Chav

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The Chav is a species of human being that is commonly found in cities, towns and theme parks. Members of the chav race can often be distinguished from ordinary people by their choice of vocabularly, earings, cigarettes and the tendancy to call everybody they pass by on the street a "gayboy". Chavs make up 78.6% of the General Public, and are the most successful species of human probably because of their inability to control their breeding habits. They often avoid Alton Towers smoking ban because they think they are cool, while continuing to spit as well. Most people dream of being able to set the chav population on fire as easily as the [Skyride], however, like the Chav Scanner, this is just a dream.

Popular chav phrases:

  • Brrrap brrrap, innit!
  • Innit, blad!
  • Innit, breadbins!
  • Oi is well hard, innit!
  • Yo, bling! (Considered by many chavologists to not be a true chav phrase because the word "Innit".)
  • Leg it ta Nemesis, innit!
  • You f*****, s*** l**** r*****ing, innit!
  • Innit!
  • Let wu' go then! (Generally only heard in locations "oop North" of England.)