Jonathan
TS Member
- Favourite Ride
- Helix <3
What’s going on here? Balsdon’s doing a trip report? Isn’t that one of the harbingers of the apocalypse? 
Jokes aside, I thought it was about time I did a trip report, as it’s been quite a while. I think this might be my first trip report since my first visit to EP way back in the summer of 2012! It was my first trip to EP since October 2017, and some attempts since then were aborted thanks to the pandemic and other holiday plans (which also ended up falling through). This trip saw myself, @Leigh, and @Poisson head over to Germany to ride some questionable coasters (and a Sunkid Butterfly or two), get on board some old planes, and see a frustrating search for some Bum Bum. We had a @MattyH join us the day before we flew out (flipping work screwing him over), and @Mike turned up at some point as well. Sit back, relax, and enjoy. I’ll review the new creds/rides I did at each place, as well as some additional comments where needed. Photos are all mine unless otherwise stated. Leigh and Poisson will be sharing their thoughts on each day as and when posted, including the silly things they did on the Tuesday.
Day 0 – Thursday 28th March (The travel down)
Not much to say about this, other than the journey down from Congleton to Southend was a bit perwigglous. The weather wasn’t great, for starters, and Google Maps decided to send me up via Leek and Ashbourne (and then cutting down to the A50 along the A515) instead of my expected route going along the A50 from Stoke. Still, it meant I avoided Stoke at rush hour, so that was a bonus. To be honest, any journey that avoids going anywhere near Stoke is a bonus in my book. After leaving my car in Lutterworth at my uncle’s place, where I was then picked up by Poisson, we made our way down towards Southend, with some weather that genuinely felt apocalyptic at points. Somefine Essex cuisine Maccies was consumed on the outskirts of Chelmsford before we arrived and promptly corpsed in our hovel Premier Inn.
Day 1 – Friday 29th March (Silly things in Essex)
Waking up the following morning, we were greeted by a delightful view of one of Southend’s most charming car parks. I mean, it could be worse.
How delightful. | Photo credit: Poisson
After checking out and wandering along the seafront awaiting the arrival of Holland and Leigh, the four of us ventured forth into Southend in search of a fine dining establishment for breakfast like the classy people we are. Oh, wait, we went to Wetherspoons. It was…fine, I guess, as Spoons go. Food consumed, we sallied forth for our first stop of the day – Adventure Island.
Adventure Island
I’d never been to Adventure Island before, and wasn’t hugely sure what to expect, but was pleasantly surprised to see that the place was relatively quiet, which did us a bit of a favour. Not a huge amount to say about the place, really.
Rage
I mean, it’s a Eurofighter. Acceptable. Bit janky in places, but I’ve been on far worse rides in the past.
I've been on worse.
Barnstormer
A custom Zierer Tivoli. Somewhat forgettable, really.
Green Scream
Another Zierer Tivoli. Not too bad, as these coasters go.
Kiddi Koasta
A Zamperla special. Feels like a slightly extended Wacky Worm, and nothing to really write home about.
Mighty Mini Mega
The first Pinfari of the trip. As Pinfaris go, it’s possibly one of the better ones I’ve ridden, but that’s really not saying much.
Total ride count for Adventure Island (+5 creds):
Clacton Pier
So, Clacton…Oh dear. The town just feels rather run-down in general (I’ve been told that nearby Jaywick is worse, presumably making Clacton itself feel like Alderley Edge or something), and the pier isn’t much of an improvement. The wood on the pier itself is rather uneven in places, the toilets down the far end are grim (seriously, the urinals look ancient), and…Well, I just don’t like it.
Looping Star
This looks to be the first looping Pinfari I’ve done (we’ll ignore Indiana Jones at DLP, as while that was a Pinfari design, it was actually built by Intamin), and…Ouch. This was painful. One of the worst coasters I’ve done. It actually caused me a bit of pain on my right hip for a few days afterwards. Not fun.
PAIN. | Photo credit: Poisson
Wild Mouse Coaster
It’s a DPV Rides Wacky Worm. Nothing more to say, really.
Total ride count for Clacton Pier (+2 creds):
Clacton Pavilion
This is tiny, and like the other places we visited, it was completely dead. Just the one cred here, despite what RCDB said at the time (though this was subsequently corrected by Poisson). The mini-golf course is fun, and the pirate ship is decent, though we weren’t exactly expecting the restraints to be released by a screwdriver. I’m not even joking. The ride op genuinely got a screwdriver out of the cabin to release the restraints.
Shark Coaster
An SBF Visa Wacky Worm that requires the op to push the train out of the station isn’t good. What’s also not good is the drop out of the station itself, which just feels really violent.
