Thirteen - Revision history

Bert2theSpark: /* Public Opinion */

2019-01-28T21:07:30Z

‎Public Opinion

Dan77: categorise

2013-02-26T20:55:32Z

categorise

Alexander at 00:33, 22 December 2012

2012-12-22T00:33:09Z

Neuros at 18:05, 21 August 2011

2011-08-21T18:05:31Z

Mrvardermier123 at 13:01, 11 May 2011

2011-05-11T13:01:31Z

Sammy: Reverted edits by Princesstowers (Talk) to last revision by Jordan

2010-12-16T20:47:51Z

Reverted edits by Princesstowers (Talk) to last revision by Jordan

Meat Pie: Replaced content with 'even wild mouse at flamingo land is more frightening than this.period. LAME LAME'

2010-12-16T20:45:42Z

Replaced content with 'even wild mouse at flamingo land is more frightening than this.period. LAME LAME'

James6: /* Technical Difficulties */ moved "See also" link to top, indented and italicised :-)

2010-12-01T17:25:09Z

‎Technical Difficulties: moved "See also" link to top, indented and italicised :-)

CoasterCrazyChris at 23:11, 21 November 2010

2010-11-21T23:11:50Z

DanDan: Reverted edits by Rowe (Talk) to last revision by John

2010-11-16T17:13:19Z

Reverted edits by Rowe (Talk) to last revision by John

@@ Line 11: / Line 11: @@
 == Public Opinion ==
-Skip forward to March 20th 2010 and Thir13irteen opened to great fanfare. Poor weather and even the presence of Jonathan Ross failed to dampen spirits. [[Alton_Towers|Alton Towers]]' marketing team (often mistaken for mythical '[[Wraiths|wraiths]]') were quick to seek out public opinion of the new ride. Opinions generally ranged from "Yeah, quite good. Bit short though" to "Yeah, I really enjoyed it... but it was a bit short". The day was overshadowed however, when [[John_Wardley|John Wardley]] was kidnapped by a crowd of 'enthusiasts', after uncharacteristically deciding to go for a walk without an armed guard. His whereabouts remain unknown...
+Skip forward to March 20th 2010 and Thir13irteen opened to great fanfare. Poor weather and even the presence of Jonathan Ross failed to dampen spirits. [[Alton_Towers|Alton Towers]]' marketing team (often mistaken for mythical '[[Wraiths|wraiths]]') were quick to seek out public opinion of the new ride. Opinions generally ranged from "Yeah, quite good. Bit short though" to "Yeah, I really enjoyed it... but it was a bit short". The day was overshadowed however, when [[John_Wardley|John Wardley]] was kidnapped by a crowd of 'enthusiasts'(aka Chris Franklin and Co.), after uncharacteristically deciding to go for a walk without an armed guard. His whereabouts remain unknown...
 The ride experience of <nowiki>Th13teen</nowiki> has been described as having "more trims than a mens' barber shop on a Saturday morning" as well as being "a rollerskate around the woods, then finishing with a Tower Of Terror imitation drop". Oxford University's top linguistic experts are still working round the clock to de-code this sentence, to establish whether the quoted person enjoyed or hated the experience of <nowiki>Th13teen</nowiki>.

← Older revision		Revision as of 20:55, 26 February 2013
Line 30:		Line 30:

	[[Category: Roller Coaster]]		[[Category: Roller Coaster]]
		+	[[Category:Alton Towers]]

