The I Feel Down Topic.

[Pixie-Ro]

Believe it or not, people can also endure hell at private school. There are bullies, bitches and bigots everywhere unfortunately. The grass is always greener.

I'll happily swap then - where do I sign up? I presume you're happy going to a crap inner-city comp? The original point of my post was about how annoying it is for the majority of us to see someone handed the world on a plate and then to moan about it before they've even experienced it.

But what you want is not necessarily what other people want. And the world is what you make of it - I know plenty of very successful people who went to 'crap inner-city comps', but they had drive and ambition to succeed. My sister had a scholarship to a private school, I went to a comp. We both finished uni with the same level degree and we are both professional people. Only difference being that I ended up able to cope better socially and cope better in the real world, which eventually we all have to blunder our way through.

And I did chuckle at your last post as it has been many, many years since I attended my crap inner-city comp!

Btw, I am not trying to stifle your opinion, or suggest you shouldn't express it, I enjoy a good debate, but I simply don't think this thread is the place for it. One lesson I have learnt is sometimes in life you just have to bite your tongue and keep your thoughts to yourself, however much you believe in them.

 

[delta79]

Sam have you ever had a change that everyone thinks is great but you had worries/Anxiety about. Change in life worries people, the fear of the unknown etc.

Anxiety, worries, feeling down is fluid thing that is based on the person own experiences. its is unique to the person.

Alex is showing his Anxiety and a little bit of stereotyping in his post. All power to him for getting a scholarship.

He is young (compared to me) and from past posting seems to have had some challenges in life. But he is still developing coping mechanisms, and moving from public to private scholarship aided schooling, is a big thing for him.

Troubles on here many not see much compared to your own. Being on Venlafaxine shows you are having major problems yourself. (and i wish you luck with them)

I think that all that is asked in this thread is we trying to understand and support the problem of other posters.

 

[Harv]

Not taking sides, but I will just say that private school poses an entirely different, albeit perhaps more trivial, set of problems than a state school. I shan't pretend that I've got much experience in real "problem schools" but I live on an estate, spent my primary years in a comp and work every weekend without complaint to secure my place at school.

Discrimination is everywhere, and unless you're filthy rich, it's unlikely that acceptance will come as easily in a private school. Scholarships are often seen as a "free handout" when in actual fact, I work damn hard to keep my place. Good grades are expected unconditionally and I am under constant pressure and scrutiny by both teachers and family alike. My family has sacrificed holidays for 6 years and scrimped every spare penny to send me into private education, and when I'm older, I hope I'll be able to repay them for this massive expenditure. I am appreciative of their efforts and consequently see myself as much more of a realist than my peers, who generally determine somebody's value by what car they drive or how many charms they have on their Pandora bracelet.

I'm not judging anybody, saying anybody is right or wrong or even entering into a debate here, but it's worth saying that scholarships aren't all "lucky child gets chosen and spends 6 years gallivanting around with posh friends, riding ponies, pulling stunts on the matron and sneaking into the astronomy tower". Please try to keep an open mind; change is hard and the private school environment is one commonly misconceived. I'm not saying that it's hell on Earth like many imply, because it's not a patch on some schools, and I've enjoyed my time there, on the whole. Just don't let stereotypes confuse you, as has been said before, "the grass is always greener".

 

[alee298]

Hmm...I thought this was a thread where people could vent about what is getting them down without judgement, discrimination or ridicule. What may seem petty to you can be a big issue for somebody else. Everybody on here is different, bear in mind age, background, position and other things we have absolutely no idea about - never judge a man until you have walked in a mile in his shoes. People come to this thread for support, as I see it either give it to them or keep your opinions to yourself. This thread is not a place for sarcasm.

But it's ridiculous, how can you get down about what people who you've never met are going to be like?! To moan about how terrible it is for someone else to pay for you to go through private school is really insulting to someone like me, and I suspect many others around here, who would have loved to have had a private education rather than have had six years of hell at a crap inner-city comp.

alee, just take comfort that even if they are "snot nosed, pompous gits", at least nobody will be bringing knives to school, nobody will get beaten to a pulp for daring to be gay or black and nobody is going to deliberately burn the school down and end up in prison.

