Alix
TS Member
- Favourite Ride
- The Swarm or Oblivion
Arrived by 9 and made the mistake of trying to walk past smiler… @Chimpy being the primate she is couldn’t bear to walk past it as it’s her favourite ride so we loitered by the single rider queue before it was open, and before it was even testing 
Got on almost as soon as queue opened - SRQ is magic. (Or so we thought)
What we saw of the queue line is no different to what others have reported - it’s all looking a bit grubby and worn. We ended up in same cart, Chimp was row 2 and I was 4. Ride was fairly jolty but didn’t cause a headache. Chimp’s fave ride done we wandered over to Twistatron which was walk on. And sit and wait for more people to arrive. And wait a bit longer. When another group turned up we finally got going. As someone who’s not a fan of going round and round I didn’t find it too bad. Wouldn’t have been worth queueing for though.
puke rating 1/3
Next was Oblivion with a 5 minute queue which was actually 5 minutes. Front row; love Oblivion, mist, screens and everything else was working.
Next was Spin Jam. I was determined to do these just to tick them off, but as I don’t like going round and round these are never going to be re rideable. on the puke-ometer
Next we wandered over to the dark forest. Rita was on 40 minutes so we joined 13 which was on 20. Queue actually took 25 plus a 10 minute pause - something to do with restraints it seemed. Rita was closed by the time we came out, so we headed off across park towards forbidden valley. Galactica was advertising a 20 minute queue. Funk n Fly queue round the block so we went for Galactica. Advertised a 20 minute queue and we were on just over 20 minutes. The whole queue line was open so after a bit of a hike we reached the station. Both stations were running, only delay was being held outside the station face down which is a bit uncomfortable.
Next we did Blade and Funk n Fly - Blade has memories for me as when we were small my mum had to ask the ride op to stop it to let my brother off as he was about the throw up - of course I’ll never let him forget that. Funk and fly wasn’t great, Chimp turned slightly green so on the pukeometer.
We then spotted Shawn and Charlotte while we were on the Nemesis Observation Deck before heading off to queue for Sub Terra. Queue was only 25 minutes so we joined with the plan that Chimpy would ditch me at the batching point. Unlike Ghost Train, she stuck with that plan and I did ST by myself. All in all it wasn’t bad - I had read spoilers so was prepared for the faff before the drop, but I wasn’t prepared for the faff after the drop when it took so long to release the restraints that the video had recycled back to the welcome screen. I think Chimp would have coped with ST up to the leaving in the lift section - I was fine with it (although it’s a bit weird doing these things as a singleton) - but the sudden dark etc would possibly have been a bit much for her.
We then wandered round to Curse. It didn’t start well as the grave digger made a bee line for chimpy and those who know her know the Chimp does not dig actors. After trotting briskly into the queue line, we had a wander round looking at the grave stones. On entering the house the Chimp got worried, and in the main room she bailed leaving me to go on alone. The ride itself was good I thought. Trommel was working with heat, the Emily effects seemed to be timed properly, I didn’t spot any daylight leaking in but I also didn’t spot the duck. Will try and ride again before we go home tomorrow. Chimpy was bothered again by the grave digger until she took refuge in the shop. The Chimp has a face actors love to scare
After Curse we went round to Katanga Canyon and joined a 35 minute queue for the runaway mine train. Mine train did not disappoint - it’s always a fun ride. After RMT we headed over to River Rapids. Both waterfalls were on, and we got soggy bums but that was about it.
Next was Wickerman. Queue felt very long and hot but the ride itself was brilliant and felt really fast. Just as we got off there was a huge crack of lightning and rumble or thunder which apparently knocked out all the electrics and the park effectively shut at 5pm. We hung around til 6 having a drink and hoping something might reopen but it was not to be.
After a night in our premier inn, we set off next morning to get to towers by 9ish. We walked straight to Rita as we’d not been able to ride the day before. We got on straight away on opening, front row then went straight back round to ride again. By the time we got off 13 was still closed so we headed off to David Walliams as this was not open when we last visited in 2019. We went on Flávio’s which was ok just oneon the pukeometer and then headed for Gangsta Granny. It was ok. Chimp likes the books so she enjoyed it, and with no queue it was fine.
We spoke with Raj’s assistant and a beefeater (some actors are ok innChimpy’s opinion) and then wandered off looking for the next short-ish queue, hampered slightly by my phone losing internet for most of the day. Smiler was advertising 100m queue, but Chimp is SQEP (suitably qualified & experienced personnel) in single riding so we joined that queue and were on in 56 seconds. We were on row 2 and 4 respectively and it felt not too bad. Went straight on again chimp got row 1 and I got 3. Row 3 felt very rattly. Chimp was happy with her row 1, especially as the “bigger boys” sharing the row were scared and she was not. I decided it best not to remind her of her Ghost Train performance the other week.
