairly well received. This may be due to the significant amount of L3wpz, incorrectly spelled signs, YELLOW and LOUD and swirls and TVs and stickers andandandanddanananana fun (emphasis on the 'un'). Many people have said that it's better than Nemesis, just as they did when lukeSWARM opened. Nope.jpeg.
 The Smiler does a lot of loop-de-loops as well making it the best ride eva! Well, the second best after TH13TEEN of course. The washing machine only gets turned on for members of that other forum and spin_doctor and it's meant to be pretty darn fun. Pity that we all can't try it out!
 [[Category:Alton Towers]]
 [[Category:Ride]]

@@ Line 11: / Line 11: @@
 Aside from these issues, the ride was fairly well received (aside from the vast amounts of concrete earning it the nickname of 'Concrete: The Ride)and many people were saying that it was better than Nemesis. Nope.jpeg.
-The Smiler does a lot of loop-de-loops as well making it the best ride eva! Well, the second best after TH13TEEN of course.
+The Smiler does a lot of loop-de-loops as well making it the best ride eva! Well, the second best after TH13TEEN of course. The washing machine only gets turned on for members of that other forum and spin_doctor and it's meant to be pretty darn fun. Pity that we all can't try it out!
 [[Category:Alton Towers]]
 [[Category:Ride]]

← Older revision		Revision as of 23:26, 27 February 2013
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	[[Category:Alton Towers]]		[[Category:Alton Towers]]
		+	[[Category:Ride]]