@@ Line 5: / Line 5: @@
 It was constructed personally by [[John Wardley]] out of whatever scarce resources were available at the time (namely optimism, hyperbole, bits of old fluff, PVA glue and some steel that was pinched from a skip round the back of [[Drayton_Manor|Drayton Manor]] - rumour has it this was earmarked for their long rumoured '[[Blue_Fire|Blue Fire]] type thingy', plans which have consequently been put on hold while they build a hotel that approximately nobody will ever feasibly use). John then set about building what [[Alton_Towers|Alton Towers]]' [[Marketing_Department|marketing department]] dubbed, "every [[Roller_coaster|roller coaster]] you've ever dreamed of... after eating too much cheese."
-The construction of <nowiki>Th13teen</nowiki> was shrouded in mystery. So much so, that a mass grave was excavated on-site early on, to [[File:Th13teenhole.jpg|thumb|right|The mass grave used to dispose of those who threatened to reveal Thirteen's secrets]] bury anyone who dared reveal the secrets of 'SW6' to the rabid 'enthusiast community'. It was during this phase, that [[Alton Towers]] colluded with 'Team [[TT|TT]]' to keep the masses ignorant... sort of like communism. The team shamelessly accepted bribes (mostly crude polaroid snaps of [[John_Wardley|John Wardley's]] bum), in return for removing any vaguely accurate information from the boards of TTF.
+The construction of <nowiki>Th13teen</nowiki> was shrouded in mystery. So much so, that a mass grave was excavated on-site early on, to [[File:Th13teenhole.jpg|thumb|right|The mass grave used to dispose of those who threatened to reveal Thirteen's secrets]] bury anyone who dared reveal the secrets of 'SW6' to the rabid 'enthusiast community'. It was during this phase, that [[Alton Towers]] colluded with 'Team [[TT|TT]]' to keep the masses ignorant... sort of like communism. The team shamelessly accepted bribes (mostly crude polaroid snaps of [[John_Wardley|John Wardley's]] bum), in return for removing any vaguely accurate information from the boards of TST.
 Ultimately however, all original plans were scrapped when 'an old [[Castle|castle]] thing' sprung up overnight on the ground previously home to the [[Corkscrew|Corkscrew]] (the <nowiki>'castle'</nowiki> is rumoured to have fallen out of a rider's pocket back in 1987, owing to the appalling lack of bag storage available, and simply nobody had noticed until now). Engineers decided to just build a bit of track, and feed it into the '<nowiki>castle</nowiki> thing' and see what happened. As it turns out, an elevator-like device gingerly lowered riders into the world's first crypt paradoxically located on the ground floor of a structure.

@@ Line 17: / Line 17: @@
 One particularly eloquent forum goer described Thirteen thus:
-:''"this ride appears to be nothing more than the impromptu and accidental love child of The Frog Hopper and [[Runaway_Mine_Train|Runaway Mine Train]], conceived following half a can of cider during an emotional school prom, discarded to fend for itself in woodland once reserved for duelling [[Schwarzkopf]]s and cross-valley woodies and unearthed during excavations for a tombstone marking the departure of the marketing director following not so much shooting themselves in the foot, but blowing off all four limbs after climbing inside an unexploded world war II bomb and promptly being left lying in the mud, swallowing the occasional passing slug in order to survive."''
+:''"this ride appears to be nothing more than the impromptu and accidental love child of The [[Frog Hopper]] and [[Runaway_Mine_Train|Runaway Mine Train]], conceived following half a can of cider during an emotional school prom, discarded to fend for itself in woodland once reserved for duelling [[Schwarzkopf]]s and cross-valley woodies and unearthed during excavations for a tombstone marking the departure of the marketing director following not so much shooting themselves in the foot, but blowing off all four limbs after climbing inside an unexploded world war II bomb and promptly being left lying in the mud, swallowing the occasional passing slug in order to survive."''
 == Technical Difficulties ==

← Older revision		Revision as of 13:01, 11 May 2011
Line 1:		Line 1:
−	Thirteen (or <nowiki>Th13teen</nowiki>... or 13.... or Thir13teen... or ThFAILteen... or ThThirteenteen... or Fou14teen... or Da F1RtEen) is currently considered the best [[roller coaster]] in the world, just above the acclaimed [[X:\No Way Out\|X:\WTF]] at [[Thorpe_Park\|Thorpe Park]], and Gouderix at Parc Asterix in France. It's situated in the [[Dark Forest\|Intamin Forest]] at [[Alton Towers]]. It is also the hiding place of [[James]].	+	'''Thirteen''' (or <nowiki>Th13teen</nowiki>... or 13.... or Thir13teen... or ThFAILteen... or ThThirteenteen... or Fou14teen... or Da F1RtEen) is currently considered the best [[roller coaster]] in the world, just above the acclaimed [[X:\No Way Out\|X:\WTF]] at [[Thorpe_Park\|Thorpe Park]], and Gouderix at Parc Asterix in France. It's situated in the [[Dark Forest\|Intamin Forest]] at [[Alton Towers]]. It is also the hiding place of [[James]].

