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The I Feel Down Topic.

Not sure how to quote tweet all of the replies to my initial message. Just want to thank you for your advice and support which has been a great help.

Now 9 days sober and I can’t believe how much better I feel. It’s been tough but I’m sticking to it because I like how happy and fresh I feel. 9 days isn’t a lot to most but feels like a win for me.
9 days is a lot. 9 days soon turns into 10, which turns into 11, which turns into 12, which turns into a lifetime. Well done. Today is the day that counts. Do be proud of yourself, you're doing brilliantly!

You may relapse, you may deicide that you can return to a safe relationship with alcohol. If it happens, don't let that get you down. One drink does not undo all of the hard work you've done, it's the second drink that does.
 
Not sure how to quote tweet all of the replies to my initial message. Just want to thank you for your advice and support which has been a great help.

Now 9 days sober and I can’t believe how much better I feel. It’s been tough but I’m sticking to it because I like how happy and fresh I feel. 9 days isn’t a lot to most but feels like a win for me.
Very proud of you
 
Not sure how to quote tweet all of the replies to my initial message. Just want to thank you for your advice and support which has been a great help.

Now 9 days sober and I can’t believe how much better I feel. It’s been tough but I’m sticking to it because I like how happy and fresh I feel. 9 days isn’t a lot to most but feels like a win for me.
I came across this newsletter / substance whilst listening to a podcast today. It's called "The Small Bow" and it tells tales of those who are on the path to getting sober. I've taken a curious glance and I think it's definitely worth a read, or even a free subscription.


The episode it was mentioned on is "When do you know it's time to stop drinking?", the show is Search Engine. Also worth a listen to and very relatable.
 
I failed my first driving test, with 1 major and 9 minors.

I’m not too gutted, as realistically, I knew my chances of passing first time weren’t amazing given my history and the fact that only 50% of people pass first time anyway, but it does sting a little that I still couldn’t quite get over the line to pass after 20 months of driving lessons…
 
I failed my first driving test, with 1 major and 9 minors.

I’m not too gutted, as realistically, I knew my chances of passing first time weren’t amazing given my history and the fact that only 50% of people pass first time anyway, but it does sting a little that I still couldn’t quite get over the line to pass after 20 months of driving lessons…
If it's any consolation, Matt, I also failed my first driving test (two majors, and seven minors). Screwed up a parallel park right at the end, which is even more frustrating, as it was clearly going well up to that point! It also didn't help that the examiner I had told me I'd failed in a rather blunt and tactless way.

Best advice I have is to treat it as a learning experience, and use it as a chance to work out where you need to improve.
 
I failed my first driving test, with 1 major and 9 minors.

I’m not too gutted, as realistically, I knew my chances of passing first time weren’t amazing given my history and the fact that only 50% of people pass first time anyway, but it does sting a little that I still couldn’t quite get over the line to pass after 20 months of driving lessons…
Just keep going. when I was learning took me a while to actually get as far as taking my test due to finances and will - so the fact that you are ready is great. And remember, you didn't fail, you just haven't passed yet
 
Sorry to hear that @Matt N - it's natural to be disappointed. However it's really not unusual to not pass the first time - and personally I think it makes you a better driver when you do. (I should know, I failed three, and I'm an excellent driver ;)).

Ahead of my fourth test I found it helpful to download some practice test routes and do 'simulated' tests with my dad (who by then had pretty much taken over as my permanent instructor!). I'd definitely recommend it as a way of exposing yourself to test conditions and becoming comfortable with the format. If you're super-lucky you might even get a similar route in your test as one you have previously practiced.

Also, I don't think you ever told us the outcome, but if you haven't yet replaced the instructor that was making you so uncomfortable, now might be a good time to do so. (You can even just tell them you are 'taking a break from it to save money' or something and they will be none the wiser!)
 
I failed my first driving test, with 1 major and 9 minors.

I’m not too gutted, as realistically, I knew my chances of passing first time weren’t amazing given my history and the fact that only 50% of people pass first time anyway, but it does sting a little that I still couldn’t quite get over the line to pass after 20 months of driving lessons…

It's a bummer mate, so sorry that this has happened! The test can be incredibly challenging and I know it's probably put a spanner in the works for any plans you might have, but this certainly isn't the end of the line. Best advice I can give now - keep driving as often as you can, with your parents, friends of age, instructor - it'll help rebuild your confidence.

