• ℹ️ Heads up...

    This is a popular topic that is fast moving Guest - before posting, please ensure that you check out the first post in the topic for a quick reminder of guidelines, and importantly a summary of the known facts and information so far. Thanks.

The I Feel Down Topic.

I've just had enough. ??? I fancy my best friend, she's aware of this but got together with another guy a few weeks ago. Since we've hardly spent any time together just us two and i get the general impression from her that i mean nothing to her anymore. The only time i get to see her is when our whole friendship group is together, however most of those so called 'friends' dislike me and i find it hard to socialize with some of them because of this. I just want my best friend back, I've spoke to her about spending more time with me but it just turns into an argument because she want to be with everybody else and not just me. But she acts different around everyone else compared to when it's just us. We haven't done anything together for about 3 months so i don't think this new boyfriend has much to do with anything, although it kills me inside when i see them together being intimate and all the rest of it. I worry that she doesn't like me anymore and this anxiety just keeps building up; it has been for months and i just don't know what to do anymore. I know that i should try and distance myself from this friend, but i can't, she means too much me, even though i mean very little to her. ???
 
Ben. said:
My parents really do not like the whole rollercoaster thing, had a long dissuasion with my dad last night and he basically spewed a load of rubbish at me like “why can’t you have a normal hobby” and “when I was a kid I used to play football in my spare time, not rollercoaster’s”. Of course those aren’t his words, but that’s the basic interpretation of them.
Basically he mentioned that I’ve ordered my train tickets for scarefest and the room is booked, and he just kind of snapped, he calls me weird and strange regally, but that’s just having a laugh. But this time he said it very spitefully, just spat the words at me, saying things like he wished I was normal, why couldn’t he have had a normal son like Tom (next door neighbour’s kid, absolute sporting hero, straight A student, stereotypical perfect child), he also made some comments regarding ex of mine and reasoning of why she left, which was just 100% out of order. Sorry is this is all a bit of a cluttered post; to be honest it’s all a bit of a blur.
I just don’t want to even see him right now; I don’t get how the same man who drove me to the 10th birthday meet can turn around, and while unprovoked, say such horrible, spiteful things. He wants me to sign up to a boxing club, like he did when he was young (and if you have met me you will know how much of a laughable suggestion that is). And the odd thing is I really do feel as though I let him down, Get that horrible empty feeling like I have does something really wrong.
Click to expand...

poor you. really that is awful for you. you are you and if your parents don't respect this then they don't respect you. just because you prefer coasters to sports does not mean you are weird. it means you are interesting as opposed to a boring uninteresting sports addict. if it happens again just tell them that this is who you are and you won't change for anyone.

i have a friend like that. me and my best mate are both AT enthusiasts but my other friend says that we are sad losers but we really don't give a damn and tell her so. if she don't like it she can walk on by.
 
I was born in Stoke-On-Trent, when I was 5, my family and I moved to Portugal, I am now 13. I live away from my parents at the moment, both my parents still live in Portugal, but due to education reasons, I moved back here at the beggining of September to start school again (The same school I went to when I used to live here.)

I really need some help. I have never been so homesick, this change is so big for me. At the moment I live with a friend and they're really welcoming, but I have never been away from any of my parents for this long. Its been a month so far, I dont know how to cope with it until I visit home (Portugal) in Half-Term.

Does anyone have any tips on homesickness and some other things that may help me out?

Thanks!
 
PM me if you need Joelio, it might not be as bad as it seems.

Jon, being far away from your parents for the first time can be daunting and scary at times. it must be bad to feel homesick. I personally have never had that.

Are you using skype and other ways to communicate with them each day? Also do things that will make where you are staying feel like your home. Can just be little things like cooking a meal that you like or just some music that reminds you of home. Just try and do something that will bring your home here with you.

Also I would try talking to the friends that you are staying with. I am sure they might be able to help you.
 
Having one of those nights where I think I've made a complete mess of my life.

I've got a degree in an industry that wants people who can drive, to start with, and I can't. It's not that I haven't started learning or passed my test, I am legally not allowed to drive.

Ironically this is due to a visual impairment, and I did a filmmaking degree.

