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Defunct attractions that you differ from the common posthumous consensus on

Matt N

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Hi guys. Last year was an interesting year for ride closures in the theme park industry, with quite a few notable names departing for that big theme park in the sky in 2024. Kingda Ka was probably the crown jewel of these notable closures, but there were some other notable ones in the USA, such as Green Lantern, Anaconda and Nighthawk, and closer to home (albeit not particularly comparable in terms of scale), The Blade also operated for the final time at Alton Towers in 2024 after over 40 years in the lineup. Over my time socialising in theme park enthusiast circles, I’ve noticed that the closure of a ride can tend to bring out… extremes of emotion regarding it. When a ride closes, general opinion often pivots towards either idolising it and making it out to be a “lost legend” of sorts or severely criticising it and expressing words to the effect of “good riddance to bad rubbish”. With this in mind, I’d be intrigued to know; are there any defunct attractions where you differ from the common consensus that’s developed around them in death? Is there a defunct ride that goes down in legend that you didn’t think was all that? Or is there a defunct ride that history doesn’t look back kindly on that you actually really liked?

I’ll get the ball rolling with a couple of my own answers.

In terms of a defunct ride that goes down in legend that I didn’t think was all that, I’d firstly bring Dragon Challenge at Universal’s Islands of Adventure into the conversation. A lot of people seem to look back on this duo of duelling B&M inverts really fondly, I’ve sometimes heard Hagrid’s compared unfavourably to them, and they generally seem to be perceived as legends of the defunct coaster world. But personally, I didn’t massively rate either side. While I admittedly only rode either side once and did not get to experience them duelling, I thought they were easily the two weakest B&M inverts I’ve ridden by some distance. I didn’t think they were bad rides per se, but I wouldn’t really extend my praise beyond “average”. I don’t particularly miss them, I infinitely prefer Hagrid’s, and I don’t think they personally lived up to their legendary posthumous reputation for me.

I’m going to go quite Alton Towers centric for my next two answers; with it being my most visited park and the park I’ve been going to annually since I was 6, it’s the park where I’ve seen the most attractions come and go by some distance.

Maybe “goes down in legend” is a bit of an exaggeration for this one, but a warmly remembered defunct ride at Alton Towers that I didn’t think was all that, perhaps controversially, was The Flume. I never got the point of the section in the woods that seemed never-ending, and I never found it anything overly remarkable as log flumes go. I definitely thought its time had come by the time it went, and I infinitely prefer Wicker Man. I didn’t ride it very much (my last ride on The Flume was in 2014, and I seem to remember that being my first ride on it for a couple of years at the time), whereas Congo River Rapids used to be a staple every visit when we went to Alton for weekends when I was a child, which I think says it all, really!

On the flip side of this, a defunct Alton ride that was panned both posthumously and in life that I actually have very fond childhood memories of is Charlie and the Chocolate Factory. This seems to be utterly panned by enthusiasts, but I absolutely loved it as a child and always found it such a magical ride, with great theming and an awesome elevator section! It was one of the key rides me and my mum used to love riding together when I wasn’t big enough for the big rides and my sister was off riding those with my dad, and of all the rides I did as a child at Alton, Charlie is one of the ones I have some of the fondest memories from. Enthusiasts might pan it, but I’ll always have a soft spot for it, personally.

But I’d be keen to know; what are some defunct attractions that you differ from the common consensus on? Are there any defunct rides that you loved and everyone else hated? Or are there any that everyone else loved and you didn’t overly rate?
 
Mine is the pirate adventure and what hurts the most is that in March it will be 10 years since it closed and to date nothing has replaced it.

At Alton Towers it was there breakdancer Dynamo. It was my favourite ride when I 1st visited in Aug 1993 and must have ridden on it 3 times that day. Was gutted when it was removed in 2000 but glad it was put into storage and came back in forbidden valley for 2 more seasons.
 
If we are counting Scorpion Express as defunct, I thought that it was a really fun ride with a high level of theming, which seems to differ from the general consensus. However, it was my first rollercoaster, which likely has resulted in nostalgia.
 
