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TST Loo Users... POO-NITE!

Just pounding out a whopper. Waited all day for this :)

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As I type, my sphincter is being torn asunder by a log the size of my arm. At least, it feels that big.

HELP!
 
I had to go home to have one as I couldn't find the key to the barn where my toilet is and was desperate luckily my house is only a 3 min drive from work!
 
What the hell have I stumbled upon?!?! Some sort of dirty diary I see, how ironic that I found this while unloading a curly habana!

Maybe It should be renamed to 50 shades of ****...i'll get it started.

As I approached the bathroom door, the fine odour of glade filled my nostrils with pine and blossom, I would soon replace this with my own personal scent. I slowly pulled down my long johns and placed my cheeks onto the cold, unforgiving seat my whole legs spasmed uncontrolably.

I knew this was going to be a long session as i whipped out my phone and logged into tst, I gazed lovingly at the sw7 construction topic, at this precise moment, one small nugget dropped into the pool of water, it splashed my cheeks which made me feel at one with the toilet.

It was a long hard session, but after the wiping commenced I caressed the flush handle and tugged slowly, watching as my stinky Dave swirled away before my eyes, I suddenly felt upset that it was over no sooner than it had begun. Walking back into the front room I sat there with my family watching t.v all flushed in the face...sigh, back to normality..
 
I've no idea what topic i've stumbled into here.

Nonetheless, it's dirtier than SW7's construction site. Mucky stuff. :eek:
 
Re: Re: TST Loo Users... POO-NITE!

Adam James said:
I've no idea what topic i've stumbled into here.

Nonetheless, it's dirtier than SW7's construction site. Mucky stuff. :eek:
Click to expand...
I'll agree :p

Just dropping off an entire pig.....a result of 2 big bacon sarnies (brekky) and a massive pork sarnie (lunch)

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i had a bad tummy today so have been on the loo every half hour and i ate 3 eggs yesterday which made it even worse. think cow pat with the consistancy of a milk shake and the smell of a stink bomb
 
The low sun blasting through my toilet window, as I sit here doing the deed, is insane. I've never known it so bright. The whole window is a white-out to the eye, never mind a camera (not that I usually take a camera to the toilet with me...)
It's almost like some kind of epic nuclear explosion that won't turn off :p

It got me thinking, what's the worst possible thing that could happen when you are on the bog? Forget the postie knocking on your door, how about the whole side of your house being blown down, leaving you sitting there like a guilty animal, pants round yer ankles for the whole street to see?
 
it could be worse, at least it wasn't a sewer-gator swimming up the U bend and clamping on to your scrote.
 
What if that massive spider you'd normally find in your bath/sink got lost in the plumbing and managed to crawl it's way into the toilet bowl. Then hides under the rim until the time comes to wiggle his way to your crown jewels?
 
There are no words to discribe the emotion currently running down my inside leg.
 
Not really an image I wanted to have, mate. :p

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*ignores the above spider related conversation*

Do other people take their iPads/tablets to the loo for some forum browsing? Or am I the only one...


Sent from my iPhone using Tapatalk.
 
All the time. It's the 21st century equivalent of taking a newspaper with you.
 
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