Terror Tomb

Terror Tomb (later known as Forbidden Tomb and ultimately Tomb Blaster) was a dark ride at Chessington World of Adventures which was built after it was decided that The Fifth Dimension was sooo last year and should be rethemed. It opened in 1995 and featured a totally new theme and storyline to that of The Fifth Dimension, based in an Ancient Egyptian warehouse. And it was very scary indeed (if you were five years old).

Storyline

The demise of The Fifth Dimension was partly due to the fact that the General Public was once again too thick to understand the storyline. Why? I don't know. Maybe the couldn't get the grasp of why there were giant, evil pineapples in one scene, or they were just chavs. The new ride's storyline was heavily dumbed down to make it hammy and predictable, so that they would understand.

The ride started off with a big, black room where the entrance to the maintenance bay was located. So far, so good, nice and simple. Then on the right, the ride's central character, Abdab, was seen murmering away. Disaster! All the riders are suddenly confused and start punching themselves in thickness. Nevermind. Unfortunately, John Wardley had forgotten to take into account that people got thicker with each generation when he input his calculations into the thick-o-meter, so Terror Tomb's storyline was infact technically even more confusing than The Fifth Dimension's.

Who the hell are you? Go away! I has jewel to steal from this tomb I'm underestimating!

Only a few weeks after opening, the ride started to suffer from several "Huh? Wot duz dat mean?"s and "Y duz dat man hav a funi wort on hiz noze?"s. In a desperate attempt to save the ride from the same fate as its predecessor, the name was changed from 'Terror Tomb' to 'Forbidden Tomb' because alliteration was a tricky concept. This did not stop the ride from being heavily altered in 2002, when it fell to the Great Dark Ride Interactivity Reformation of the Modern Age, and was converted into some sort of laser quest called 'Tomb Blaster'. Well, chavs understand guns so there was that problem gone.

Ride experience

As stated above, the train travels past Abdab, a badly named Egyptian gorilla with a strange accent, who muttered some words. "This tomb is closed, shut, get it? No more tourists in this tomb! Get out! The jewel is mine! This tomb is closed, shut, get it? No more tourists in this tomb! Get out! The jewel is mine!" he said, in that order (roughly). And, just in case you missed it the first time he said it all over again. The train is then pulled up a ramp themed as some sort of tunnel, as a rolling boulder rumbles overhead. Why the Ancient Egyptians relied on Sparks Creative Services to create their booby traps nobody will ever know, they barely ever work.

This ugly animatronic thingy often scared riders because his badly cellotaped face often fell apart right in front of them.

Then, the Snake Pit! Plastic snakes attack riders from the festering pool of reptiles, as Abdab (yes, him again, remember?) is seen pulling on a rope to let in more plastic snakes. Onwards we go past some carved skulls in a wall to find the Spike Room. In here, there were some spikes, a hidden revolving door in the wall, and a coffin. Guess what? Abdab just had to try and unleash the spikes on the riders, but accidently discovers the secret door and gets stuck in the coffin! Something to do with a jewel apparently. Silly Billy. The scene still exists in present day Tomb Blaster, though it makes even less sense now. Today it involves: some spikes that get lowered instead of unleashed; a mummy with a gun instead of Abdab; and some treasure in a chest instead of the coffin (?!). Ah, the joy of rethemes.

More devilish antics are up next when riders pass a warewolf in a cage, and a skeleton lowering a body into a well of lava. The train goes into the Axe Corridor, so called because it features some cardboard cut-outs throwing axes, as well as an ugly animatronic thingy. The climax of the ride comes when the trains enter the Fire Pit, where a giant statue of Anubis sits elegantly in front of you. Abdab, being the fool he is, is clinging on to a wobbling obelisk trying to reach for the jewel in Anubis's hand. Why? Let it go Abdab. It is probably only made of fibreglass anyway. After that is a revolving tunnel effect, probably because there just happened to be one left over from Dinglby's Fairground that happened to visit during the ride's construction.

Then, the finale scene, the so-called "Jukebox Duel". No, of course it's not about a mummy playing an electric guitar whilst Abdab gets brutally murdered, don't be stupid! Oh, wait...

And, after some props that do stuff and flying heads on poles (probably stolen from the Haunted House at Alton Towers), that was the end. Voila!

After having his moustache had to be ripped off as a punishment, Abdab now keeps watch over the Vampire queueline using CCTV in his nostrils.

The storage room where Abdab and his friends were dumped, before being rediscovered. Notice the after-effects of the fight and the poor attempt at wrapping themselves in bubblewrap.

Death of Abdab

Whilst Abdab had many incarnations, he did not have enough time to regenerate before be died. All of his previous incarnations came together for one last time to have a big fight over who should get their wart frozen off first, which ended badly. His bodies were dumped in a cupboard somewhere in the tomb and left to rot for several years.

In 2010, a Chessington member of staff named Bob was startled to discover Abdab as he collapsed on to him after Bob had opened the cupboard door. After pleeding for a bit of change, the Abdabs were given new jobs in the queueline for Vampire to keep watch over all the chavs (see Evil Satan Minions). Disguised as bits of tatty theming, Abdab remains in the queueline to this day, though his moustache does not.