There's Something in the Dungheap

There's Something in the Dungheap (also known as There's Summat in t'Dun'eap or simply Crap) was a large converted sewage plant, around the back of Alton Towers somewhere. Any lost children who stumble across the attraction were invited to play on the available attractions.

History

The Dungheap was one of Alton Towers' longest planned attractions. Development started when the Alton Towers Hotel opened, and continued with the later Splash Landings Hotel. All the toilet waste from the hotels was stored in preparation of the poopile. A cleaner was employed to single-handedly collect all the poo, removing any wet or mishapen pieces, and slap it all next to Riverbank Eye Spy to create the main Dungheap feature.

The attraction was triumphantly opened to the public in 2007, marketed as: "Every toilet you've ever dreamed of in one." Some bits of wood, tarmac and plastic were installed to keep visitors entertained.

Attractions

• Dungheap - Within the actual poopile was a projector which displays images of naked women every ten minutes and naked men on the hour - it's a family resort you know. Also doubled as a communal toilet.
• Queueline: The Ride - Beyond the main poopile was the back end of the Rita queueline. After being disused for several years, the cattle pen was re-opened as an new attraction (supposedly a maze).
• Bog - An actual bog with a zip wire suspended above it. Caution: children dropped in the bog cannot be collected until the end of the day.
• Tarmac - All children love it.
• Bins - Somewhere to throw your waste (except human waste, this can simply be added to the poopile).