Alton Bear

Revision as of 21:06, 22 October 2010

Alton Bear appears to be a sweet, kind amusing mascot from Alton Towers who only wishes to give you a great big hug during a wonderful day at the Alton Towers Resort. His fluffy exterior as a evident bear, in his dungarees with his hands waving to give you a beautiful smile of happiness and joy.

YOU'RE.

TOO.

DAMN.

WRONG.

Alton Bear is in fact, not a cheerful and happy bear who inhabits the former mascot stance from Henry Hound, but is in reality a drunk, cynical and sarcastic being who hates everyone and everything unlike the Wraiths. Every night after park closing time, he runs riot around city centres in a Fiat stolen off eBay with a handful of prostitutes and drug dealers by his side.

DO NOT TRUST THE BEAR...

LOL jk all he does is sit in with a Dominoes pizza and watch endless Meryl Streep films.