	== Construction ==		== Construction ==

← Older revision		Revision as of 20:47, 16 December 2010
Line 1:		Line 1:
−	~~even wild mouse~~ at ~~flamingo land~~ is more ~~frightening~~ than this.~~period~~.	+	Thirteen (or <nowiki>Th13teen</nowiki>... or 13.... or Thir13teen... or ThFAILteen... or ThThirteenteen... or Fou14teen... or Da F1RtEen) is currently considered the best [[roller coaster]] in the world, just above the acclaimed [[X:\No Way Out\|X:\WTF]] at [[Thorpe_Park\|Thorpe Park]], and Gouderix at Parc Asterix in France. It's situated in the [[Dark Forest\|Intamin Forest]] at [[Alton Towers]]. It is also the hiding place of [[James]].
−	~~LAME LAME~~	+
		+	== Construction ==
		+
		+	It was constructed personally by [[John Wardley]] out of whatever scarce resources were available at the time (namely optimism, hyperbole, bits of old fluff, PVA glue and some steel that was pinched from a skip round the back of [[Drayton_Manor\|Drayton Manor]] - rumour has it this was earmarked for their long rumoured '[[Blue_Fire\|Blue Fire]] type thingy', plans which have consequently been put on hold while they build a hotel that approximately nobody will ever feasibly use). John then set about building what [[Alton_Towers\|Alton Towers]]' [[Marketing_Department\|marketing department]] dubbed, "every [[Roller_coaster\|roller coaster]] you've ever dreamed of... after eating too much cheese."
		+
		+	The construction of <nowiki>Th13teen</nowiki> was shrouded in mystery. So much so, that a mass grave was excavated on-site early on, to [[File:Th13teenhole.jpg\|thumb\|right\|The mass grave used to dispose of those who threatened to reveal Thirteen's secrets]] bury anyone who dared reveal the secrets of 'SW6' to the rabid 'enthusiast community'. It was during this phase, that [[Alton Towers]] colluded with 'Team [[TT\|TT]]' to keep the masses ignorant... sort of like communism. The team shamelessly accepted bribes (mostly crude polaroid snaps of [[John_Wardley\|John Wardley's]] bum), in return for removing any vaguely accurate information from the boards of TTF.
		+
		+	Ultimately however, all original plans were scrapped when 'an old [[Castle\|castle]] thing' sprung up overnight on the ground previously home to the [[Corkscrew\|Corkscrew]] (the <nowiki>'castle'</nowiki> is rumoured to have fallen out of a rider's pocket back in 1987, owing to the appalling lack of bag storage available, and simply nobody had noticed until now). Engineers decided to just build a bit of track, and feed it into the '<nowiki>castle</nowiki> thing' and see what happened. As it turns out, an elevator-like device gingerly lowered riders into the world's first crypt paradoxically located on the ground floor of a structure.
		+
		+	== Public Opinion ==
		+
		+	Skip forward to March 20th 2010 and Thir13irteen opened to great fanfare. Poor weather and even the presence of Jonathan Ross failed to dampen spirits. [[Alton_Towers\|Alton Towers]]' marketing team (often mistaken for mythical '[[Wraiths\|wraiths]]') were quick to seek out public opinion of the new ride. Opinions generally ranged from "Yeah, quite good. Bit short though" to "Yeah, I really enjoyed it... but it was a bit short". The day was overshadowed however, when [[John_Wardley\|John Wardley]] was kidnapped by a crowd of 'enthusiasts', after uncharacteristically deciding to go for a walk without an armed guard. His whereabouts remain unknown...
		+
		+	The ride experience of <nowiki>Th13teen</nowiki> has been described as having "more trims than a mens' barber shop on a Saturday morning" as well as being "a rollerskate around the woods, then finishing with a Tower Of Terror imitation drop". Oxford University's top linguistic experts are still working round the clock to de-code this sentence, to establish whether the quoted person enjoyed or hated the experience of <nowiki>Th13teen</nowiki>.
		+
		+	One particularly eloquent forum goer described Thirteen thus:
		+
		+	:''"this ride appears to be nothing more than the impromptu and accidental love child of The Frog Hopper and [[Runaway_Mine_Train\|Runaway Mine Train]], conceived following half a can of cider during an emotional school prom, discarded to fend for itself in woodland once reserved for duelling [[Schwarzkopf]]s and cross-valley woodies and unearthed during excavations for a tombstone marking the departure of the marketing director following not so much shooting themselves in the foot, but blowing off all four limbs after climbing inside an unexploded world war II bomb and promptly being left lying in the mud, swallowing the occasional passing slug in order to survive."''
		+
		+	== Technical Difficulties ==
		+	:''See also: [[Dedicated Trackside Flux Sensor]]''
		+
		+	<nowiki>Th13teen</nowiki> has recently been experiencing persistent technical issues. These have been initially addressed by imposing a strict weight limit on the trains - a move which has caused Theme Park Review to cancel their planned trip to [[Alton_Towers\|Alton Towers]] this Summer, after a suggestion of eating fewer burgers was unanimously vetoed.
		+
		+	== [[The_Marmite_Ride\|The Marmite Ride]] ==
		+	<nowiki>Th13teen</nowiki> - proclaimed as "<nowiki>The Ultimate</nowiki> [[Roller_coaster\|roller coaster]]" - has unfortunately divided opinions between anyone who has or hasn't ridden it, thus creating tension and worldwide backlash. The main reasons as to this divide in many communities is the way the [[Roller_coaster\|roller coaster]] was marketed (as a thrill ride, when in fact it was meant for families), and the ride experience itself with the 'OHAI GUYZ' world's first free-falling drop.
		+
		+	Thus this has now coined the phrase, [[The Marmite Ride]] because it is either loved and adored, pampered and made delicate like a Ming vase... or despised, spat on, kicked and regularly picked on. You could say it's the reason why it has so many technical delays, unlike [[Air]] who just has massive hissy fits.
		+
		+	[[Category: Roller Coaster]]