@Matt N Dragon Challenge was lame - I agree. But as a visual ride it was pretty cool. Don’t forget to was built at a time when the inverts were the coolest thing around. To have two - duelling - was something else back then.

As for Charlie - it wasn’t a bad ride per se. But don’t forget in these parts it replaced a truly legendary ride in Toyland Tours, hence the critic. To many on here that ride was exactly how you described Charlie.

For me - it’s Submission. I genuinely enjoyed the ride, didn’t find it uncomfortable. We a unique experience.

Let’s face it - we wouldn’t complain if it was resurrected somehow today.
 
I absolutely loved Slammer and it was my favourite ride in the UK along with Nemesis.

There was nothing like that feeling when it hit full speed and catapulted you face first over Thorpe. The lap bar was always fully pushed down but you could ride with a very loose shoulder restraint which made the hang time pretty terrifying.
 
Charlie's Elevator sequence was great fun, especially if riding with someone who was gifted in the chest area.

Dragons of the Duelling variety were certainly icons of the time. Probably a lot lends itself to the duelling aspect of it rather than the individual coasters though. The queueline was fantastic too. I always preferred Ice over Fire which wasn't the style at the time.

Not sure if there's anything much I really differ from opinion in terms of defunct stuff. Most sensible people know that IP Bubbleworks was turd.
 
I absolutely loved Slammer and it was my favourite ride in the UK along with Nemesis.

There was nothing like that feeling when it hit full speed and catapulted you face first over Thorpe. The lap bar was always fully pushed down but you could ride with a very loose shoulder restraint which made the hang time pretty terrifying.
My first and only ride on slammer was October 2016, annoyed that it took me so long to get a ride in considering it went defunct a year later. Loved it so much
 
Mine are bobsleigh coasters in general, many of which have closed or are heavily rumoured to have not long left. Consensus seems to be they are dull and not worth saving so not one really cares, I think they are so much fun and stand out as something that bit different against what is offered by the thousands of tracked coasters out there.

Save the bobsleighs!!
 
For me, I would say the Retrosquad and Spinjam specifically.

They filled in gaps in the Towers line up that are apparent and the quirky storyline worked. Spinjam filled in a part of the line up that Thorpe Park fill with the likes of Samurai - I think a Mondial Top Scan should come to Towers but that's a different conversation.

They may be fairground rides although I'd honestly think that having something from the likes of SBF would be much worse.

I'd say that except for Roller Disco, I think the rest of the Retrosquad and Flavios could've been rethemed and permanently integrated into the line up quite well.

I'm just disappointed they didn't keep it going into 2024 and beyond until the permanent flats are installed and even install more Retrosquad flats or even a Retrosquad Log Flume (from Reverchon) 🤣 I think a Retrosquad coaster could be fantastic too 😄
 
CATCF, Air and arguably all of Ug Land I thought were good. The first two suffered from budget cuts that could have have turned them from good enough to great.

Ug Land in particular had a great concept tied into the history of the park and the corkscrew well.

Otherwise, tea cups swans and the flume felt far more British and place relevant. They had a classic charm that needing added to.

And as others have said Pirate Adventure is a massive miss.

Could I add on events wise The Great British Bucket and Spade event should come back on the lawns.
 
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For me, I would say the Retrosquad and Spinjam specifically.

They filled in gaps in the Towers line up that are apparent and the quirky storyline worked. Spinjam filled in a part of the line up that Thorpe Park fill with the likes of Samurai - I think a Mondial Top Scan should come to Towers but that's a different conversation.

They may be fairground rides although I'd honestly think that having something from the likes of SBF would be much worse.

I'd say that except for Roller Disco, I think the rest of the Retrosquad and Flavios could've been rethemed and permanently integrated into the line up quite well.

I'm just disappointed they didn't keep it going into 2024 and beyond until the permanent flats are installed and even install more Retrosquad flats or even a Retrosquad Log Flume (from Reverchon) 🤣 I think a Retrosquad coaster could be fantastic too 😄
My kids LOVED Funk'n'Fly and would ride it multiple times a visit, it was a big thrill ride for them and a nice change from Heave-Ho! for me so I will always look back on that fondly and am sad it went.
 
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