Sam, only problem is, people do get beaten up for being gay and discriminated. But they get dealt with. Unlike my last school where the teachers were good at teaching, but couldn't deal with problems like that. The amount of times people called me "nigger" Was ridiculous. Plus they are looking down on me as I am as I explained, a piece of turd to be ignored as my dad isn't the manager of some big expensive company ect. I went for an induction day. They all spoke like they had a plum in their mouth, meanwhile I am looking like an idiot and they turn their noses up at me like im a rat. it just makes me feel worse than I am... see some of my earlier post to do with some proper stuff that is depressing... this is more of an aggravating thing. Or to put it simply. I want my old friends back and I prefer state school. Its more friendly. Sam, wanna swap?

 

[alee298]

Believe it or not, people can also endure hell at private school. There are bullies, bitches and bigots everywhere unfortunately. The grass is always greener.

I'll happily swap then - where do I sign up? I presume you're happy going to a crap inner-city comp? The original point of my post was about how annoying it is for the majority of us to see someone handed the world on a plate and then to moan about it before they've even experienced it.

Sorry for double post again, but at induction day. I was left wandering around by my self. So basically I am going to spend 3 years with no friends, if I get good enough grades to stay on 6 years with no friends to have fun with. I have experienced the inner city state schools, I could make friends there as we were all in the same boat with our parent with no money and the like... Well I will have to prove the rich buggers how to like poor paupers like me and that we are not all tramps that have only a rat infested flat to live in. Despite my dads lack of support and many other things guess I will have to lump it and bloody well use this opportunity and get good grades and fly as high as I can. And went to the doctors today and they said I have some knee condition that means my knee will grind and wear out faster, and I will have to do some exercises and keep them supple.

 

[Joseph]

Hi. I cannot really describe my feelings right now but im feeling sort of lonely on this site, I feel sort of stricken away and that people don't like me much, and if thats the case im sorry. I do want to tell you guys somthing though . I recently did my grade one musical theater exam, and got a 98 out of 100 mark, which is classed as a distinction. Next year is the start of my GCSE (Year 10) and im pretty nervous so if anyone would like to be a friend please say.v :/

 

[delta79]

Blooming nora Joseph. 98 that's take some doing, well done.

 

[WillG]

The meet last weekend, as much as I enjoyed it, made me feel old.
Today, however, I made the mistake of attending my childhood best friend's 25th birthday party. This featured his friends from university discussing mortgages, weddings, engagements and other 'grown up' things that I'm still a lifetime away from concerning myself with. This made me feel old too, but in an entirely different way.

I also made the mistake of speaking to someone without a sense of humour, which, because of the way I am, ended in an argument, but I think the damage was already done.

Thanks to my own stupidity and stubborness, I'm single as I have been for much of my life (4 years ago, I skipped the same friend's 21st to go on my first date with a girl that I've given up hope of ever getting over), which gets me down more than I like to admit. Thanks to my own laziness and total lack of people skills, I'm not in the greatest job in the world, but it gets me where I need to go, and for the first time in a long time, I work bloody hard in the week to try to improve the situation. Really, I should be very glad for still living at home with my family who I get on well with, for the most part, and who perhaps do TOO good a job of looking after me, but the conversations about house prices, suburbs and afternoon f**king tea I was stuck in the middle of this evening left me wondering where exactly I've been going wrong...

I shouldn't be allowed out really, it never ends well for anyone.

 

[JamesDLD]

I don't usually post in these sort of topics, but I honestly don't feel I have anywhere to say this stuff any more.

I'm extremely down, and have been for weeks now. What started as feeling sad but hopeful has now morphed into something which feels dark and despairing.

I try hard to stay with it, but time and time again resort to self medication, which only makes the problem worse. I have horrendous issues with food and self image (can't believe I'm announcing this for the whole world to see), and I also suffer from OCD. I feel like a freak TBH.

