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The I Feel Down Topic.

Have a little drink before hand, that should relax you.
don't do that, it's a joke.

Driving is pretty unnatural, all the time you are having to think about what you are physically doing with your hands and feet you won't be actually driving well, you need that attention for the road around you. When I've done specialist driving courses where the actual way you drive is deconstructed and rebuilt in a totally different way I've had the same thing. Suddenly I couldn't drive again!

It will only come with practice and that takes time, but once the actual act of driving is second nature the rest if it should fall into place. Just keep practicing as often as possible.
 
Do you have a family automatic?
A couple of hours on an empty supermarket car park did me wonders, just driving round the markings and learning to park.
Any extra experience really helps between lessons.
I remember my lessons being three quid an hour!
I was told two lessons for each year of life before things click...you have plenty of time.
 
Matt N said:
Then we went onto parking practice… where it took me 3 tries to get into a space.
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I’ve been driving for nearly 20yrs and sometimes still takes a couple of times to get into a space.

We all have bad days, don’t be so hard on yourself, dust yourself down and have another go next week, you will get there in the end.
 
I went through 3 instructors and a TON of driving lessons, its natural to feel some regression when learning because when you start to learn everything is new.

The important thing to remember is its not a race and your instructors job is to make you feel comfortable learning. I passed in 2014 and even now I still have days where my driving is **** and its taken me 5 attempts to park or ive gone a bit too close to someone else's car,

Your instructor will teach you how to pass your test. Then you really learn how to drive. Everyone learns in their own way too. Don't worry you'll get there
 
It took me about three times to pass the theory which was bad and then it took me about four or five times to pass thr driving. It can be a right slog but it is all worth it once you pass.

You'll get there I'm sure.
 
I've been driving for 15 years and sometimes I have bad days too! Coming back from a trip last Saturday I had to pull over and give the wheel to my husband because I was all over the place and just not focusing.

Sometimes brain says no. Don't read too much into it.
 
Thank you for the encouragement everybody. I thoroughly appreciate it.
rob666 said:
Do you have a family automatic?
A couple of hours on an empty supermarket car park did me wonders, just driving round the markings and learning to park.
Any extra experience really helps between lessons.
I remember my lessons being three quid an hour!
I was told two lessons for each year of life before things click...you have plenty of time.
Click to expand...
Sadly we don’t. Well, my mum’s car and my sister’s car (originally bought for me and her to share before it was decided that I would learn in an automatic) are both manual, anyway.

My dad drives an automatic, but his car is also a massive £30,000 Volvo, so I’m not sure he’d let me drive it, and even if he did, I’m not sure I could trust myself not to damage it… and it would also be a vastly different car to drive to my instructor’s car (my instructor drives a Nissan Note, which is much smaller), which is what I will ultimately do my test in.

Your lessons cost £3 an hour? Wow… mine cost £35 an hour! The wonder of inflation, eh?
 
Sounds like you and dad on the supermarket car park at eight on Sunday mornings then Matt.
You can tell him I said so!
Would do you wonders, and driving in a different car would do you good as well.
 
Make sure the instructor is the right one for you too.

My first one yelled at me because I did something wrong when parallel parking so I cancelled all lessons with him and went with someone else. The right instructor will make you feel at ease, understand you'll make mistakes and help you to avoid them in the future
 
Tibble said:
Make sure the instructor is the right one for you too.

My first one yelled at me because I did something wrong when parallel parking so I cancelled all lessons with him and went with someone else. The right instructor will make you feel at ease, understand you'll make mistakes and help you to avoid them in the future
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I've had terrible instructors too. The first one was just useless, just sat there in silence and gave me no feedback. He eventually quit to work in Carphone Warehouse...

The third one I had was a total a-hole. I'd moved cities and had never done a sliproad before and told him I was worried about it. He gave me no guidance at all and once I'd got myself onto the dual carriageway sweating and shaking told me "it looked like I didn't know what I was doing". He also refused my request to practice the big roundabout near the test centre on the morning of my test and had me doing parallel parks instead. Guess what I failed on!

