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Wiki

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You should write up some more humours of the parks and attractions on the Wiki page, it'd be funny to see how they built the Wicker Man like for e.g they used ice cream sticks to build the structure; that'd be quite funny, I have read the 'FAIL' Park and others I enjoy reading, I would read it in Tom Baker's voice (Little Britain) to get my humour up, it does need some updating. You could write up about Europa Park and their rides.

"It is not as smoky as Oblivion's Hole." - Another sample for Wicker Man ride on wiki page.
 
MichaelTowers2001 said:
You should write up some more humours of the parks and attractions on the Wiki page, it'd be funny to see how they built the Wicker Man like for e.g they used ice cream sticks to build the structure; that'd be quite funny, I have read the 'FAIL' Park and others I enjoy reading, I would read it in Tom Baker's voice (Little Britain) to get my humour up, it does need some updating. You could write up about Europa Park and their rides.

"It is not as smoky as Oblivion's Hole." - Another sample for Wicker Man ride on wiki page.
Click to expand...
The team do not update the wiki, and it is down to the membership to contribute to it as and when they like. So feel free to write up these articles! :)
 
My favourite Wiki thing:
  • Earl: WTF you doin' on the road, crazy bint?
  • Crone: Gimme your money plskthnx.
  • Earl: Ahahahahah. No.
  • Crone: I'm government, ya git, tax. Oh and I curse a local tree.
  • Earl: Oh shiz.
or, re: CATCF "Appropriately enough, the ride opened on April 1st 2006.".
 
I love the Wiki! It makes for some very entertaining reading! Some of my personal favourite Wiki quotes include:
  • (The restraints are again, typical of this type of ride. In that they are designed for children and people with eating disorders under 5 foot tall. Any normal sized adult will have real difficulty in getting the lap bar past their knees, never mind closing it with "two clicks". It is not unknown to see perfectly reasonably proportioned people have to take "the walk of shame", just because the ride's designers never thought to allow for those who may enjoy the odd pie with their ale.

    Once seated, your only hope of getting the bar closed is to perform the kind of contortion usually seen only in Circ De Soleil. Unless you have Russian blood, this can be tricky. You usually end up with your legs crossed in a very un-natural way.

    To add to the awkwardness of the situation, the cars do not stop to let passengers on or off. Like a Routemaster bus, you are expected to leap on as it trundles past you. Just like a shark, if the cars ever stop moving, they will die. For this reason, it is imperative that you board quickly and get your lap bar locked before reaching the end of the station. Make no mistake, the car will start the ride whether you are secured or not! The staff do their best to prevent you being flung out of the car by placing their hands very close to your crotch as you move past them. If they find an un-secured restraint, they will grab you by the goolies and pull you out before the car leaves the station. This may sound painful, but it could save your life.) (Spinball Whizzer)
  • (Once back in the station, the lap bar will ‘click’ and, if you are a child, it will release. Most adults will have to prise it out of their gut with a crowbar. The staff keep one in the booth for these occasions, and are always ready to help. Once released, you generally fall face first into the exit platform, after being pushed out of the car by the next eager rider.) (Spinball Whizzer)
  • (https://towersstreet.com/wiki/Splash_Landings_Hotel) (The whole page about SLH)
  • (This ride appears to be nothing more than the impromptu and accidental love child of The Frog Hopper and Runaway Mine Train, conceived following half a can of cider during an emotional school prom, discarded to fend for itself in woodland once reserved for duelling Schwarzkopfs and cross-valley woodies and unearthed during excavations for a tombstone marking the departure of the marketing director following not so much shooting themselves in the foot, but blowing off all four limbs after climbing inside an unexploded world war II bomb and promptly being left lying in the mud, swallowing the occasional passing slug in order to survive.) (Thirteen)
  • (A husky female voice demands that you "Assume the position!" The correct response here is "Yes mistress!". Or, depending what you're into, "Woof!") (Air)
  • (It is usually around this time, when you are staring at the brick paving underneath you, that you start to question the strength of the restraints. Rest assured that if your rubber gimp vest fails, your feet will still be secured by the love cuffs, causing you to crash face first into the floor. And maybe break your ankles.

    But this is very rare.) (Air)
So yeah, I really love the Wiki!

 
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