• ℹ️ Heads up...

    This is a popular topic that is fast moving Guest - before posting, please ensure that you check out the first post in the topic for a quick reminder of guidelines, and importantly a summary of the known facts and information so far. Thanks.

You know you are old when ...

Only one day to recover?
Can take me three now after a heavy session.
Non binary means Sam Smith is neither a 1 or a 0.
That makes him greater than 1, or less than 0.
Personally, I find him as a bit of a number 2.
Even though I purchased his first album within days of hearing it.

And remember, non binary is real and out there.
Boys can have periods...if you go to school in Brighton.
 
Oh, right, I'm not getting older after all.
I'm getting younger.
A lot younger.
Went to buy a newspaper and two packets of cigarette papers yesterday afternoon at a local shop.
ID please?
What?
ID please!
Not got any sorry.

As a few on here know, I'm a full four decades over the legal age to buy cigarette papers, I'm fat, grey and wrinkly, and it would take a million pounds of special effects latex and make up magicry to make me look thirty, never mind eighteen.

My wife nearly soiled her pad laughing...
 
Oh, right, I'm not getting older after all.
I'm getting younger.
A lot younger.
Went to buy a newspaper and two packets of cigarette papers yesterday afternoon at a local shop.
ID please?
What?
ID please!
Not got any sorry.

As a few on here know, I'm a full four decades over the legal age to buy cigarette papers, I'm fat, grey and wrinkly, and it would take a million pounds of special effects latex and make up magicry to make me look thirty, never mind eighteen.

My wife nearly soiled her pad laughing...

Is there age restriction on paper or just the actually tobacco
 
Oh, right, I'm not getting older after all.
I'm getting younger.
A lot younger.
Went to buy a newspaper and two packets of cigarette papers yesterday afternoon at a local shop.
ID please?
What?
ID please!
Not got any sorry.

As a few on here know, I'm a full four decades over the legal age to buy cigarette papers, I'm fat, grey and wrinkly, and it would take a million pounds of special effects latex and make up magicry to make me look thirty, never mind eighteen.

My wife nearly soiled her pad laughing...

Happens to me all the time, take it as a compliment
 
It's when a 18yr old ask for ID and they don't believe a paper driving licence is a driving licence.


Sent from my SM-J600FN using Tapatalk
 
My first 'real' job after working the graveyard shift in the Spar was updating the information super highway that was Ceefax at BBC Manchester, covering the North West and Isle of Man. If someone's wing mirror got knocked off, it was my job to tell the people using 24 rows by 40 columns of characters.

Today the BBC announced that the spiritual successor to Ceefax, the 'Red Button' is to be switched off from early 2020.

"This internet thing will never take off", they said.
 
Ah, good old BBC Micros. My primary had a couple. None of the teachers knew what to do with them. We just played various games and they didn't know any better.

I remember when Tesco first did "computers for schools", we were able to get some kind of Acorn. However, this was so prized that no-one was actually allowed to use it at all. I doubt it was ever turned on.

Fast forward a few decades to when I last worked at Television Center before it shut down, huge chunks of it's infastructure were still running on Micros and Acorns. Because they worked. Couldn't say the same for the more modern kit that ran on windows and crashed daily.
 
At what age does it become acceptable to fart in public?
Quote from one of my (sadly deceased) customers...whose son was a g.p., and gave this advice.
Never trust a fart over fifty.
The chances of "following through" double every year...I still risk it.
Nothing worse than holding them in...it can make you deaf you know...too much internal pressure...can make your eyes bulge as well...
 
As a kid, I had a serious crush on Wednesday Adams...
... As and adult, I still have a thing for Christina Ricci (she's my age, shuddup, it's not what it sounds like)...
...
But these days... Morticia is looking pretty damn hot...

Yeah, Cinema Sins just uploaded their Adams Family riff. Sorrynotsorry.
 
Yeah, let's be clear here, Angelica Huston will unfortunately always give me "Grand High Witch" nightmares.
But you gotta admit, she did OWN Morticia back in the day.
 
Top