So, I'm taking some accounts qualifications in the hope this will get me a job. I'm only doing 2 days a week on the course, and have been trying to find some part time work. I'm getting nowhere.

I only graduated in July and I'm sick of being a graduate already. I either don't have the driving licence I need, or I'm over qualified for things like retail, or under experienced/qualified for accounts based stuff.

My real passion is photography, but again, a lot of people who offer work experience, or work alongside them, want you to be able to drive. So I've hit a dead end with trying to turn my passion into a career.

I want to move out, but I can't because I have no job. I love my parents dearly, but I'm getting this "itch" to stand on my own two feet, as it were.

My college lecturers were right, I should never have gone to uni to do that degree, I should've done something where being able to drive/see perfectly isn't so necessary :(
 
Not so much down as I am frustrated and stressed over my own skills.

Basically, I'm in the pre-production stage of making my own short film for my course in, you guessed it, Film Production. I was happily just starting my storyboard when I realised that my initial short film sypnosis would not work due to logistics, regardless of how well I write the shooting script or believability of the story itself, so went aaaall the way back to square 1! So I started fresh with a new and better, logistics wise, script but because what I'm doing is so physically and mentally taxing, I'm beginning to doubt how well I'll be able to pull this off and if I'll tribute the genres that I'm parodying properly. The worst thing about this is definitely the storyboard because it literally just takes forever to draw something even average that has merely a glimpse of what kind of shot or angle I want. I'm also fearing I'm slipping behind in class behind my peers, a few of them are already on the location plans, and that I'm not doing as well as I should be with the work I put across to my lecturer who interviewed me in the first place being a completely different standard to what I'm working at now.

I'm happy to be on the course and I wouldn't change it but I'm feeling so overwhelmed already that I may end up overtiring and stressing myself by setting a bar for my own highly optimistic standards for a distinction mark.

???
 
Generic home/school life and depression getting to me again. Life has no meaning and is utterly pointless.
 
Rowe, it does get easier, honest. I've just done a Film Production degree, so I know!

The trick, is to, hard as it is, not worry about ANYONE else, and what they're doing/how far they've got/how big their folder is, and just do your best. It's a total learning curve, and I only really started reaching the top of it in my final semester!

If you want a chat, PM me. Which uni are you at?
 
I'll agree with Vicki there, I did Film & Television Production at uni and I can only echo the advice given above, if you spend half your time worrying about what everyone else is doing compared to you you'll just make yourself feel rotten and take energy away from what you're actually doing.

That is especially the case when you're actually looking for professional work. Someone you know will always be doing better than you are, and stumbling accross that sort of thing on Facebook is one of the most depressing feelings. It's best to steer clear and focus on yourself.
 
I know where you're both coming from and I understand what you mean, it's just seeing people that have completed work (regardless of how simple the short film is) throws me off as when people are done before me, I instantly get those evil alarm bells telling me I'm slow or not working hard enough because I'm so used to that kind of learning.

I've spoken to my lecturer about my fears and he's offered to help me out with a number of things, especially as what I'm doing we're focusing on in two of his lessons later on but it's transpired that even my new story with the logistics won't work out.

I'm really happy you've both offered advice and suggestions, it's helped so thank you. Though now I could really do with calming down.

And Vicki, I'm at Warwickshire College, L3 Extended Diploma course.
 
Georgiaa, there is not much to be said. except if you want/need someone to talk to you know where my PM button is.
and i hope that black dog is not your companion for too long.
 
Hey, Georgia. I know life can be cruel and harsh but it's never pointless, ever. I respect your privacy, but feel free to chat via PM if you need to talk. Seeing peers upset is never nice so let me know if I can help. And Rowe, comparing yourself to others is always a recipe for disaster. Don't let pressure eat you up. :)
 
Everything is clearer, I have so much less to worry about, and I've still got a crazily busy and supportive life.

And I've never, ever felt worse. I have bursts of happiness (and god knows that being with you lot are the best times of my life) but I spend so much time just...utterly depressed. I loathe it.

I love life; I just wish this depression would go away.
 
