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Thorpe Park: General Discussion

I don’t think the idea of a relaxing space is in itself a bad one. Thorpe is a park that arguably lacks relaxing space at present, so this could be seen as filling a void. The beach was also arguably a bit of a relic of Thorpe’s past and quite underutilised for the amount of space it took up.

But when they haven’t built or announced anything new since Hyperia, I think this being the biggest new thing since does leave a bit of a sour taste.

I’ll admit I am disappointed in how Thorpe Park have thus far wasted the momentum they built up by building Hyperia. Had they followed up Hyperia with a few really good years of targeted investment (not necessarily major things, but maybe some new flat rides or things to fill a few gaps and improve the experience), I think it could have gone a long way towards righting the wrongs of the late 2010s and early 2020s and making Thorpe a really thriving park with a positive feel again.

As much as I think Hyperia itself contributed to this in 2024 and I think Thorpe has made some really good improvements in recent years that have made the vibe at the park feel fresher and more positive than it did a few years ago, I fear that the lack of, well, anything following Hyperia could have squandered the potential to take this even further and could be driving the park back towards stagnancy and lack of direction if continued in the long term.
 
The quality quiet place is the Diana memorial sunken garden, by the back of Stealth.
Exclusive ert on all the benches on the last old gits outing.
Magnificent attention to detail around the small pond.

But this looks fine and is central, and needed.

Thoosies eh, no pleasing 'em.
 
venny said:
This is quite possibly the most uninspiring thing I’ve ever seen in a theme park concept artwork. If the concept art is this bad, I cant imagine how bad it’s going to be once it’s flung together.

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I’ve never seen paving described as a new addition but okay.

They could paint a hopscotch grid on it. Thats just my armchair… engineering..? Civil service-ing..?
 
KolonelKlink said:
I think thoosies - and the general public at large - would probably be happier if 2025 hadn’t seen any new attractions and 2026’s new attraction was quite literally a few benches.

I mean it’s farcical.
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I think that the thing that makes it farcical is that they’re making a thing of it. It’s literally a few benches, shouting about it just highlights how little investment Thorpe has had besides Hyperia.
 
Like others have said Jack came up with some in game plans. It looks like a kids fridge drawing. The complete lack of warmth or shelter is what makes it really laughable.

You would have thought they wanted to extend the season and get more visitors out of the summer months. So far this screams summer holidays when the parks to busy and that's it.

I've seen shopping centres and garden centres with more thought and fun ideas than this. The lack of planters and trees shows little in terms of wildlife and environmental concern.

In 3 years this area will be a mess, the paint will be green and the overpriced food trucks will be abandoned.

Thorpe won't compete with universal and by the looks of it M£rlin don't even have the fight to try.

On another note it does look like an area where M£rlin will loose money as you are not far from the car park and can sit somewhere with your packed lunch. Start posting that on the Thorpe Park socials and see how quickly they u turn!
 
JamesA said:
Wouldn't surprise me if the aim was for Hyperia to sustain the park for the next 10 years.

Ridiculous that the Colossus repaint hasn't been finished either (unless it has? Someone fill me in... I daresay it hasn't)
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In terms of thrills, probably. That's quite a long time now that adding a new extreme ride has not done as much for attendance as might be expected.

I understand why they build tall rides at Thorpe, but I really think they're missing out on a lot of custom by not having some better family and family-thrill rides.
 
SuperMuscleMan said:
Thorpe won't compete with universal and by the looks of it M£rlin don't even have the fight to try.
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I’d say a couple of things in response to this.

Firstly, Thorpe Park is a very different product to what Universal will offer. Universal’s product will likely be more premium, yes, but it will also likely come at a higher price point and be targeting a different demographic to Thorpe Park. A regional theme park with large roller coasters and flat rides is a very different product to a premium IP theme park aiming to attract substantial international custom, which will likely focus more on immersive theming and dark rides. With this in mind, I don’t think Thorpe Park necessarily needs to compete with Universal; I think their best bet is to differentiate from Universal, which I think they have a fair shot at if they focus on the coasters and flats.

