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The I Feel Down Topic.

Coastermaster said:
The motivation is greatly needed of late my photography is keeping me enthusiastic but im struggling to keep motivated at school with catch up I can get back to normal again well as normal as I am
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Yes well, what is "normal" lol! You wont find it on here, that's why we're all on here so you're in great company :D

I'll stop bombarding the thread now!
 
Well the normal freak I used to be who set up a little company called coastermaster incorporated
 
When you are with the doctor, you have to decide with them what is the best course of treatment for you.
May be it CBT only, may be it Meds and CBT or it could be meds only.
Never be fearfull of what the doctors going to do. It is the patient choice, your choice. If you say I want CBT and no Meds, then they have to take your choice.

My Choice is (yes i am going though it at the moment) Low level meds for stabilisation with CBT and PTS counselling. And it doing me well, As myself and my GP (he's great on MH matters) has spent time fine tuning my treatment.

I hope what you decide with your GPs Guidance suit your need and you get back to your usual self again soon.
 
I do last time I was severley ill he came from the other side of town from his surgery to the walk in centre just for me and went back my mum thought he was so sweet
 
Coastermaster said:
I do last time I was severley ill he came from the other side of town from his surgery to the walk in centre just for me and went back my mum thought he was so sweet
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Perhaps you could speak to him privately initially, then ask if he would be willing to explain things calmly to your mom with you present in another appointment afterwards? You are lucky to have a Dr of that ilk nowadays.
 
Yea that's what im going to do tomorrow im asking my best friend to come with me he is some times like a brother to me its great not all the people i went primary with have either turned into chavs or stuck up
 
Little things like my bun from McDonald's cheered me up today
Friends especially though
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I am stuck in a rut.

I have no time for myself any more. I'm so hell-bent on getting the job I want, and doing as much music work that I can that I take my holidays off to do shows. The result of this is that I haven't actually had time off for ages and I haven't really unwound for a good 3 years.

I've no idea what to do any more. I need a job that I can do along side my music work that enables me to give me time to myself, but I'm currently doing around 50 hours a week, and getting days off once every 2 weeks or so. But, I miss going to theme parks, I miss having all that to look forward to. I miss being able to spend time on myself, going on walks, practicing drums etc. But my lifestyle limits me with what little time I have, and because my job is so strenuous, I've no energy to do anything else when I do finally get a day off.

I'm shutting myself out to further my career, which I'm not even sure is working. I barely have any friends anymore, mainly due to drifting away because of my work ethic.

What can I do? I will be upset if I never get any music work. But I've no idea how I'll be able to afford to live if I don't work the amount I do... Genuinely, I'm baffled beyond belief. It almost feels like I've got no other choice.
 
The whole uni application process is getting me down. Feels like we are being told this is basically the one chance in life to be a success and if we don't get amazing grades or into a great uni thats it for us. When this sort of thing gets said it puts on so much pressure and makes it hard to value other things about yourself that make you happy and successful in life. I know you can resit, apply to uni at any age, change careers and that it's not as deterministic as being made out, but it's hard to keep that in mind when the aforementioned is constantly being reinforced. I'm 18 and I think it's my one chance to ever make anything of my life, or there's not much point which is really sad.

I want to be able to prioritise my health, possibly with the help of a gap year. I could focus on overcoming anxiety which I've been putting up with for years. I can't even catch a bus at the moment without having a panic attack which obviously is really restrictive. I want to try and focus on happiness and improving myself as a person so that I can approach my studies and future with a more positive outlook on life.
I want to be at the point where I can value the importance of education, but not out of proportion to happiness and health. I know rationally health and happiness comes first, but I still can't convince myself. :(
 
jenniferelka said:
I know rationally health and happiness comes first, but I still can't convince myself. :(
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Don't force it Jennifer, it makes it worse, this uni pressure will be naturally adding to the stress and anxiety you're feeling. Remember a good many of the world's most successful people made it themselves without degrees etc. I am not advocating that as a route, I didn't go and wish I had have done, I was certainly more than capable but... life.

The easiest spiral to put yourself in right now is forced pressure, the body feels a physical "pain" when forcing ourselves to do something we don't wish to do (I'm sure this is right, research if in doubt), but then is relieved once we actually complete said task. You aren't feeling anything that's not perfectly natural, accepting that without self judgement is a good way to ease a little of that anxiety you're experiencing right now.