I'm sure you know how tricky getting a test can be - depending on how ready you feel, I'd look into any last minute cancellations in your area and surrounding towns. It may be a bit off-putting - the potential to take such an important drive in an unfamiliar place - but it's something worth considering. My second test was a cancellation for about three, maybe four days away, in a town that I'd only driven through once prior (after getting the booking I did some practise there as well). It's also worth remembering that there are so many routes the examiner may take you down; I was particularly anxious about two unfamiliar roundabouts there, and was ready for them to appear on the test, only to be taken down a more cross-country route! There's a number of paid apps you can use that can scout out cancellations, so again, take a look if that's what you're going for.

I'd perhaps also suggest checking out this channel on Youtube - again, this helped me with any questions I had about lane changes, roundabouts, how to deal with test nerves etc.

If it's any consolation - I failed my first test last Spring, as my driving instructor didn't teach me the emergency stop - how sharp to brake, what distance you need to stop in, when to check your mirrors, when to press the hazard button. I was told this manouvre wasn't on the test, which turned out to be a total lie. This isn't the end of the road at all; I'm sure you'll pass in good time.
 
Not the best of news. However look at the major and the minors, see if they are in the same area. E.g observation.
Use the point as a base on which to look at what you need more training and practice on.

Sent from my SM-A705FN using Tapatalk
 
Sorry to hear that @Matt N - it's natural to be disappointed. However it's really not unusual to not pass the first time - and personally I think it makes you a better driver when you do. (I should know, I failed three, and I'm an excellent driver ;)).

Ahead of my fourth test I found it helpful to download some practice test routes and do 'simulated' tests with my dad (who by then had pretty much taken over as my permanent instructor!). I'd definitely recommend it as a way of exposing yourself to test conditions and becoming comfortable with the format. If you're super-lucky you might even get a similar route in your test as one you have previously practiced.

Also, I don't think you ever told us the outcome, but if you haven't yet replaced the instructor that was making you so uncomfortable, now might be a good time to do so. (You can even just tell them you are 'taking a break from it to save money' or something and they will be none the wiser!)
My dad said something similar to me. He’s always said to me that he only knew two people who’d passed first time, and they were both “absolutely dreadful” drivers…

Unfortunately, they don’t put the test routes online anymore. They’re completely secret to anyone other than the examiners, so I can only go off of my driving instructor’s best educated guess of what the routes are (which was pretty accurate today, to be fair, as pretty much every road I travelled down was one I’d encountered before).

I never did replace my driving instructor in the end, and I don’t intend to at this point in time. Things were really good between us in the weeks and months leading up to the test, and in hindsight, part of me wonders whether I was exaggerating a little at the time and making things seem worse in my head than they actually were. She couldn’t have been nicer and more encouraging about the result today, and things went very nicely for the last few months before the test. Besides, even if I did want to replace her, the alternative options in terms of automatic driving instructors in the Forest of Dean are very limited…
It's a bummer mate, so sorry that this has happened! The test can be incredibly challenging and I know it's probably put a spanner in the works for any plans you might have, but this certainly isn't the end of the line. Best advice I can give now - keep driving as often as you can, with your parents, friends of age, instructor - it'll help rebuild your confidence.

I'm sure you know how tricky getting a test can be - depending on how ready you feel, I'd look into any last minute cancellations in your area and surrounding towns. It may be a bit off-putting - the potential to take such an important drive in an unfamiliar place - but it's something worth considering. My second test was a cancellation for about three, maybe four days away, in a town that I'd only driven through once prior (after getting the booking I did some practise there as well). It's also worth remembering that there are so many routes the examiner may take you down; I was particularly anxious about two unfamiliar roundabouts there, and was ready for them to appear on the test, only to be taken down a more cross-country route! There's a number of paid apps you can use that can scout out cancellations, so again, take a look if that's what you're going for.
Thankfully, I didn’t really make any plans assuming I’d pass, so there’s nothing I’d planned that really had a spanner thrown in the works by this.

Frequent driving might be difficult. My parents have always said a very blunt “no” to taking me out to practice, as when they took my sister out to practice, it was apparently very counterintuitive for both parties, but I’ll try to keep up weekly lessons with my instructor.

I hadn’t thought about doing it in other towns, but having had a look today, the town I did it in is actually the one where I can get a test soonest, so I may not need to anyway. I’ve booked one in the current town for 9th July, but I may look to move this to an earlier date if I can find a cancellation.
Not the best of news. However look at the major and the minors, see if they are in the same area. E.g observation.
Use the point as a base on which to look at what you need more training and practice on.