I'm not looking for sympathy or help, but to know that there is a place where you can get this off your chest is a huge help.

 

[Panda]

Dreading going back to school so much. Depression, anxiety, voices, detentions, moved down into lower sets and I'm going to fail all my GCSEs.
My medication is making me so unbelievably tired that daily activities like dog walking or drawing are a chore. I unintentionally treat people like dirt and just don't feel like talking. These are some pretty naff 'antidepressants' as I've never felt so low in my life, I'm still wanting to harm myself so badly.
I need to get out of here, this bubble just won't burst and I'm running out of time.

 

[alee298]

^ just saying, you will be able to pass your GCSE's. Just say it and your chances will improve. Plus you will boss it for art! You can do it. We all know you can.

 

[alee298]

Going paintballing good, but with my screwed knees and ankle, I am going to die. And I have to choose my GCSE subjects :I I will do geography, but I dunno what else...

 

[Andrew]

Going paintballing good, but with my screwed knees and ankle, I am going to die. And I have to choose my GCSE subjects :I I will do geography, but I dunno what else...

As long as you lie low at Paintballing, you'll be fine.

As for GCSE subjects, choose a subject which is interesting and you find enjoyable. Never choose a subject just because someone you know chose it. Think about what you want to do when you're older when choosing as it helps. Also, ask students about what the subjects are like as they have experience and will tell you truthfully how the subject is.

 

[delta79]

there is two way to be good at paintball, be fast or be smart.

best thing to do is find a good defensible spot, bed down in it to lower your affective target-able area, blend in. and aim for the largest part of the attacker to increase the chance of getting a hit on them.

 

[Ted]

Dreading going back to school so much. Depression, anxiety, voices, detentions, moved down into lower sets and I'm going to fail all my GCSEs.
My medication is making me so unbelievably tired that daily activities like dog walking or drawing are a chore. I unintentionally treat people like dirt and just don't feel like talking. These are some pretty naff 'antidepressants' as I've never felt so low in my life, I'm still wanting to harm myself so badly.
I need to get out of here, this bubble just won't burst and I'm running out of time.

Since you passed your maths last year, is it not possible for you to drop it? (We were allowed to do this in my Secondary School) It'll definitely put less pressure on you for the year. All I can say for now is good luck in all your others.

Your "Unintentionally treating people like dirt" is just showing that you're extremely frustrated in your life. I don't know whether it's to people on TST or outside of this website. But if it's the former, almost (If not that) Everyone on here understands your situation and knows you don't really mean to treat us like dirt.

And I remember you saying to me a while ago it was about 2 months since you hadn't harm yourself? That is a massive achievement for you and you've done very well considering the awful scenario you've been in. And that was what, a couple of weeks ago? (That you told me). The longer you go without it the better the achievement will be.

 

[alee298]

I don't know why... But since about MArch I have started to feel more anxious when there is more than 4 or 5 people in a room with me, especially people I don't know that well. Or on Xbox in party chat, if there is more than about 3 people I get scared... :I I also hate crowds too, in a shopping centre I have to be right next to my best mate or I get really scared.

 

[QTXAdsy]

Felt really bad yesterday, had a faint in the bathroom. Only have gotten round to say this due to me staying in bed most of the day. After a trip to the doctor, turns out I have a little lack of sugar and will carry out a blood test on Friday just to be sure, though hopefully this was just a crazy one of.

 

[alee298]

BAck to school today, all the people were posh gits, going on about their holidays to far flung exotic places, While I just said I went to thorpe park. :I and also banging on about how they have all the latest tech. Some were friendly. Most just ignored me. But I felt out of place, and the grounds were huge and there were too many people. I had to go to the toilets and freak out... The sixth formers scared me too.

 

[Poisson]

The sixth formers scared me too.

How did they scare you? Sixth Formers don't bite (usually)

 

[alee298]

They are huge and one nearly flattened me in a hallway against the wall. They take up too much space I feel claustrophobic in a way.