@@ Line 1: / Line 1: @@
-Thirteen (or <nowiki>Th13teen</nowiki>... or 13.... or Thir13teen... or ThFAILteen... or ThThirteenteen... or Fou14teen... or Da F1RtEen)  is currently considered the best [[roller coaster]] in the world, just above the acclaimed [[X:\No Way Out|X:\WTF]] at [[Thorpe_Park|Thorpe Park]], and Gouderix at Parc Asterix in France. It's situated in the [[Dark Forest|Intamin Forest]] at [[Alton Towers]]. It is also the hiding place of [[James]].
+even wild mouse at flamingo land is more frightening than this.period.
+LAME LAME
-== Construction ==
-−
-It was constructed personally by [[John Wardley]] out of whatever scarce resources were available at the time (namely optimism, hyperbole, bits of old fluff, PVA glue and some steel that was pinched from a skip round the back of [[Drayton_Manor|Drayton Manor]] - rumour has it this was earmarked for their long rumoured '[[Blue_Fire|Blue Fire]] type thingy', plans which have consequently been put on hold while they build a hotel that approximately nobody will ever feasibly use). John then set about building what [[Alton_Towers|Alton Towers]]' [[Marketing_Department|marketing department]] dubbed, "every [[Roller_coaster|roller coaster]] you've ever dreamed of... after eating too much cheese."
-−
-The construction of <nowiki>Th13teen</nowiki> was shrouded in mystery. So much so, that a mass grave was excavated on-site early on, to [[File:Th13teenhole.jpg|thumb|right|The mass grave used to dispose of those who threatened to reveal Thirteen's secrets]] bury anyone who dared reveal the secrets of 'SW6' to the rabid 'enthusiast community'. It was during this phase, that [[Alton Towers]] colluded with 'Team [[TT|TT]]' to keep the masses ignorant... sort of like communism. The team shamelessly accepted bribes (mostly crude polaroid snaps of [[John_Wardley|John Wardley's]] bum), in return for removing any vaguely accurate information from the boards of TTF.
-−
-Ultimately however, all original plans were scrapped when 'an old [[Castle|castle]] thing' sprung up overnight on the ground previously home to the [[Corkscrew|Corkscrew]] (the <nowiki>'castle'</nowiki> is rumoured to have fallen out of a rider's pocket back in 1987, owing to the appalling lack of bag storage available, and simply nobody had noticed until now). Engineers decided to just build a bit of track, and feed it into the '<nowiki>castle</nowiki> thing' and see what happened. As it turns out, an elevator-like device gingerly lowered riders into the world's first crypt paradoxically located on the ground floor of a structure.
-−
-== Public Opinion ==
-−
-Skip forward to March 20th 2010 and Thir13irteen opened to great fanfare. Poor weather and even the presence of Jonathan Ross failed to dampen spirits. [[Alton_Towers|Alton Towers]]' marketing team (often mistaken for mythical '[[Wraiths|wraiths]]') were quick to seek out public opinion of the new ride. Opinions generally ranged from "Yeah, quite good. Bit short though" to "Yeah, I really enjoyed it... but it was a bit short". The day was overshadowed however, when [[John_Wardley|John Wardley]] was kidnapped by a crowd of 'enthusiasts', after uncharacteristically deciding to go for a walk without an armed guard. His whereabouts remain unknown...
-−
-The ride experience of <nowiki>Th13teen</nowiki> has been described as having "more trims than a mens' barber shop on a Saturday morning" as well as being "a rollerskate around the woods, then finishing with a Tower Of Terror imitation drop". Oxford University's top linguistic experts are still working round the clock to de-code this sentence, to establish whether the quoted person enjoyed or hated the experience of <nowiki>Th13teen</nowiki>.
-−
-One particularly eloquent forum goer described Thirteen thus:
-−
-:''"this ride appears to be nothing more than the impromptu and accidental love child of The Frog Hopper and [[Runaway_Mine_Train|Runaway Mine Train]], conceived following half a can of cider during an emotional school prom, discarded to fend for itself in woodland once reserved for duelling [[Schwarzkopf]]s and cross-valley woodies and unearthed during excavations for a tombstone marking the departure of the marketing director following not so much shooting themselves in the foot, but blowing off all four limbs after climbing inside an unexploded world war II bomb and promptly being left lying in the mud, swallowing the occasional passing slug in order to survive."''
-−
-== Technical Difficulties ==
-:''See also: [[Dedicated Trackside Flux Sensor]]''
-−
-<nowiki>Th13teen</nowiki> has recently been experiencing persistent technical issues. These have been initially addressed by imposing a strict weight limit on the trains - a move which has caused Theme Park Review to cancel their planned trip to [[Alton_Towers|Alton Towers]] this Summer, after a suggestion of eating fewer burgers was unanimously vetoed.
-−
-== [[The_Marmite_Ride|The Marmite Ride]] ==
-<nowiki>Th13teen</nowiki> - proclaimed as "<nowiki>The Ultimate</nowiki> [[Roller_coaster|roller coaster]]" - has unfortunately divided opinions between anyone who has or hasn't ridden it, thus creating tension and worldwide backlash. The main reasons as to this divide in many communities is the way the [[Roller_coaster|roller coaster]] was marketed (as a thrill ride, when in fact it was meant for families), and the ride experience itself with the 'OHAI GUYZ' world's first free-falling drop.
-−
-Thus this has now coined the phrase, [[The Marmite Ride]] because it is either loved and adored, pampered and made delicate like a Ming vase... or despised, spat on, kicked and regularly picked on. You could say it's the reason why it has so many technical delays, unlike [[Air]] who just has massive hissy fits.
-−
-[[Category: Roller Coaster]]

