The I Feel Down Topic.

[Alsty]

I must admit I find it bizarre how religion is still permitted as an excuse for discrimination. People use it as a shield for their prejudice(s).

 

[delta79]

I have a hate for MET, however they are so fun to debate (read argue) with. E.g. how long were the first 4 days of creation, as the sun was not made until the 4th day.
They are the hard line of the church and some are complete genitals.

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[Jonathan]

I have a hate for MET, however they are so fun to debate (read argue) with. E.g. how long were the first 4 days of creation, as the sun was not made until the 4th day.
They are the hard line of the church and some are complete genitals.

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My dad is MET's 'Development Worker'. How d'you think I feel being stuck living with him? I have no energy to debate anything with him, as he just has to be right about everything. He also has a burgeoning dislike for anyone/anything remotely left-wing, but that's another story. When the Methodist Conference voted to approve SSM last year, a number of evangelicals who support the 'traditional' view of marriage called for unity moving forward. Not MET. They doubled down on their position quite quickly, and I feel as though they've become even more hardline & uncompromising since then.

 

[delta79]

My dad is MET's 'Development Worker'. How d'you think I feel being stuck living with him?

To be honest, i can't comprehend how you feel. Especially now i know your dad a MET.

When i hear some MET saying homosexually should be outlawed with the only sentence being death.
Yes, you did read that right. Some believe gays and lesbians should be killed. The rest think they should be chemically/physically castrated. And kept locked away from polite society so they don't infected the pure with there sinful ways.

I felt sick just writing that.
These attitudes and the fire and brimstone talk, made me leave the church and really think about my relationship with god.

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[Jonathan]

To be honest, i can't comprehend how you feel. Especially now i know your dad a MET.

When i hear some MET saying homosexually should be outlawed with the only sentence being death.
Yes, you did read that right. Some believe gays and lesbians should be killed. The rest think they should be chemically/physically castrated. And kept locked away from polite society so they don't infected the pure with there sinful ways.

I felt sick just writing that.
These attitudes and the fire and brimstone talk, made me leave the church and really think about my relationship with god.

Sent from my SM-A217F using Tapatalk

It honestly wouldn't surprise me if some of the feedback my minister received prior to the meeting had similar content. If any of it had been read out or voiced, then I would've been absolutely horrified, and I think I would've found it incredibly difficult to not lose it. I'd be intrigued to know what's said at some MET meetings regarding homosexuality, but I also don't want to know at the same time, if that makes sense.

I just consider myself lucky to have a minister who's affirming and supportive, a brother who understands my position (though not the full story quite yet), and two affirming & supportive friends at church. If I didn't have them, I'd find things a bit more of a struggle.

 

[rob666]

I've held my faith all my life, having being brought up "strict church" into my late teens.
I still hold a strong belief in God, but gave up on church before I turned twenty.
Nasty back biting hard right bothersome troublemakers, wrapped in envy and hatred for their fellow man.
The rollercoaster community I find far more Christian.
Sweet suburban parish is it mate?
They tend to be the worst!

 

[Jonathan]

I've held my faith all my life, having being brought up "strict church" into my late teens.
I still hold a strong belief in God, but gave up on church before I turned twenty.
Nasty back biting hard right bothersome troublemakers, wrapped in envy and hatred for their fellow man.
The rollercoaster community I find far more Christian.
Sweet suburban parish is it mate?
They tend to be the worst!

All I can say is my church is very divided on the issue. Some are quite strongly in favour of SSM, and some are quite strongly against it. The hope is that as time goes on, it'll be seen as more normalised once more churches make decisions on it either way, plus we may be able to have a better consultation process. In addition to anonymous submissions, I wouldn't potentially be averse to an open meeting where people can share in person, but that could also come with its own issues. One positive that came from last night, though, involved a WhatsApp conversation with my older brother (he's the one who's also a Methodist minister). One of his churches has passed the resolutions on SSM with a huge majority, and another of his churches is due to be making initial decisions soon as well. I guess one way people's views might change is if there were openly gay people at my church. There aren't any at the moment, but what I do know is I'm not the only gay person at my church...

 

[Skyscraper]

left the building that the library I volunteer at is in earlier... and genuinely thought me or my driver was going to get hit by a guy holding a walking stick/cane. They lunged at a car but missed literally when we were walking past!
Such a dodgy area it is.

 

[Matt N]

This is probably going to sound not worthy of this thread, so apologies if this seems small fry compared to other problems, but today, I went to the dentist for the first time post-COVID (my last appointment was on 13th March 2020, just before it all escalated), and while the appointment went as well as it could probably have gone, I left feeling a bit deflated, as my dentist seemed thoroughly cheesed off with me.

For clarity; I have somewhat eroded enamel that I gained from drinking Diet Coke a lot in my later childhood and early teens (although I wouldn’t say that I have major dental erosion by any means; my teeth are absolutely fine apart from some very minor sensitivity, and the erosion has seemingly never progressed beyond some surface level enamel erosion), and ever so slightly chipped front teeth (although I’ve had these for about as long as I can remember; since I was a fairly young child, even), but I have no fillings and have never had any major dental work done.

