Oblivion

Latest revision as of 05:08, 28 December 2019

Oblivion, now sponsored by Fanta.

Located in X-Sector, Oblivion opened in 1998 as the world's first vertical 87 degree drop roller coaster. Measured from the drop to the breaks it holds the record for world's shortest coaster in terms of duration. Oblivion was designed by God. Oblivion is also known for it's incessant, annoying queueline which spirals up a very, very, very steep and unecessary hill, which explains it's slight unpopularity. It also explains the shorter queueing cycle than Nemesis, Air and Rita, which all take over 200 minutes to queue whilst Oblivion's is under 200 minutes. However, the Lord of the Darkness 'attempts' to cheer visitors up through his informative, creepy but very entertaining videos. They sometimes work.

[edit] Construction

During 1997, Fantasy World, as the area was then known, was mostly closed off to allow for the construction of the ride. Guards were stationed around the area to fend off enthusiasts trying to take photos of the ride. Like Thirteen, a massive pit was dug which served as a mass grave for those caught trying to reveal the secrets of the ride. This was to double as a tunnel through which the ride passes.

[edit] Secret Research

Not much about the nature of the track in the tunnel is known. It is widely speculated that shuttles do not in fact travel straight though and out the other side as it appears to observers. Unconfirmed rumours suggest that there is an underground station located adjacent to a secret research facility where riders victims are experimented on. Once these experiments are completed, they are taken back onto a shuttle which is launched out of the tunnel. This launch is carefully synchronised with a train dropping into the hole to avoid arousing suspicion. Victims are drugged so they have no memory of the experiments, and all they remember is a straight section of track. Delays to experiments are passed off as 'breakdowns', often undercover researches will use a mobile phone or camera on the lift hill to give an excuse to stop the 'ride'.

In an attempt to bring this appalling abuse of human rights to an end, MI5 stationed undercover agents in Farley near the entrance to Alton Towers, using the pseudonym of 'the Ropers'. Their mission was to bring the experiments to an end without attracting attention. They planned to achieve this by complaining about the noise made by the ride, however so far their attempts have been unsuccessful.

[edit] Mini Museum

Within the queueline of Oblivion, there are several items and objects left over from previous attractions, made to look spooky in a secret research facility... queue. Most of these objects of enthusiast interest however are usually left to dust and are unfortunately useful for chavs who can't be arsed to stick their chewing gum in the bins. This has made many enthusiasts cry and nearly commit suicide down the tunnel.

"Don't... look... down"! lol jks now u hav no bottle1

[edit] The Oblivion Dominatrix

The 2010 season marked a sad season for most. This was the year that the Queueline themeing had a revamp to get rid of the chewing gum and grottyness left by Chavs over the previous 11 years. With this new PVC was added to the outerbuilding before the station and the adhesive used to glue the plastic to the building reacted with the rainwater creating Oblivion love juice. However, this was later confirmed to be the decaying remains of the Oblivion woman that gave pre-ride briefing to the guests before boarding who resided in the ceiling of such building. To enthusiasts delight the woman returned for the 2011 season. It was thought that she too a brief trip to Europa Park for a year announcing ride announcements for both Vineta & Blue Fire.

Oblivion Beckons in T- 5 Minutes. Be prepared for embarkation. There are 8 seats to a row. All ride positions offer a front-seat view. For your safety follow the instructions given by the Operatives at all times. Please remember... sit back... holding tight............. are you prepared for Oblivion?