We then wandered off in search of lunch as my cunning plan of grabbing a sarnie from Asda was scuppered due to no vegan options and nothing Chimp friendly either. Welcome Inn wasn’t open but we grabbed a hot dog each and sat under the covers watching the ducks. No sign of any cats unfortunately. We then walked to the Curse, with chimpy not sure if she was going to do it or not. She managed it; I got a decent mug and then we headed towards Sub Terra. Queue was quite large and Chimp hadn’t quite psyched herself up so we went for a cup of tea and waited for the latest shower to dry up.
We then went back Sub Terra as the app said 35 minutes, but the queue host said 55 so we carried on back to curse. Now she’s done it, Chimp is the curse’s biggest fan so we ended up doing it another couple of times.
If you were the single bloke sitting with us at about 130pm I apologise for the 2 loons behind you pointing everything out to each other, getting over excited in the trommel (“how does it DO that?” Says chimp) and squeaking “DUCK!!” when we saw the duck.
All the big rides had silly queues by then so we decided to join Wickerman at 55 minutes and hope for the best. Queue was about 60 minutes in the end so not too bad.
Still scuppered by lack of internet, we ended up wandering aimlessly looking for short queues and dodging showers.
Oblivion had 5 minutes so we jumped on that, second row this time and left on the brake run in the rain.
Chimp was missing Smiler so we headed into the SRQ which was heaving. 55 minutes this time but there’s no negotiating with a chimp who needs to be marmalised.
After this, we walked back to Sub Terra as Chimp was feeling brave enough to give it a go. It was on 15 minutes, and there was much less faff this time round. Chimp coped well with the dark and the actor was suitably underwhelming so she gave it an 8/10.
To finish the day, we headed off to Galactica, and although the whole queue line was open, we were on really quickly. By the time we got off it was 5:55 so we did our traditional run round to get back on as our last ride. Just managed it which made the Chimp very happy.
Overall, an enjoyable trip, although school trips and poor weather did put a bit of a crimp in the day we were still able to get on plenty. Next trip is booked for August when we’re taking the nephew (2) and niece (7) so will be a very different day out.
Vegan options at Towers are poor compared to Thorpe. No cakes, and vegan magnums only on sale on Tower Street. Hopefully that’ll improve as time goes by as it’s not as niche a requirement as it once was.
Ride count:
Smiler 3
Twistatron 1
Oblivion 2
Spin jam 1
13 1
Galactica 3
Blade 1
Funk n fly 1
Sub Terra 2
Curse 5
RMT 1
River Rapids 1
Wickerman 2
Rita 2
Flávio’s 1
Gangster Granny 1
(Photo is of the only cat we spotted all day)
Got on almost as soon as queue opened - SRQ is magic. (Or so we thought)
What we saw of the queue line is no different to what others have reported - it’s all looking a bit grubby and worn. We ended up in same cart, Chimp was row 2 and I was 4. Ride was fairly jolty but didn’t cause a headache. Chimp’s fave ride done we wandered over to Twistatron which was walk on. And sit and wait for more people to arrive. And wait a bit longer. When another group turned up we finally got going. As someone who’s not a fan of going round and round I didn’t find it too bad. Wouldn’t have been worth queueing for though.
puke rating 1/3Next was Oblivion with a 5 minute queue which was actually 5 minutes. Front row; love Oblivion, mist, screens and everything else was working.
Next was Spin Jam. I was determined to do these just to tick them off, but as I don’t like going round and round these are never going to be re rideable.
on the puke-ometerNext we wandered over to the dark forest. Rita was on 40 minutes so we joined 13 which was on 20. Queue actually took 25 plus a 10 minute pause - something to do with restraints it seemed. Rita was closed by the time we came out, so we headed off across park towards forbidden valley. Galactica was advertising a 20 minute queue. Funk n Fly queue round the block so we went for Galactica. Advertised a 20 minute queue and we were on just over 20 minutes. The whole queue line was open so after a bit of a hike we reached the station. Both stations were running, only delay was being held outside the station face down which is a bit uncomfortable.
Next we did Blade and Funk n Fly - Blade has memories for me as when we were small my mum had to ask the ride op to stop it to let my brother off as he was about the throw up - of course I’ll never let him forget that. Funk and fly wasn’t great, Chimp turned slightly green so
on the pukeometer.We then spotted Shawn and Charlotte while we were on the Nemesis Observation Deck before heading off to queue for Sub Terra. Queue was only 25 minutes so we joined with the plan that Chimpy would ditch me at the batching point. Unlike Ghost Train, she stuck with that plan and I did ST by myself. All in all it wasn’t bad - I had read spoilers so was prepared for the faff before the drop, but I wasn’t prepared for the faff after the drop when it took so long to release the restraints that the video had recycled back to the welcome screen. I think Chimp would have coped with ST up to the leaving in the lift section - I was fine with it (although it’s a bit weird doing these things as a singleton) - but the sudden dark etc would possibly have been a bit much for her.
