Colossus

This article contains graciously stolen material from Unencyclopedia.

Colossus, Thorpe Park's first real roller coaster set within the Lost City. Built in 2002 by Intamin, a company notable for creating unreliable (and dangerous) rides, Colossus is the worlds first money extraction coaster, and has been cleverly designed to remove all your spare change, body piercings, belly button fluff, internal organs and small children from your possession.

To save money, the park maintenance team (Bob) has removed all the wheels from this ride to save greasing the bearings. The sound of grinding metal can be heard all over London, even above the constant sound of gun shots.

Fan Nicknames

• Colossucks
• Lolossus
• For-The-Lossus