Hungry Harbouritis

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[[Category:TST Medical Journal]]
 
[[Category:TST Medical Journal]]
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[[Category:Lightwater Valley]]

Latest revision as of 18:20, 11 May 2017

Hungry Harbouritis as faxed through to us upon discovery

Hungry Harbouritis is a medical condition that can be contracted from eating food at Lightwater Valley.

The symptoms are compounded if the patient has also contracted Ultimache. Studies have shown that 90% of patients contracting Hungry Harbouritis also experienced Ultimache complications in the same period.

[edit] Common symptoms

Known symptoms of Hungry Harbouritis include:

  • grease-laden hands from the poorly-cleaned seating area
  • inflammation of the throat, due to high salt content in the pizza
  • increased hunger levels, from small food portions
  • potential paper digestive issues, due to ingestion of meal deal vouchers (upon realisation that they have higher nutritional content than the food)
  • heightened awareness of the poor quality of Lightwater Valley, resulting in an early departure from the park
  • increased resemblance of facial features to starchy vegetables (eg. potatoes)
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