Sent from my SM-A705FN using Tapatalk
The major was in the last 5 minutes of the test, where I was supposed to take a slip road off a 40mph single-carriageway road into the road I was turning into, but I instead turned into it like a regular junction and didn’t use the slip road. I thought that the slip road led into a different road, and I was caught off guard as I wasn’t necessarily expecting a slip road on a single-carriageway road.

I did have 4 minors for mirror checking ahead of signalling, so that may be an area to improve. I do check my mirrors, but I don’t think my head movements are quite as pronounced as they need to be for a driving test.
 
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Trying to work out what you did wrong to actually cause a major? Seems a bit dodgy.
Basically, I was driving along a single-carriageway road with a 40mph speed limit, and it went something like this:
  • I was driving along and the examiner told me to turn into a road on the left.
  • I checked my mirrors and signalled up, as you would to turn left.
  • I went right up to the turning and turned 90 degrees to the left into the road, as you would expect to do on a traditional junction.
  • However, this junction had a slip road on it. I had thought that the slip road was for a different road going elsewhere, and as the road was a single carriageway road, I wouldn’t traditionally have expected a slip road. But as there was a slip road there, I was expected to use it.
The examiner said that because I did not use the slip road when one was there, it was an instant fail due to “improper use of the slip road”. It was marked on my failure confirmation email as “incorrect road positioning for turning left on a junction”.
 
Unlucky Matt, but as others have pointed out it's a rarity to manage to pass first time - I got a major and a fair few minors on my first shot, passed again 6 weeks later (thanks to my 2nd test 4 weeks later being cancelled for ice). You'll get there, and on the whole it's a pretty good result considering the pressure of being under test conditions. Very easy to let something slip your mind when you're trying to concentrate on everything else.

Considering the majority of the minors are due to mirrors, they're easily fixable. The major/serious being due to not noticing the slip road - it's safe to say you won't make that mistake again and you'll be well aware of it in future. I'd say you're in pretty good shape to go again on your second shot :).
 
When I passed my test at the second attempt, I ended up with the same number of minors as I did in my first attempt, but they were in completely different areas. Thought this was strangely amusing, but I didn't really worry all that much. I'd finally passed my driving test. :p
 
I failed my first driving test, with 1 major and 9 minors.

I’m not too gutted, as realistically, I knew my chances of passing first time weren’t amazing given my history and the fact that only 50% of people pass first time anyway, but it does sting a little that I still couldn’t quite get over the line to pass after 20 months of driving lessons…

Matt. Get a new driving instructor NOW. 20 months and a fail is ringing all the alarm bells
 
Matt. Get a new driving instructor NOW. 20 months and a fail is ringing all the alarm bells
I don’t think I can put my failure down to my instructor.

Yes, I have taken a long time to learn, but a driving test has a huge amount of variables in it that could cause someone to fail no matter how long they’ve been learning for.

There is a huge amount of luck and chance involved in a driving test no matter how skilled you are, and my reason for failing was simply that I was flustered and made a very silly mistake. That was my fault, and mine alone. I also had some minors, but again, those were entirely my fault and could easily be put down to me being nervous on my first test and encountering things I wasn’t expecting.

For instance, my one minor for “Progress - appropriate speed” was because I nearly overtook a learner, but held back because they suddenly sped up and I wasn’t sure if I had enough space to overtake safely. My speed then dropped to an overly low level, as I was trying to stay behind this learner. I did eventually overtake, and I corrected this error quickly enough for it to only be a minor, but the examiner said that this very nearly became a 2nd major. I should really have known that it was OK to overtake the learner, but when I was nervous and in the moment, I was feeling hesitant.
 
Old man drivers note...
Learner drivers often speed up to the speed limit when you (carefully) come up behind them, as that is when they realise they aren't going fast enough.
It is just like plate spinning Matt, keeping a check of all those different things at once.
Good luck with the second test...I think things were a lot easier in the olden days!
 
Feeling furious counts as feeling down, right?

Because I'm sure feeling that way towards Warner Bros executives and CEO David Zaslav for their terrible decision to tax write off the completed Coyote vs. Acme film at the end of this month.

I haven't been this distraught since I learnt Disney canned Henry Selick's The Shadow King, which was in pre-production, but at least Selick has reacquired the rights.
 
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