Also, remember, pressure from others is false, it's only pressure when we allow that exertion to affect us and the reality is they most likely just want the best for you and the colleges results etc. Nothing wrong in that really.

Nothing here is really "wrong" per se and the pressure you're feeling is perfectly normal.

The first step to happiness, isn't forcing yourself to be happy, it's recognising that pressures like this and feeling the way you do right now are perfectly normal and accepting that as a normal part of being human.

To me, you already seem to be of the mindset that you value your education but not at the expense of your overall life, it's just that you're on the journey to learning how to achieve that balance.... throw anxiety into the spin and she can be a cruel mistress at times.

Try focusing on what it is you want to achieve, in a no pressure way, you're a very smart person, if you take the pressure off a little I'd bet a lot that you'd flourish.

All the best with it :)
 
I know this could sound a bit silly, but I really miss playing piano. Listening to my favourite pieces tonight has made me feel emotional about what happened this year. I feel like I am in a better place now than I was before, but when times were difficult at home, it was how I 'escaped' myself from whatever was happening. Learning my favourite pieces took lots of practise, and it made me feel proud when I was finally able to play them in a way that I could lose myself to the music. Since being told to move out I've not been able to do this anymore, and it's been difficult at times when I've really needed to take time away for myself when I've been most stressed. I don't know, listening to piano now just makes me really miss what I had, and causes me to think back to bad memories I had at home. I don't want to associate these memories with my favourite music, I'm just feeling emotional as I'm really worried I won't be able to play it again like I used to, it's not something I want to lose :(

Sorry if this sounds a bit stupid, it's just something that has been getting to me recently.
 
Kimberley said:
I know this could sound a bit silly, but I really miss playing piano. Listening to my favourite pieces tonight has made me feel emotional about what happened this year. I feel like I am in a better place now than I was before, but when times were difficult at home, it was how I 'escaped' myself from whatever was happening. Learning my favourite pieces took lots of practise, and it made me feel proud when I was finally able to play them in a way that I could lose myself to the music. Since being told to move out I've not been able to do this anymore, and it's been difficult at times when I've really needed to take time away for myself when I've been most stressed. I don't know, listening to piano now just makes me really miss what I had, and causes me to think back to bad memories I had at home. I don't want to associate these memories with my favourite music, I'm just feeling emotional as I'm really worried I won't be able to play it again like I used to, it's not something I want to lose :(

Sorry if this sounds a bit stupid, it's just something that has been getting to me recently.
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I've had the same since moving up here, see if you can find an alright electric one really cheaply to keep it up? You won't lose it though, it all comes back :)
 
GAGrathea said:
I've had the same since moving up here, see if you can find an alright electric one really cheaply to keep it up? You won't lose it though, it all comes back :)
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I agree @Kimberley in fact get yourself a cheap music program or free one (give me a shout I can advise if you want) and an electric keyboard. I have a couple of 5 octave ones, 1 I bought new for about 100 odd quid, the other second hand for about 40 with myriad controls that are mainly used to balance used toast plates :D. Both are older now, you can pick them up for next to nothing!

The M-Audio 61ES is a semi weighted full sized 5 octave beast and can probably be picked up for 40 quid now s/h!

Yes you need a computer program to use them, but as I say you can get them free and you can get free piano VST (virtual instrument) synthesizers. It wont match the freedom (or sound) of an actual piano, but for if you're not to fussy for next to nothing you can be tinkling the ivories in no time. Also, if you feel a bit emotive about piano, which is an evocative instrument (believe me I've gone through phases like you have, I think most musicians do, it's why we play in the first place), then you can load up a big dirty VST bass instrument and slam some keys down and make BIG NOISE instead!!

Give me a shout Kimberly if you want some advice, I'd be happy to help :)
 
Thank you both for your advice, I shall definitely have a look into it :) Only worry I had about getting an electric keyboard was the fact that my favourite pieces require use of the pedals, so I'm not sure how that would work, unless that is what the computer program would help with :p I've only ever used my electric piano at home, so this stuff is a bit alien to me! Feeling a bit better now compared to last night though, just had to get it off my chest - the piano is indeed a very evocative instrument, but I think that's why I love it so much :)
 
I am off work for a week with rib injuries. cant do anything including breathing without them hurting at one level or another. And after a visit to the doctors today, he want to test me for a condition that causes low serotonin levels.
 
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