Secondly, Universal was, until less than a year ago, entirely hypothetical. The planning application was only approved a couple of months ago, and the project was only formally announced and confirmed in April 2025. With this in mind, we definitely won’t be seeing any concrete response to Universal from Merlin yet, if we do at all, and it would be unfair to expect one from them at this point. You’re not going to see a major response to Universal as early as 2026; it will take far longer for Merlin to devise any kind of proper strategy. What we are seeing now is almost certainly not Merlin’s intended response to Universal; I think we’ll need to wait at least a couple of years to ascertain this.
East Coast Mariner said:
I understand why they build tall rides at Thorpe, but I really think they're missing out on a lot of custom by not having some better family and family-thrill rides.
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I don’t disagree that Thorpe would benefit from diversifying a little more, but I think thrills is the right audience for them to target in the context of where in the country they are. The South East is very saturated for family parks, with Legoland and Chessington being mere minutes from Thorpe and Paultons not being a million miles away either. So if Thorpe went gung-ho in targeting families, I think they’d get swallowed up among the local family park competition, whereas going for thrills does differentiate them.
 
SuperMuscleMan said:
Like others have said Jack came up with some in game plans. It looks like a kids fridge drawing. The complete lack of warmth or shelter is what makes it really laughable.

You would have thought they wanted to extend the season and get more visitors out of the summer months. So far this screams summer holidays when the parks to busy and that's it.

I've seen shopping centres and garden centres with more thought and fun ideas than this. The lack of planters and trees shows little in terms of wildlife and environmental concern.

In 3 years this area will be a mess, the paint will be green and the overpriced food trucks will be abandoned.

Thorpe won't compete with universal and by the looks of it M£rlin don't even have the fight to try.
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The stylisation of "M£rlin" with a pound sign is a touch sixth form common room, isn't it? It suggests that profit seeking is a unique moral failing of Merlin Entertainments, rather than the legal fiduciary duty of every single corporation on the planet.

If you think Universal, a division of Comcast, a company which would happily monetise the air you breathe if they could figure out how to trademark oxygen, is going to arrive in Bedfordshire as an altruistic non-profit organisation, you're in for a very expensive shock. Universal invented the tiered upcharge system. They will charge you to park, charge you to enter, charge you to skip the queue and then charge you for a wand that interacts with a shop window. They're not a charity.

I also feel compelled to draft an immediate addendum to my previous legislative work.

Goose's Corollary to Universal Expansion:
"As a discussion regarding any Merlin update grows longer, the probability of it being dismissed as inadequate compared to the speculative perfection of the unbuilt Universal park approaches 1."

Thorpe Park is not trying to compete with Universal UK. Universal UK is currently a muddy field and a Statutory Instrument. Thorpe Park is trying to compete with Netflix, the cinema and the apathy of teenagers in Staines.
SuperMuscleMan said:
On another note it does look like an area where M£rlin will loose money as you are not far from the car park and can sit somewhere with your packed lunch. Start posting that on the Thorpe Park socials and see how quickly they u turn!
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If a guest is sitting on a bench eating a packed lunch, Merlin hasn't "lost" money. They've already secured the gate price and the extortionate parking fee. Providing a nice place to sit actually encourages guests to stay longer, increasing the likelihood that they might eventually succumb to the urge for a fizzy drink or an ice cream.

If the area looks like a "kid's fridge drawing", that's largely because it is concept art. Reality is often disappointing, but let's not pretend a picnic bench is a sign of corporate collapse.
 
GooseOnTheLoose said:
The stylisation of "M£rlin" with a pound sign is a touch sixth form common room, isn't it? It suggests that profit seeking is a unique moral failing of Merlin Entertainments, rather than the legal fiduciary duty of every single corporation on the planet.
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Conversely there are plenty of theme parks that operate for profit but still put a strong emphasis on customer satisfaction.

Merlin through their actions seem to make that far less of a priority.
 
Bowser said:
Conversely there are plenty of theme parks that operate for profit but still put a strong emphasis on customer satisfaction.

Merlin through their actions seem to make that far less of a priority.
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And yet, the car parks remain full and the passes keep selling.

Merlin has simply realised that the British public's desire to have something to moan about is stronger than their desire for a premium experience. They're merely facilitating our national pastime, which is surely the pinnacle of true customer satisfaction.
 
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