Honestly I think the best instructor I ever had was my dad. His rates were very competitive as well ☺️
 
I think I learned most when just driving around on L plates with my dad in the passenger seat. That extra learning time between formal lessons with an instructor helps a lot. Maybe consider passing in a manual gearbox car and get that extra experience between lessons in a manual car? Just thinking out loud.
 
Right, I hate to be in this situation again of how I'm feeling but I have to vent out my fears and feelings on the matter. Actually it is more of a feeling of depression and anger which the latter I've been feeling more and more I'm scared to admit.

Yeah, I won't beat about the bush but it is regarding the whole cost of living crises and all that which you will say isn't really a surprise which I suppose millions more are scared and angry, though I do have my own feelings on the matter which is more about the media that anything government does.

I have tried to avoid much of it as possible as news coverage is getting worse and worse by the day and that previous comment I made sometime ago about media sensationalism has only furthered this anger and depression that had brewing within me for the last few months. What gets to me whenever I happen to have the terrible luck of seeing something about the whole thing on the news or on radio you always get these guys who I honestly don't know who they other than they aren't in government or are just some smugged face 'comedian' who always just so happens to have a face a fist would be good friends with them saying that not enough is being done and all that and yet whenever I hear this I'm like 'if you think you can do better then bloody well do it yourselves!'

Look, I'm not taking any sides in political mudslinging - I just want a solution that can be solved yet I'm heartbroken at just seeing how there is no unity on both sides of the political divide and this goes back from covid in which even a common threat did little to unite them. If that didn't work then that won't help here either and regards to the media...Oh God help me, I can't escape from hearing about it at least once.

I'm not saying I'm in denial about the whole situation, I'm only asking to try and not think about it at least once though sadly that is not possible as whenever I check on some hobby I'm interested online either regards to railways, some franchise or even here on TS, there is always something about cost of living and economic crisis that is always brought into a conversation to the point there is no way to avoid it.

I've seen it here on TS not on the political forums and I won't name name's because honestly they won't know any better how I'm feeling and who am I to halt free speech? Speaking of which, you'll notice I'm never on any discussion regarding current political events and such because frankly I've been exposed to such vile and total narcissism over the past few years, media included, that I've had it up to here and even of debates on here are healthy, I'm sorry, I can't touch anything political with a barge pole now which is sad as some years ago I was interested in listening in on that stuff but now it is so horrible that I avoid it like a plauge and yet I just can't seem to avoid it all. Politics up here does that to a man.

It really has been a bad year for me personally, you'll know of my split from my GF a couple of months ago and I haven't spoken to her in all that time (never felt right to go back to someone after a break up, even for help as the memories are too painful) and now I'm hearing all those horrible things that are happening and yet thanks to how media has become more OTT in reporting things and how even truthful they are, I feel like I can't trust anyone even if all this horrible stories about rise of costs and stuff is true, the previous baggage surrounding them has made me turn my back on them.

My parents try to sugarcoat things whenever I even bring up something that is troubling me yet I never feel they are that entirely helpful, my ex had a good way of helping me rationalise things that were troubling me and was truly a great support for me...now I don't have that and I honestly have no clue who to turn to other than suffer in isolation over everything, lord how I miss her for advice and comfort and I'll never get that again.

Yeah, I'm exposing myself out here to many of you in which while technically don't know any of you in the flesh, there is no other place I can let this all out and probably better to write it out than keep it in I suppose, I'd still prefare someone in person to speak in privatly about how I feel yet i don't know who to. What's sad is that next month I hit 30, I have said once you hit there your life goes downhill from then on and given the terrible misfortune of what's happened in my personal life and what is looming over the horizon, what I said about that is frightenly becoming more truer as each day passes. What is more scary for me that with how the media keeps saying death awaits us with no light at the end of the tunnel, what's the point? Honestly right now I'd have 2020 back in a heartbeat which tells you how bad I'm feeling right now.