Eurgh. I know the feeling you mean. When sadness eats you up yet you have no idea why and how to escape it. :(

I don't know much about you, but from posts, I see you are busy towards the end of your education. This seems to me like the cause of your depression. It's probably a bit of unrest and uncertainty at what's coming next that is consuming you and turning what should be a happy time into one where you can't help feeling down.

But you are obviously appreciative of your family and friends, and optimistic about life. Even if depression seems to make up 99% of your days, that 1% of happiness seems to show that your mentality is on the right track and will hopefully level out soon. :)
 
Well, I'd just like to say thank you to the council for completely changing the bus station round. Doesn't make things confusing AT ALL ::)

It was FINE as it was, why mess with it?
 
Well they have to blow our tax somewhere, don't they? New is ALWAYS better to these morons.
 
I had my iPod stolen last night. Proper one, 160gb. £180. This is money I don't have.

Why me? I have enough horrible crap to deal with at the moment, without this on top.

I hope whoever stole it gets hit by a car and I get my iPod back.
 
Think my nearly 1 year long relationship might be in trouble - can't say much as my username and real name are the same and you never know who's reading. But I think I'm heading for the first argument in the relationship :(
 
OK, so - in some other posts you may have noticed I've said I've been involved in Finance, Customer Service, Catering and what not - this is true! However, after the death of my best friend just shy of my 30th Birthday, taking with it the majority of my business/career, words he gave me have stuck with me ever since.

This was no ordinary guy, we were in Radio together, he was quite high profile certainly in our industry - had a passion, vigour, and talent that by now would have been gracing the biggest of airwaves (he had been nominated for a Sony Radio award too).

After this event, I found he had miraculously woven in a fabric of a belief system that allows me to continue on a path with a faith and determination, that should I begin to disbelieve, I actually make a mockery of our incredible friendship. After this point I began to research positive psychology and the like, even teaching it at points to colleges and businesses, and was involved in writing a book with some... well, rather impressive individuals, whom ALL gave the same advice. (The book isn't published yet, long story).

Anyway, the mind is a most powerful device! There are plenty of things you can do, to ease if you are feeling crappy. Meditation is a quality tool, vastly under rated! Don't see it as a mystical thing - it really isn't. Take time to reflect on the positive things you have. I've been through a really rough year myself, well over that now in fact - BUT - there is one thing I keep in mind above all else...

And to sum this up, as Sir Winston Churchill said....


"When you're going through hell, KEEP GOING!"

:)


Try as best you can, to maintain your focus on the POSITIVE aspects of your life. The brain takes in a fraction of millions of bits of information every day. Think of it like a Haystack of information, and your hand can ONLY grasp so many. THAT defines your experience of that moment in time. When you focus on a negative aspect, what about all that other straw that is sitting there, waiting to be explored? This is a metaphor used in NLP, to describe our mental ability to process information. We are FAR MORE in control of our experience than we realise. An approximation of such, is around 80/20 - 20% are experiences BEYOND our control. Things that will happen regardless, as they are not of our making. However, 80% CAN be attributed to our actions/reactions of a given experience!

The power of your life, really is in your own hands - grasp your own experience, stop worrying what others think of you. STOP comparing yourself to others (yes, you Rowe ;D) - the ONLY person you are in competition with is YOU. Everyone else will have their own insecurities and concerns just like you do. Who knows how THEY view YOUR work? Also, how many times at school did we experience the smart arse who boasted about their early hand in time, only to get a crappy grade :D

Stick to YOUR time scale. The creative process is one that requires your mind to be less logical. Remove the PRESSURE from your goal, and it flow more freely. I've been a musician all my life in various forms, you will be far better if you relax off yourself.

I bet you treat everyone else better than yourself!

Think of it this way - all the stuff you say to yourself in the mirror or in your head. Would you say that to anyone else (well, that you liked anyway hahah)? .....

Think about that for a moment...

So why do you say it to yourself?

BE kinder to yourselves, that way, you'll be kinder to those around you too :)

TheMan


OH and when I feel crappy, I stick this video on - WILL SMITH, very inspiring :)

[youtube]http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=q5nVqeVhgQE[/youtube]
 
You must log in or register to reply here.
Top