In these dark ages of poorly-written news articles from Merlin Entertainments, a need has emerged for an easy way to translate the words and phrases direct from the desk of Nick Varney into plain English. Thankfully, a team of
boffin wizards people at Collins were on-hand to compile a handy guide.
- amazingly good reasons
- amazingly good reasons for Merlin, or;
- financial reasons.
- best possible value
- spend the most possible money
- boffin wizards
- finance department
- customer research
- some idealistic user personas haphazardly drawn up for management
- a term to state a mild, but not necessarily ever completed or continued, interest in getting something done
- fizzy for longer
- exactly the same as before, only in smaller amounts.
- the single most commonly used adjective at Merlin Entertainments
- glad you asked
- glad you asked a question we've prepared an answer for (don't ask anything serious, like we'd be able to answer that)
- improving your experience
- raising prices and reducing the service, but telling customers it is a better product
- Editor note: we really don't know what this actually means.
- magically brilliant
- a combination of two popular buzz words in the PR department
- prompted by customers
- also known as 'slightly listening by skimming the multiple pages of customer feedback'
- good enough to sell an annual pass renewal next year
- second only to Disney
- name dropping a company who have had 6 decades worth of successful theme park experience to look better thus rating the finance highly against
- UK's biggest attractions
- synonymous with 'second only to Disney'
- valued passholders
- synonymous with 'valued bank balances'
- 50 rides and attractions
- a hedging phrase used to deflect attention from a major attraction being closed/unavailable