Don’t get me wrong, I’d say the appointment went quite well compared to how it could have gone. He said that my enamel didn’t seem to have eroded any more since my last visit, I had no holes, and he didn’t even need to use his scraping device because he said I was “brushing well”!

However, he still seemed to be throughly annoyed with me and the state of my teeth. Now I should say that I have drastically cut down my Diet Coke intake since he first pointed out my enamel erosion (water now makes up the vast majority of what I drink), and when I drink anything that isn’t water, I now take precautions to protect my teeth; I drink through a metal drinking straw to lower the exposure, and I always have a glass of water directly afterwards to dilute the acids and prevent damage. He asked me if I was “still on the Coke”, and I said about how I’ve drastically cut down my intake of anything that isn’t water and started taking precautions when drinking such drinks. However, he seemed thoroughly dismissive, saying that “any Coke is too much”, and at the end of the appointment when he came to greet my mum (who was waiting in the waiting room, as I’ll be honest, I was so anxious before I went in I nearly cried), he gave us both a proper finger-wagging and telling off.

I also felt very stupid in there, like I was constantly doing things wrong. I think he could tell I was nervous, and I felt bad for being nervous because after he greeted me, asked me how I was etc., he said to me rather flippantly “calm down; just sit down so I can get started”; I don’t think I was supposed to be nervous. I also had my first ever mouth x-ray (he wanted to check for my wisdom teeth, as well as for any internal tooth problems), and I’ll be honest, I didn’t respond overly well to it. I initially didn’t get it in my mouth correctly, and then I started gagging, and I felt very bad, because I could sense he was feeling pretty short with me; he kept tutting and sighing, and saying “relax, “bite” and “breathe through your nose” in a very short tone of voice… I felt so stupid.

I know this sounds like a stupid and inconsequential thing to share, but I felt throughly deflated, and I now feel like I’m truly stupid and have absolutely terrible teeth…

 

[JAperson]

@Matt N I've recently had too fillings done, and the dentist gave me a telling off despite the fact that I clean my teeth as I should and attempt to look after them. I just think they give you the rant about not cleaning your teeth whenever you go.

 

[Matt N]

@Matt N I've recently had too fillings done, and the dentist gave me a telling off despite the fact that I clean my teeth as I should and attempt to look after them. I just think they give you the rant about not cleaning your teeth whenever you go.

Perhaps that’s just their default position? I have no fillings whatsoever (albeit I do have some dental erosion), but I never leave feeling like he’s very happy with me…

 

[Alastair]

Perhaps that’s just their default position? I have no fillings whatsoever (albeit I do have some dental erosion), but I never leave feeling like he’s very happy with me…

Take your custom elsewhere. I know I would if (I assume) you're paying the typical extortionate dentist fee to be seen to by a miserable sod like him! Their job is to assess and fix, with a bit of advice thrown in - not judge the most minor flaws.

 

[Matt N]

Take your custom elsewhere. I know I would if (I assume) you're paying the typical extortionate dentist fee to be seen to by a miserable sod like him! Their job is to assess and fix, with a bit of advice thrown in - not judge the most minor flaws.

I don’t think it’s my dentist that’s the issue; I think it’s me acting stupid and having poor teeth rather than him. He’s always been very good and pleasant, and I’ve been seeing him since I was a young boy. My whole family sees him.

And even if I did want to change dentist (I don’t), I live in a rural area that isn’t exactly awash with choice. I think he might be the only NHS-covered dentist within our immediate area; I think any other local dentists are private, which I assume incurs larger fees. I still narrowly qualify for free dental treatment, being in university and not turning 19 until July, but I think our NHS dentist’s lowest band of treatment (a checkup) is only about £20.

Looking at the price list did make me glad I don’t have any major dental problems, though… band 3 treatment was nearly £300!

 

[JAperson]

I don’t think it’s my dentist that’s the issue; I think it’s me acting stupid and having poor teeth rather than him. He’s always been very good and pleasant, and I’ve been seeing him since I was a young boy. My whole family sees him.

That doesn't mean he's a good dentist, being rude isn't helpful. In the past 5 years I've seen so many dentists (had braces) and I can tell you now if they are being rude they're crap, I've had some good dentists and some bad dentists. If he's being rude you should go somewhere else. Your teeth might not be in the best shape, but thatt doesn't mean he should talk to you like that.

And even if I did want to change dentist (I don’t), I live in a rural area that isn’t exactly awash with choice. I think he might be the only NHS-covered dentist within our immediate area; I think any other local dentists are private, which I assume incurs larger fees. I still narrowly qualify for free dental treatment, being in university and not turning 19 until July, but I think our NHS dentist’s lowest band of treatment (a checkup) is only about £20.

that's a shame, perhaps there is another NHS dentist somewhere not that far away.