We then wandered round to Curse. It didn’t start well as the grave digger made a bee line for chimpy and those who know her know the Chimp does not dig actors. After trotting briskly into the queue line, we had a wander round looking at the grave stones. On entering the house the Chimp got worried, and in the main room she bailed leaving me to go on alone. The ride itself was good I thought. Trommel was working with heat, the Emily effects seemed to be timed properly, I didn’t spot any daylight leaking in but I also didn’t spot the duck. Will try and ride again before we go home tomorrow. Chimpy was bothered again by the grave digger until she took refuge in the shop. The Chimp has a face actors love to scare
After Curse we went round to Katanga Canyon and joined a 35 minute queue for the runaway mine train. Mine train did not disappoint - it’s always a fun ride. After RMT we headed over to River Rapids. Both waterfalls were on, and we got soggy bums but that was about it.
Next was Wickerman. Queue felt very long and hot but the ride itself was brilliant and felt really fast. Just as we got off there was a huge crack of lightning and rumble or thunder which apparently knocked out all the electrics and the park effectively shut at 5pm. We hung around til 6 having a drink and hoping something might reopen but it was not to be.
After a night in our premier inn, we set off next morning to get to towers by 9ish. We walked straight to Rita as we’d not been able to ride the day before. We got on straight away on opening, front row then went straight back round to ride again. By the time we got off 13 was still closed so we headed off to David Walliams as this was not open when we last visited in 2019. We went on Flávio’s which was ok just one
on the pukeometer and then headed for Gangsta Granny. It was ok. Chimp likes the books so she enjoyed it, and with no queue it was fine.We spoke with Raj’s assistant and a beefeater (some actors are ok innChimpy’s opinion) and then wandered off looking for the next short-ish queue, hampered slightly by my phone losing internet for most of the day. Smiler was advertising 100m queue, but Chimp is SQEP (suitably qualified & experienced personnel) in single riding so we joined that queue and were on in 56 seconds. We were on row 2 and 4 respectively and it felt not too bad. Went straight on again chimp got row 1 and I got 3. Row 3 felt very rattly. Chimp was happy with her row 1, especially as the “bigger boys” sharing the row were scared and she was not. I decided it best not to remind her of her Ghost Train performance the other week.
We then wandered off in search of lunch as my cunning plan of grabbing a sarnie from Asda was scuppered due to no vegan options and nothing Chimp friendly either. Welcome Inn wasn’t open but we grabbed a hot dog each and sat under the covers watching the ducks. No sign of any cats unfortunately. We then walked to the Curse, with chimpy not sure if she was going to do it or not. She managed it; I got a decent mug and then we headed towards Sub Terra. Queue was quite large and Chimp hadn’t quite psyched herself up so we went for a cup of tea and waited for the latest shower to dry up.
We then went back Sub Terra as the app said 35 minutes, but the queue host said 55 so we carried on back to curse. Now she’s done it, Chimp is the curse’s biggest fan so we ended up doing it another couple of times.
If you were the single bloke sitting with us at about 130pm I apologise for the 2 loons behind you pointing everything out to each other, getting over excited in the trommel (“how does it DO that?” Says chimp) and squeaking “DUCK!!” when we saw the duck.
All the big rides had silly queues by then so we decided to join Wickerman at 55 minutes and hope for the best. Queue was about 60 minutes in the end so not too bad.
Still scuppered by lack of internet, we ended up wandering aimlessly looking for short queues and dodging showers.
Oblivion had 5 minutes so we jumped on that, second row this time and left on the brake run in the rain.
Chimp was missing Smiler so we headed into the SRQ which was heaving. 55 minutes this time but there’s no negotiating with a chimp who needs to be marmalised.
After this, we walked back to Sub Terra as Chimp was feeling brave enough to give it a go. It was on 15 minutes, and there was much less faff this time round. Chimp coped well with the dark and the actor was suitably underwhelming so she gave it an 8/10.
To finish the day, we headed off to Galactica, and although the whole queue line was open, we were on really quickly. By the time we got off it was 5:55 so we did our traditional run round to get back on as our last ride. Just managed it which made the Chimp very happy.
Overall, an enjoyable trip, although school trips and poor weather did put a bit of a crimp in the day we were still able to get on plenty. Next trip is booked for August when we’re taking the nephew (2) and niece (7) so will be a very different day out.
Vegan options at Towers are poor compared to Thorpe. No cakes, and vegan magnums only on sale on Tower Street. Hopefully that’ll improve as time goes by as it’s not as niche a requirement as it once was.
Ride count:
Smiler 3
Twistatron 1
Oblivion 2
Spin jam 1
13 1
Galactica 3
Blade 1
Funk n fly 1
Sub Terra 2
Curse 5
RMT 1
River Rapids 1
Wickerman 2
Rita 2
Flávio’s 1
Gangster Granny 1
(Photo is of the only cat we spotted all day)
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