I hate to say this, but the drink is looking more tempting and I'd be lying if something involving the 's' word has crossed my mind at least once...no I'm not going to do it but all the same, with how bad things are, the sad thing is right now as we speak, some youngsters who feel that they have no future from those crises will do just that right now as we speak and those running these stories are creating a mental horror show for all to see.

I'm sorry, I've said to much about me personally but I feel that I had no other way to say this and I know there are younger folk here on TS who need some older pillar of strength to look up to, Lord knows we really need some comfort and support in these times that is not cynical, and I'm sorry I can't be that no matter how I might act, I've been keeping this bottled up for so long and yet I'm scared what it might all do to me.

Bottom line, 2022 has been despite some little bursts of happiness a really horrible year for me mentally and for now, I can only keep up a calm figure in public and hope I can fight this though it is exhausting. I don't know what I'm going to do right now.
 
Sometimes just talking (or typing) and letting stuff out can help, and sometimes doing that with strangers can be easier than people you know, so don’t worry about off loading how you are feeling on here.

In terms of a couple of points:

QTXAdsy said:
What's sad is that next month I hit 30, I have said once you hit there your life goes downhill from then on and given the terrible misfortune of what's happened in my personal life and what is looming over the horizon, what I said about that is frightenly becoming more truer as each day passes.
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I wouldn’t get hung up too much on this. 30 is nothing, you might start to feel older round these parts due to the youngsters(!) - but there is so much positive stuff that comes with age - just knowing yourself is a big one, it certainly isn’t something I understood until I was in my 30’s.
QTXAdsy said:
I hate to say this, but the drink is looking more tempting and I'd be lying if something involving the 's' word has crossed my mind at least once...no I'm not going to do it but all the same, with how bad things are, the sad thing is right now as we speak
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Sorry you are feeling like this. Just know that you can always speak to someone at Samaritans for free by calling 116123. They are great and will just listen and not judge. Hopefully you will never need them, but it’s always good to know there is someone to talk to. :)
 
Nearing 2 years since my Grandad went into hospital and didn't come out

Have been feeling **** since I lost my job back in July in **** circumstances. Trying to get myself back to somewhat functional but it's difficult. Had a complete breakdown in the Gardens at Towers a couple of weeks ago. Definitely think there's a great depression at the moment.

I'm very lucky to have such a great friendship group both from this community and at home, but I'm struggling big time. It's a scary time and trying to keep myself occupied but it's really difficult to keep myself going when all I want is to just give up at times, I've been scarily close this year.
 
QTXAdsy said:
Right...
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I think theres probably too much going on in your life for anything written here to make a meaningful difference, you clearly need some proper professional support, so please fo and ask for some. It is out there, but you need to find it, it won't come and find you.

I know it's not as easy as just deciding to do it, but I think your outlook might improve if you stop being brought down by things you really can't influence, accepting that war around the world and the unknowable future of our economy are not your weight to carry. Concentrate your thoughts and efforts into things you have control of.
 
MattyH said:
Nearing 2 years since my Grandad went into hospital and didn't come out

Have been feeling **** since I lost my job back in July in **** circumstances. Trying to get myself back to somewhat functional but it's difficult. Had a complete breakdown in the Gardens at Towers a couple of weeks ago. Definitely think there's a great depression at the moment.

I'm very lucky to have such a great friendship group both from this community and at home, but I'm struggling big time. It's a scary time and trying to keep myself occupied but it's really difficult to keep myself going when all I want is to just give up at times, I've been scarily close this year.
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You have me...I'm mentally a weary wreck who needs comfort and support. I know I have my own problems and fears of the world that I've already mentioned, but I'm there to talk to privately in which I guess we can try and help each other out.
 
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