Re: Thorpe Park
O dear. Where to start... On the one hand it is clearly a terrible idea for me to check the forum whilst at the pub and make such a throwaway comment as I did....but on the other hand provoking fanboys makes me feel warm and fuzzy inside, some of you guys are not on this planet.
Either way I guess I should add some substance to my opinion.
First let us remind ourselves of what X was. X No Way Out was simple put, the worst ride I have ever ridden. You would approach its green and red iron clad pyramid and enter a dilapidated and often filthy plywood tunnel, which was lit almost entirely using a poor mans Christmas lights. After walking for what felt like miles you then boarded a train that was designed for an umpa-lumpa. The train would shoot off backwards and you’d spend the next three minutes trundling around a serious of mind drops and helixes in the dark. At random intervals the train would stop and wobble for a bit whilst the most random of sound effects were blasted at the riders.
I was thrilled that the powers that be had finally deemed the ride to be an embarrassment and in need of some serious TLC. What would they do? Go for something fun and cartoony to try and fit in with Storm Surge? Go all out and make it an iconic addition to the Lost City? No. The meeting went something like this:
Executive A:
We need to re-theme this ride... what do kids like nowdays?
Executive B:
Loud noises and flashing lights?
Executive A:
My God Jerry, you’re a genius!
The theme was completely wrong from the word go. The park had a real chance to say “look, we know Storm Surge was a disaster, but we learnt from it, we’ve built a word class attraction in The Swarm and we’re now trying to bring the rest of the park up to scratch” Instead they went with something that was cheap, brash and noisey (Thorpe in a nutshell I guess.)
So I hated the theme because it didn’t fit. However, I didn't doubt for a second that the idea of an ride based on the abstract ideas of light & sound could still be very enjoyable. For a start the queue line could be an experience in its own right. The things you can do with light go far beyond strobe lights and lasers. They could have done something akin to Space Mountain, with scenes depicting various optical illusions and special effects. They could have gone down the ‘Rock N Rollercoaster’ route and shown various effects in a more educational / technical way, or they could have gone for something interactive with pressure pads or sensors activating special effects.
What did they do? They painted the plywood tunnel with some day-glo paint, added some LEDs and mounted a couple of strobes / lasers on the ceiling. Bravo.
The actual ride continues that trend. It may be a bit of fun and if it had opened at the likes of PBP I’d likely let it off, but for me turning the trains around, pumping out some dance music and chucking in some lasers/strobes/fog does not make a crap ride an awesome ride. Some of the defences I’ve seen in this thread baffle me. The idea that I should have given the ride some slack because it has a really expensive lighting rig for example. Really? Who gives a toss? What does that add to the ride experience? Only the most obsessive of enthusiasts would come off the ride saying “It wasn’t great, but did you get a look at that lighting rig on turn number 3? awesome bit of kit that.”
I do not dislike Thorpe, I actually love the place, but this re-theme sucks.
Finally, no, I have not ridden it yet and I’m aware that most of my opinion can be deemed as void until I have. Most of the time I don’t comment on a ride I haven’t been on, in the same way that I don’t like people criticising a ride during construction. In this instance I have formed a strong opinion based on my prior knowledge of the ride, the reviews, pictures and videos that have been released.
If, during the TST South meet (which I intend on coming to, assuming the fanboy blood lust has subsided,) I ride X and love it I’ll hold my hands up, but I highly doubt that’s going to happen!
Now, chill out the lot of you.