← Older revision		Revision as of 23:11, 21 November 2010
Line 1:		Line 1:
−	Thirteen (or <nowiki>Th13teen</nowiki>... or 13.... or Thir13teen... or ThFAILteen... or ThThirteenteen... or Fou14teen... or Da F1RtEen) is currently considered the best [[roller coaster]] in the world, just above the acclaimed [[X:\No Way Out\|X:\WTF]] at [[Thorpe_Park\|Thorpe Park]], and Gouderix at Parc Asterix in France. It's situated in the [[Dark Forest\|Intamin Forest]] at [[Alton Towers]].	+	Thirteen (or <nowiki>Th13teen</nowiki>... or 13.... or Thir13teen... or ThFAILteen... or ThThirteenteen... or Fou14teen... or Da F1RtEen) is currently considered the best [[roller coaster]] in the world, just above the acclaimed [[X:\No Way Out\|X:\WTF]] at [[Thorpe_Park\|Thorpe Park]], and Gouderix at Parc Asterix in France. It's situated in the [[Dark Forest\|Intamin Forest]] at [[Alton Towers]]. It is also the hiding place of [[James]].

	== Construction ==		== Construction ==

← Older revision		Revision as of 17:13, 16 November 2010
Line 29:		Line 29:
	Thus this has now coined the phrase, [[The Marmite Ride]] because it is either loved and adored, pampered and made delicate like a Ming vase... or despised, spat on, kicked and regularly picked on. You could say it's the reason why it has so many technical delays, unlike [[Air]] who just has massive hissy fits.		Thus this has now coined the phrase, [[The Marmite Ride]] because it is either loved and adored, pampered and made delicate like a Ming vase... or despised, spat on, kicked and regularly picked on. You could say it's the reason why it has so many technical delays, unlike [[Air]] who just has massive hissy fits.

−	~~[[Category: Faff Ride]]~~
	[[Category: Roller Coaster]]		[[Category: Roller Coaster]]