Total ride count for Clacton Pavilion (+1 cred):
Jokes aside, I thought it was about time I did a trip report, as it’s been quite a while. I think this might be my first trip report since my first visit to EP way back in the summer of 2012! It was my first trip to EP since October 2017, and some attempts since then were aborted thanks to the pandemic and other holiday plans (which also ended up falling through). This trip saw myself, @Leigh, and @Poisson head over to Germany to ride some questionable coasters (and a Sunkid Butterfly or two), get on board some old planes, and see a frustrating search for some Bum Bum. We had a @MattyH join us the day before we flew out (flipping work screwing him over), and @Mike turned up at some point as well. Sit back, relax, and enjoy. I’ll review the new creds/rides I did at each place, as well as some additional comments where needed. Photos are all mine unless otherwise stated. Leigh and Poisson will be sharing their thoughts on each day as and when posted, including the silly things they did on the Tuesday.
Day 0 – Thursday 28th March (The travel down)
Not much to say about this, other than the journey down from Congleton to Southend was a bit perwigglous. The weather wasn’t great, for starters, and Google Maps decided to send me up via Leek and Ashbourne (and then cutting down to the A50 along the A515) instead of my expected route going along the A50 from Stoke. Still, it meant I avoided Stoke at rush hour, so that was a bonus. To be honest, any journey that avoids going anywhere near Stoke is a bonus in my book. After leaving my car in Lutterworth at my uncle’s place, where I was then picked up by Poisson, we made our way down towards Southend, with some weather that genuinely felt apocalyptic at points. Some
Day 1 – Friday 29th March (Silly things in Essex)
Waking up the following morning, we were greeted by a delightful view of one of Southend’s most charming car parks. I mean, it could be worse.
How delightful. | Photo credit: Poisson
After checking out and wandering along the seafront awaiting the arrival of Holland and Leigh, the four of us ventured forth into Southend in search of a fine dining establishment for breakfast like the classy people we are. Oh, wait, we went to Wetherspoons.
It was…fine, I guess, as Spoons go. Food consumed, we sallied forth for our first stop of the day – Adventure Island.Adventure Island
I’d never been to Adventure Island before, and wasn’t hugely sure what to expect, but was pleasantly surprised to see that the place was relatively quiet, which did us a bit of a favour. Not a huge amount to say about the place, really.
Rage
I mean, it’s a Eurofighter. Acceptable. Bit janky in places, but I’ve been on far worse rides in the past.
I've been on worse.
Barnstormer
A custom Zierer Tivoli. Somewhat forgettable, really.
Green Scream
Another Zierer Tivoli. Not too bad, as these coasters go.
Kiddi Koasta
A Zamperla special. Feels like a slightly extended Wacky Worm, and nothing to really write home about.
Mighty Mini Mega
The first Pinfari of the trip. As Pinfaris go, it’s possibly one of the better ones I’ve ridden, but that’s really not saying much.
Total ride count for Adventure Island (+5 creds):
- Rage x1
- Barnstormer x1
- Mighty Mini Mega x1
- Sea Dragon x1
- Kiddi Koasta x1
- Sk8boarda x1
- Whip x1
- Adventureville x1
- Smiles per Galleon x1
- Green Scream x1
- Spooksville x1
Clacton Pier
So, Clacton…Oh dear. The town just feels rather run-down in general (I’ve been told that nearby Jaywick is worse, presumably making Clacton itself feel like Alderley Edge or something), and the pier isn’t much of an improvement. The wood on the pier itself is rather uneven in places, the toilets down the far end are grim (seriously, the urinals look ancient), and…Well, I just don’t like it.
Looping Star
This looks to be the first looping Pinfari I’ve done (we’ll ignore Indiana Jones at DLP, as while that was a Pinfari design, it was actually built by Intamin), and…Ouch. This was painful. One of the worst coasters I’ve done. It actually caused me a bit of pain on my right hip for a few days afterwards. Not fun.
PAIN. | Photo credit: Poisson
Wild Mouse Coaster
It’s a DPV Rides Wacky Worm. Nothing more to say, really.
Total ride count for Clacton Pier (+2 creds):
- Looping Star x1
- Wild Mouse Coaster x1
Clacton Pavilion
This is tiny, and like the other places we visited, it was completely dead. Just the one cred here, despite what RCDB said at the time (though this was subsequently corrected by Poisson). The mini-golf course is fun, and the pirate ship is decent, though we weren’t exactly expecting the restraints to be released by a screwdriver. I’m not even joking. The ride op genuinely got a screwdriver out of the cabin to release the restraints.
Shark Coaster
An SBF Visa Wacky Worm that requires the op to push the train out of the station isn’t good. What’s also not good is the drop out of the station itself, which just feels really violent.
Total ride count for Clacton Pavilion (+1 cred):
- Shark Coaster x2
- Crazy Golf x1
- Pirate Ship x1
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Still, it at least got us from A to B, and we did manage to max it out at 191km/h. We weren’t going to EP first of all, though. Oh no. Instead, we were going to do something very different indeed – visit Technik Museum Sinsheim.
