The above post from
@Dave reminds me, I experienced perhaps the worst customer service I've ever experienced at a park during a visit to Phantasialand earlier this year.
The locker area and system of F.L.Y. is absolute chaos and enormous faff to deal with. I was pleasantly surprised by the coaster itself, but such is the stress of getting on the thing with everything off your person, I actually only rode it twice over two days. This is despite its excellent capacity and what should be in theory, a simplified boarding process for a flying coaster that is by virtue of this system, rendered absolutely tedious.
Anyhow, on my first ride, I followed the instructions to remove everything from the pockets of the seemingly endless layers I was wearing in the dead of winter. Upon reaching the metal detector, an attendant spotted that I was still wearing my hat. Anywhere else, this might be funny, right? But the attendant treated this particular moment of accidental guest slapstick as if we were in a real airport, not a steampunk shed, and as if I had instead made a joke about wearing a suicide vest. He had hurried my partner, nervous about the experience, to the station whereas I had to head back. Realising my mistake, I did one bad swear (to myself) and started calling after her.
The attendant then actually did a childish impression of me calling after my girlfriend
to my face. Gobsmacked, I asked him what the problem was, and presumably realising he was well over the line, he said, "I heard the word you used, I cannot stand swearing!" I apologised for my minor effin' and jeffin', but asked him if mocking me was really necessary? Knowing the absolute stubbornness and often er, direct emotional temperament of many Germans (source: seven years living in Berlin, although the Rhine region is a different game...), I apologised, and then he outright refused to accept my apology.
I exited right through the door of shame, and by the time I'd stowed said hat, he had shifted positions. He checked my restraint five minutes later without looking either of us in the eye.
In bizarre contrast, next day on the return flight from Cologne, my girlfriend optimistically attempted to get an orange peeler through hand luggage. Understandably, she was pulled aside for a grilling by several real-life airport security staff, who found this particularly ambitious smuggling attempt to be nothing more than absolutely hilarious.