Looking at the price list did make me glad I don’t have any major dental problems, though… band 3 treatment was nearly £300!

They'll find any little problem to charge you (or the NHS) that money. You've got to remember that's how they pay there bills. Still they shouldn't be allowed to charge that much, well actually dental care should really be covered on the NHS.

 

[NuttySquirrel]

@Matt N, I think you're thinking about this all wrong and being far too down on yourself. Dentists will always tell you you're doing something wrong - I've been told I eat too much chocolate, drink too much tea, floss too vigorously, don't floss enough, should use mouthwash, shouldn't use mouthwash... you name it! OK, fizzy drinks aren't great for your teeth but neither are a lot of things but guess what - they're your teeth and it's your life, so just do what you want!

What do you mean by 'I don't think I was supposed to be nervous'? Lots of people (including myself) get nervous at the dentist and a good dentist will know how to respond to that. I had to have an emergency filling done in my early 20s and I was so scared my dad drove 75 miles and back just to accompany me; fortunately the dentist was great. You shouldn't have been made to feel bad for being apprehensive.

Getting mouth X-rays done is pretty uncomfortable as well and extremely stressful if you have a strong gag reflex; again he should have been reassuring and helped you to feel calm rather than being impatient with you. It sounds as though he treated you like a naughty child rather than an anxious adult, which given you're now at university just isn't appropriate.

You had a bad experience with a bad dentist, but the amount of blame you're pinning onto yourself for this experience is really sad. You probably just need to find a better dentist, or take your current dentist's grouchiness with a pinch of salt!

 

[JAperson]

@Matt N, I think you're thinking about this all wrong and being far too down on yourself. Dentists will always tell you you're doing something wrong - I've been told I eat too much chocolate, drink too much tea, floss too vigorously, don't floss enough, should use mouthwash, shouldn't use mouthwash... you name it! OK, fizzy drinks aren't great for your teeth but neither are a lot of things but guess what - they're your teeth and it's your life, so just do what you want!

What do you mean by 'I don't think I was supposed to be nervous'? Lots of people (including myself) get nervous at the dentist and a good dentist will know how to respond to that. I had to have an emergency filling done in my early 20s and I was so scared my dad drove 75 miles and back just to accompany me; fortunately the dentist was great. You shouldn't have been made to feel bad for being apprehensive.

Getting mouth X-rays done is pretty uncomfortable as well and extremely stressful if you have a strong gag reflex; again he should have been reassuring and helped you to feel calm rather than being impatient with you. It sounds as though he treated you like a naughty child rather than an anxious adult, which given you're now at university just isn't appropriate.

You had a bad experience with a bad dentist, but the amount of blame you're pinning onto yourself for this experience is really sad. You probably just need to find a better dentist, or take your current dentist's grouchiness with a pinch of salt!

Could not have said it better myself, going the dentist isn't pleasant, most of the procedures include some bloke breathing down your neck putting his fingers in your gob, it isn't natural. Those mouth X-rays are bloody horrible and are one of the most uncomfortable things that they do now. Like I've always said, It's your life, you get one, if you want to have a fizzy drink then have one.

 

[Skyscraper]

@Matt NGetting mouth X-rays done is pretty uncomfortable as well and extremely stressful if you have a strong gag reflex; again he should have been reassuring and helped you to feel calm rather than being impatient with you. It sounds as though he treated you like a naughty child rather than an anxious adult, which given you're now at university just isn't appropriate.

This. Here in Sheffield we have a dental hospital which has an x-ray department, and their machines are used standing up, which is way more comfortable than doing it lay down on the dentist's chair in my local surgery. For that reason I always ask to have it at the hospital if I need one.

Also, does anyone else's neck hurt when lay down on the chair? I find it really uncomfortable. Then again I find Galactica uncomfortable, so maybe it's just me.

 

[QTXAdsy]

Don't know why, but for some reason I've just been feeling down today. Not sure if I'm just in a reflective mood but it has made me rather exhausted and dare I say rather helpless; I'm trying to avoid all news though sadly it just seems inevitable that I'll run into it one way or the other.

Been trying to do some house work and even rebuild a book shelve that was overdue for a fix but I still feel rather unfulfilled sadly. Don't know what I'm doing wrong.

 

[QTXAdsy]

Really sad day, me and my girlfriend have split. According to her, I did nothing wrong and I won't go into too much detail for privacy sake and how it is quite complicated other than five years together just sadly ended. She was to come to Alton Towers with me for July and now that is not going to happen and now I'm figuring out just what to do. Hasn't really sunk all in.

 

[Matt.GC]

Really sad day, me and my girlfriend have split. According to her, I did nothing wrong and I won't go into too much detail for privacy sake and how it is quite complicated other than five years together just sadly ended. She was to come to Alton Towers with me for July and now that is not going to happen and now I'm figuring out just what to do. Hasn't really sunk all in.

I'm sorry to hear that. 5 years is a long time.